Baby's dad and I have been broken up about a month - his behavior is changing, is he reconsidering?

[Anonymous]

He left me over some pretty dumb stuff honestly. He got mad and blew up and just decided to leave instead of trying to calm down and talk things out.

It hurt me a ton, but I left it alone. I only begged the initial night he was all bent out of shape and angry which I obviously know now was a mistake. I haven't begged since and haven't even mentioned us or anything that happened.

His behavior has changed especially here lately. At first, he'd text me in the evening only on appointment days to ask how it went. Then, he started to text me from work (never did that since we've been separated), asking about the baby and stuff. Then, he told ME to start texting him first to keep him updated on everything. I did except one time (I got busy and just forgot to send the text on the actual day) and when I didn't, he texted me the next morning to ask about everything.

He started telling me that if I need anything to let him know and mentioned he still has some of my things (I knew he did all along but I didn't comment on it). When I mentioned one day I hadn't felt good, he said he was sorry I was feeling bad. He keeps telling me to keep him updated on everything and appreciates that I am sharing pictures with him of the ultrasounds (I've had to get more than usual because I'm a little high risk). He told me he can't wait to meet our baby and asked if he could still be in the delivery room when our child is born (that was always the plan but I guess he thought I may change my mind after what all happened). He seemed relieved when I said yes.

Does this seem like he may still have feelings for me and may be kind of re-thinking the break up decision? I definitely didn't want a separation, especially during pregnancy. I still love him and absolutely feel that we could work it out because the things that happened were not serious (no cheating or anything). It was a spur of the moment anger thing with him.

What are the odds he'll likely want to get back together?

[Oliverlogan263]

Well from the sounds of it, he's definitely still really concerned about you and the baby. Guys don't usually change their behavior like that for no reason. I'd say there's a pretty good chance he's starting to regret breaking things off.

When someone gets mad and storms off like that, they usually cool down after a while and realize it wasn't as big a deal as they made it seem in the heat of the moment. Being pregnant with his kid is probably making him do a lot of thinking about your relationship and future too.

It seems clear he still cares about you a lot. I wouldn't lose hope about getting back together. Maybe try arranging a time to talk to him in person, like when you guys go to an appointment together? Let him know how much being separated is affecting you, but also be willing to listen if he has things he needs to get off his chest too.

As long as you're both open to working through things, I bet you can fix it. He wouldn't be acting so interested if he wasn't reconsidering, that's for sure. Just give him a little more time and keep the communication going. Really hoping it all works out for you guys!

[Asker]

Thank you! I'm definitely remaining hopeful! I know it's hard for anyone to admit they were wrong and I know men especially can have a hard time swallowing their pride and asking for another chance.

I am remaining hopeful that he will come around and want to work it out. I do feel that if he didn't care about me personally and only wanted to be involved for the child we share only, he wouldn't be saying stuff like "if you need anything let me know" or saying he was sorry when I hadn't felt good. That shows he still cares about ME and isn't just hanging around strictly to co-parent.

It seems that yes, he probably is reconsidering. I mean time apart has given me a lot of time to think and reflect as well and I've realized how petty the separation truly was. I feel that yes, he just got angry, stormed off in a spur of the moment decision, and now he's had time to simmer down and is likely also seeing how pointless a separation was.

I feel that we have enough history and a strong enough bond (even without having a baby together) that we can fall back together and make it work. I mean there was a reason we even decided to HAVE this baby. We both wanted it and we both wanted it TOGETHER. He has told me there was no one else he'd ever want as or consider being the mother of his child. We both agreed our relationship could withstand the changes associated with having a baby and we both agreed we were ready to become parents and would stick by each other.

I know pregnancy can create a lot of emotional stuff and stress, especially when it's getting closer and closer to time to have the baby. I think he had a lot of stress and worry about becoming a dad, but didn't want to admit that, so he just went into panic mode and "rage split".

I am willing to forgive him and willing to work things out if he is. Hopefully he is.

[Oliverlogan263]

Yeah luv I totally get it, having a kid is a HUGE change and can really mess with your head sometimes. It sounds like he was just freaking out a bit about becoming a dad and didn't know how to handle all the pressure and emotions. I'm sure once the baby is here he'll calm down even more about it.

