my ex, and I have we’re together for about four years. my ex was not a horrible human being but he definitely didn’t appreciate me took me for granted a lot of times and I always felt like if I left, he wouldn’t care. In our entirety of our relationship, he tried to break up with me at least 10 times, for small arguments. Obviously this made me extremely insecure. This last time we broke up I was fucking done, I was going through a lot in my personal life and he decided to pull this shit during one of my toughest moments. I decided I don’t deserve this. We continued to talk for about a month during this time he was confused about getting back together, saying he was happier on his own but at the same time he wasn’t sure I decided to cut him off, specifically I told him do not contact me unless you are trying to be serious about getting back together. That was about three months ago. During this time I’ve been working on myself, but still can’t help missing him and wondering if he will come back and be better or did I make a mistake of cutting him off?
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How do I get over this breakup?
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If your ex cut it off or you ended the relationship, both of you weren’t all in. You deserve to be in a healthy relationship that consists of trust, affection, good communication, and intimacy. If you’re not dating anyone or feeling nostalgic for the good times with your ex, take some time for yourself. You might not actually want to get back with your ex. Maybe you’re just feeling lonely.
He has tried to break up with you 10 times. It's time to move on. If that's how you felt in the relationship that if you left he wouldn't care then why be there? I say stop wondering if he will come back, keep working on yourself and just heal completely so when someone new does come in your life you won't have these insecurities you had with your ex.
Ugh girl, he sounds like such a jerk! You definitely did NOT make a mistake by cutting him off. Four years is a long time to be with someone who kept threatening to break up whenever you fought. That's so emotionally draining and it's no wonder it made you insecure.
It's good that you've been using this time to focus on yourself - that's the best thing you could be doing right now. You deserve way better than a guy who only appreciates you when you're not around. Him being "confused" just shows he has no idea what he wants. Don't waste your time waiting around for someone who treated you like an option.
It'll still hurt for a while since you were together so long, but keep reminding yourself of why you left - he didn't value you the way you deserved. Block him everywhere so you're not tempted to check in on him or take him back if he changes his mind. Time apart will help you see how unhappy and unappreciated he made you feel.
You're so much better off without that jerk stressing you out! Go out with your girls, have fun, start dating other guys - anything to stay busy and focus on yourself. He had his chance and blew it so many times. His loss! You'll get over him, just give it more time. But don't ever think you made a mistake by sticking up for yourself. Proud of you, girl!