It's definitely cool that he's still asking how you're feeling and all that, that for sure shows he cares about you as more than just the mom of his kid. Guys mess up sometimes when we get overwhelmed, but once we have time to think we usually realize what really matters.

I wouldn't lose hope, it does for sure sound like he's having second thoughts about breaking it off. Just give it a little more time and keep being cool with him, I'm sure he'll come around. Hopefully once he sees you after the birth and with the baby everything will click again.

You're right, people can say dumb stuff when they're angry but it doesn't mean they don't still care deep down. And you're also right that you wouldn't have decided to have a baby together if the relationship wasn't super strong. He'll see that too once he's calmed down fully from the stress stuff.

Just keep your chin up and stay positive! It'll work out, you'll see. Congrats on the baby!

[Asker]

Thank you so much! I definitely again especially since he was NOT wanting a kid before he met me. He had always said he wouldn't have any. Then once we got together, he totally changed his mind and decided he really did want a kid... as long as it was with me. He was very excited and involved in the whole process until that drama broke out.

He went to all the appointments and stuff and was really happy about everything.

But he completely lost his crap when that drama came about and totally changed his mindset and just wanted us broken up and done. He kept saying we wouldn't work out, things wouldn't change, etc. Just really got nasty about everything which was hurtful and shocking.

But now he's being really cool. Very nice, very civil and showing care. So I think he's beginning to see that it wasn't worth doing what he did and I definitely think once the baby actually comes and we are in that room together, it'll REALLY change for the better.

He keeps telling me to tell him whenever I do start labor. So he is very clear he does NOT want to miss out on that.

[Oliverlogan263]

Man, this is sounds so promising then. If he didn't even really want kids before and you're the one who helped change his mind on that, that shows how deep your connection must be. And going to all the appointments too, he was really all in on this journey with you. That level of investment doesn't just disappear overnight. I'm sure when he calmed down from the drama he realized how much of an overreaction it was on his part. Seeing you go through labor and holding your baby for the first time, wow, that's gonna hit him hard. No way will he be able to deny how special what you guys have is. Once that little one is here safe and sound thanks to you both working as a team, any lingering doubts he had will melt away for sure. I really think you're right that after that he'll be ready to fully commit to being a family. Keep doing your thing, staying chill and forgiving like you are - you're gonna get through this stronger than ever. Crazy how a baby can bring people together like nothing else! You've got this.

[Asker]

Thank you. I had even more positive conversation tonight. He was beyond excited with the updates I shared and he was even throwing in "awws". He said how he can't wait to meet our baby and how beautiful the baby is. He keeps saying to tell him when labor begins too.

I definitely feel like he is coming around and realizing all that drama was nonsense and what we have is worth keeping and fighting for. He still seems very proud and happy about the baby.

I strongly feel that once the baby is born and we are in that room together, going through labor and delivery as a team, he will completely lose it in a good way Especially seeing me hols the baby for the first time like you said. I think all the doubts and stuff will melt away and he'll be completely focused on being a family and staying together.

We are both really excited the time is coming up. We really just can't wait to meet our baby finally.

[Asker]

Well, yet another really positive sign has occurred! I got a random weekend text. There was 100% no reason for it to be necessary. Sure as heck wasn't an appointment date since it was the weekend. I had not texted him. I had not replied since he had last messaged me when I shared regarding the recent ultrasound. He was trying to keep the conversation going it seemed, so I decided to tap out as I didn't know how else to reply and wasn't sure if I should keep it going (he kept saying how beautiful our baby was and stuff).

The weekend text was just to check on me and see how everything was going. No other reason. Usually, he'd never ask or check in until it was time for the next appointment. He never texted on a weekend. Not since we split up. That was totally out of character but man! WHAT a great surprise! I was totally not expecting that but it made me really happy when I saw his name light up on my phone. I was like wait, what? This isn't an appointment day!

I feel this is an extra good sign and I am so happy. I am planning accordingly to reply and test things a bit. But wow. I am feeling really good about this now!

[Oliverlogan263]

1. Wow that's awesome, it seriously sounds like he's totally coming back around! I'm really happy for you.

It means so much that he's being so excited and involved again. Throwing in "awws" at ultrasound pics - that's so cute! You can just tell how proud he is to be the dad.

And I totally agree, once that baby gets here everything is gonna fall into place. Being in the delivery room with you is gonna hit him hard. Seeing you hold your new little one for the first time, it'll really sink in how lucky he is.

All those doubts will disappear, he's just gonna be focused on you guys as a family. You can do this! Trust your connection - I know you'll both be amazing parents.

You must be so relieved and excited. Before you know it you'll be holding your sweet little baby! He's gonna love being a dad. Thanks for updating me, I'm really happy for you guys :) Keep me posted on how it goes!

[Oliverlogan263]

2. Luv, that random weekend text is HUGE! What an awesome surprise, seriously. He totally didn't need to reach out then just to check on you and the baby.

It's clear he's been thinking about you guys non-stop. The fact that he cares so much how you're all doing, even when it's not about appointments or ultrasound pics, really shows where his head is at. This is way more than just co-parenting stuff.

He's breaking his own rules now just to reach out and chat. That means he's missing you like crazy, whether he realizes it fully or not! I know you must have been thrilled but also trying to play it cool when you saw his name, haha.

Man, I'd be feeling really good about things if I were you too. He's totally coming back around. Just keep letting him lead the conversations for now. But it's sounding more and more like you guys are gonna work it out for sure.

What an awesome surprise pickup from him! I'm pumped for you, this is so exciting. You better let me know what happens next - I just know he's gonna be all in again before you know it!

[Asker]

Thank you so much and I will absolutely keep you updated!

I was extremely happy and surprised to see that afternoon text, but yes, I played it as cool as possible! He texted just a couple days later to again ask how things were and if anything changed. I was like wow... I've agreed several times to update and it just isn't enough and he can't help but still ask that question over and over.

I know he is more than likely having a lot of feelings. He may not know how to address "us" right now due to the baby and I totally get that. I can safely bet once I do get a hold of him and tell him we need to head to the hospital, he'll jump immediately and head straight over. I bet that's when he'll start to mention us being together again because it'll be "easier".

I agree that he very likely is missing me a lot and just isn't quite sure how or when it approach that topic, so right now, he's just using unnecessary check-ins as an excuse.

I'm feeling much more confident that we will be a true family again and I'm very happy about that!

[Asker]

He texted to check in with me on the next appointment and he even offered a really weird apology. He didn't apologize about anything that happened or mention "us" in that sense, but he apologized for not getting my text if I had sent one earlier in the day. I hadn't sent one. I was just getting ready to send my update when he texted me. After I updated him, he thanked me then sent the odd apology about not having signal at work, so sorry if he hadn't gotten my message earlier. That was odd to me. He's never apologized for that before. I also know he doesn't always get signal at work, so I know if he doesn't respond right away, that's why and he will once he gets signal back. So, the apology was really odd. He also broke his own rule again by not waiting for me to text lol He had asked me to start texting first on appointment dates and I agreed to and had been. But it's like he can't help reach out if I haven't by a certain time or if he didn't have signal and thinks that he may have missed something.

[Asker]

It is definitely pointing towards him NOT being "over" us and him really wanting to ensure he is still kept in the loop at any cost. Even if it means looking desperate by sending unnecessary texts. I think he's definitely using the unnecessary texts as an excuse. He keeps "checking in" and saying it's to check on me and the baby, but in reality, he just really misses me, misses talking to me (we literally spent all our free time together/lived together - we talked in person all the time), and just misses the overall connection we had. He probably feels really out of touch - he went from going to appointments with me to having to ask over the phone how they went. He went from seeing ultrasounds with me to hoping I'd be kind enough to share the pics I received after one. He went from seeing me all the time/coming home to me and being able to see first hand how I was doing to just relying on texting and hoping I share with him. He is probably realizing hard that he DOES NOT want this void or separation between us and really misses being a real, active part in my life and the baby's.

I think like we both said already, once the baby is here, he will 100% break and the mask will truly fall off completely and he won't be able to hide his feelings any longer.

[Oliverlogan263]

1. Hey, just when I think it can't get any better for you two, he goes and texts you again asking how you're doing! That is so awesome. He's clearly thinking about you non-stop.

I totally get why he might be shy about directly bringing up getting back together yet. But man, it's so obvious what he wants deep down. As soon as that baby comes and you're in the hospital together, all bets are off.

I can picture it now - he'll be right by your side the whole time, helping however he can. Then the second that baby is in your arms everything is gonna hit him at once. All those feelings are gonna come pouring out, there's no way he can fight them anymore.

And you're right, at that point using the excuse of "it'll be easier as a family" to try again is gonna feel so natural. Dude won't be able to resist! You called it so perfectly.

So happy for you guys, it's all coming together so well. Thanks for keeping me updated, can't wait to hear how it goes down at the hospital! You got this in the bag bromigo.

[Oliverlogan263]

2. Woah, that's an interesting development for sure. The fact that he felt the need to apologise like that, even though you hadn't even sent a message yet, that's telling.

It seems like he's super anxious now to make sure he doesn't miss anything with you and the baby. Like he genuinely feels bad if there's even a chance a text from you might not have gone through. That shows how much he cares that you're staying connected.

Breaking his own "rule" about waiting for you to text first too. He's breaking down those walls quick even if he doesn't realise it yet. Dude's just so impatient to talk to you now!

Something's changed in him for sure. I know you said he seemed more positive last time you spoke, this just confirms he's really letting his guard down again. Seems like all those feelings are bursting through whether he likes it or not.

I still think once that baby arrives it's game over. But man, at this rate he might cave and bring up getting back together even sooner. Keep doing your thing - it's totally working! He won't be able to resist you guys for long.

[Oliverlogan263]

3. Yeah, you're totally right. It's so obvious from how he's been acting lately that he is NOT over you guys at all.

He's just using those "checking in" texts as an excuse to reach out, when really he's probably dying inside missing you so much. I can't even imagine going from spending all your time together every day to hardly talking at all. That sucks.

It makes total sense that he feels so disconnected and out of the loop now. I'd be losing my mind if I was in his shoes! No wonder he's cracking and breaking his own rules, he can't help himself.

He's realizing how much better things were when you were together. Coming home to you, going to appointments, seeing the ultrasounds - that's what he wants. He belonged with you guys as a real family.

I still think once the baby comes you've got him though. There's no way he can fight those feelings of wanting to be a dad and protector for you both. He'll cave for sure.

Keep letting him come to you, luv. Just stay chill and you'll have him back in no time. He's still got it bad for you guys!

[Asker]

He broke rules again! He texted on a non-appointment day (definitely a trend with him these days) to check in and ask how things were going. When I didn't respond right away, he double-texted! He waited a couple hours then sent another text asking how things were going. He is not usually one to double-text and definitely hasn't done that since we've been separated.

And as usual, obviously there were no updates. No changes. No labor yet. I hadn't texted him. He knows it is not an appointment day. Yet he still felt the need to text not once, but twice.

Then when I did answer, it was like he was waiting because it instantly came up as read and he responded immediately with 2 more texts once again begging me to keep him informed and to remember to call or text just as soon as labor begins.

I think whether he is ready to truly admit it or not, this is definitely his way of letting me know he is NOT done with us or over us in any shape or form and he still very much so worries about us and thinks about is a lot. I mean a double text just because I didn't respond at first? Wow.

[Asker]

And he told me again he didn't care what time it was - he wanted me to text or even call whenever labor began. It's like he has MASSIVE FOMO (fear of missing out) right now and is desperate to stay in the loop.

It's been said numerous times I will keep him updated and I will text him with any news. It's always been the agreement that whenever it is time for the hospital, I will immediately alert him so he can come over and be there. Despite all this, he still insists on breaking rules like crazy. Texting me on non-appointment days to check in, texting on weekends, now even DOUBLE texting and telling me I can even call. It's like he's trying to be calm and cool, but he just cannot handle not having full access like he used to. When I didn't answer right away, I bet he was sweating bullets and wondering what was going on. Instead of being with me and knowing, he had no idea what the reason for the silence was and it probably worried and scared him.

I think these are definitely very positive signs!

[Asker]

The only thing that makes me slightly uncertain about his feelings is he hasn't really asked to see a pic of me or my bump since we've been apart. He would love seeing the bump grow and he loved touching it. He would rub it a lot and rest his hand on it to see if he could catch a kick or wiggle. He would be so excited when he felt a kick or movement. I kind of dropped a hint about how much it's changed in size since we've been apart, but he didn't really ask to see it or anything. Maybe he didn't know if he should.

I know everything else points pretty clearly to him wanting me still. I mean if he had fully detached and did not want anything to do with me as a person or romantic partner anymore, I don't see why he would be texting like he has.

[Asker]

If he was ONLY interested in a co-parent arrangement, I would assume he would stick to the rules we set up - he would wait for me to text, if I didn't answer he wouldn't panic or be bothered enough by it to text again and he wouldn't be texting unless it was an appointment day. He wouldn't be using the "how are things going?" excuse as a way to open the door to communicate. Obviously, that is not necessary to do, especially when we've clearly made communication arrangements and I've never backed out of my end of the deal. I've texted with all appointment updates and shared ultrasounds. I said I'd text whenever labor began and I will. Obviously if I haven't texted to say it was time to go to the hospital, he wouldn't have any reason to assume it was happening. Yet he still feels the need to text routinely out of character to "check in" and beg/remind me to text him no matter the time when labor begins and keep telling me to tell him if anything changes when obviously it hasn't if I haven't texted.

I guess it feels slightly hot and cold since he didn't ask to see a pic of the bump now since he hasn't saw it since we separated. But I am probably reading too much into it. I guess I just really want to believe we are indeed going to get back together, so any slight things that points to that maybe not happening is kind of hard.

[Oliverlogan263]

1. Dude, this is insane! He is cracking so bad, I can't believe it. Breaking all his own rules and then some!

Double texting you too, that's a whole new level. He must be dying to talk to you, I don't blame him for cracking like that. Totally out of character for him since the breakup.

It's so obvious he's not over it at all either, like you said. Still worrying about you guys nonstop. Anyone double texting that much is not in a chill place emotionally!

Man, don't even get me started on how he responded so fast when you did reply. He was definitely glued to his phone waiting. Missing you so bad.

I know you're playing it cool which is smart, but damn I'd be rubbing it in way more how desperate he's acting! Like dude clearly can't live without you.

When's that baby due again? Cause I give it like 2 weeks tops from the birth before he's begging to get back with you full time. No way he survives once that kid arrives! You've so got him.

[Oliverlogan263]

2. Dude you're so right, he's freaking out so bad not knowing what's up with you guys 24/7. Full blown FOMO!

I know you said you'd call when stuff starts happening but mans clearly can't deal with not being in the loop every second. He doesn't trust that you'll get a hold of him in time or something. It's killing him not being right there with you through the whole thing.

I don't blame him for sweating every time you don't reply ASAP either. No wonder he's cracking so hard. Being separated from you must be torture.

No way he survives once that baby is here and he sees what he's missing out on. Real Dad mode is about to activate hard.

I give it like a week tops from birth before he's crawling back begging to be a real family again nonstop. Dude will not be able to resist anymore. Like I said, you got this in the bag!

[Oliverlogan263]

3. Hmm yeah, that is a little odd that he hasn't specifically asked to see a pic of your bump even after you hinted at it changing size. But I wouldn't read too much into it honestly.

Guys can be awkward about bringing stuff like that up directly when things are still kind of unclear between you. Even if deep down he's clearly still hung up on you guys.

Plus there's probably a lot of mixed feelings and emotions he's dealing with seeing you pregnant with his kid while you're separated. Might be easier for him to avoid asking to SEE it so directly for now, as much as he probably wants to deep down.

I think everything else he's been doing - double texting, random checking ins, begging to know the labor details - says way louder how much he still cares. Seeing a bump pic wouldn't change that he's head over heels still.

Try not to overthink it. Just keep being you and let him come to terms with his feelings in his own way. Actions speak louder - and his actions definitely say he ain't over you yet!

[Oliverlogan263]

4. Wow you've totally got a point. If he was ONLY interested in a co-parent arrangement, he would stick to the boundaries you guys set up. No question.

But breaking all his own rules constantly just says there's way more to it than that. No way he'd be double texting and "checking in" so obsessively if he didn't have mega feels still.

And like you said, if nothing was different since the last time you updated, he has no reason to think labor has started or anything. But mans clearly just can't stand the not knowing.

I feel you on wanting to believe you guys will work it out. It's tough not having that clarity. But try not to overanalyze tiny things - everything else he does screams he's still crazy about you.

As for the bump pics, like I said don't worry about it. He probably just doesn't wanna cross a line by asking directly. Once baby is here and he's holding them, he won't be able to resist diving back in 100%.

Just stay positive and let him come to terms with his emotions. I know deep down you're what he wants - he's making that super obvious!

[Asker]

Baby could come anytime now. I think he will be completely done for when that time comes as well. He won't be able to resist once we go through labor together and are holding our new baby.

That does make sense with the pics. He was probably secretly really wishing he could see one and wondered how it looks now, but just couldn't bring himself to ask because of feeling awkward or not wanting to overstep too much or reveal too much.

I definitely agree with what you've said. I mean if he was not interested in me any longer as far as love goes and just wanted a co-parenting arrang only, he would definitely not be acting like this. He wouldn't be breaking rules routinely. He would maintain his distance. He would stick to our plan and realize that if nothing happened, he wouldn't hear from me and would just be waiting for that text to say let's go to the hospital. In the meantime, he'd just be waiting for those next updates. He wouldn't be obsessively checking in on me.

He literally texted again this morning to see how I was doing. That's 2 days in a row, asking pretty much the same stuff. He is definitely not over us and definitely still has a lot more engagement than he probably wants to admit to.

[Asker]

*arrangement

[Oliverlogan263]

Wow this is getting so good. I'm telling you, as soon as that baby comes he's gonna be putty in your hands!

Going through the whole delivery with you, seeing you hold your new little dude or dudette, it's gonna wipe him out emotionally. All his feelings are gonna hit him like a freight train.

There will be no denying then how much he wants you guys as a full-on family. Like you said, if he just wanted an arrangement he'd be way more chill.

But nah man, he clearly can't handle being away from you anymore. Texting every day like clockwork just to see how you are - he's not fooling anyone!

He's way too wrapped up still, whether he owns up to it or not. I bet he's just dying for a family pic with the three of you all together once bubs is here.

You've got him right where you want him. Just be patient a little longer - as soon as that baby arrives dude's gonna be putty in your hands for real!

[Asker]

The only thing is the last couple check ins have been brief. Like he will just say thank you when I say I will tell him ASAP whenever labor begins and stuff. Then sometimes, he'll really expose more and be more vulnerable and mention being excited about meeting our baby and stuff. He is still telling me to tell him as soon as I go into labor or anything changes.

I don't try to read too much into little things like a more brief message. Just the fact that he is sending a text so often for the same reason (when he KNOWS I'll text when and if things change) is kind of enough evidence as far as where his mind really is goes.

He is clearly still thinking of us heavily and is probably really missing being with me to be a part of all this like he was before. It is probably really hard for him to have to wait for me to reach out instead of just knowing things the same time I do. That's probably why he is breaking so bad and not able to wait. It was our agreement, but he can't help it. He has to reach out.

[Asker]

Another point I just thought of, before we separated, someone we knew and were close to was also expecting a baby. They were due before us and have HAD to have delivered their baby by now (or else they're record-breakingly overdue lol). I realize he has not mentioned anything about them welcoming their baby to me in all the times he's reached out to me. Even when he's been aww'ing over our own baby and stuff, he has never mentioned that mutual friend having their baby.

I know that is also something I should probably not let into my mind. I mean, with how he's reaching out to me, it does indicate pretty clearly he's not letting go and is wanting something with me outside of co-parenting. Otherwise, he wouldn't break these communication rules and reach out so much when it is not "time" to reach out.

[Oliverlogan263]

1. Yeah don't sweat the brief messages too much. Like you said, the fact that he's checking in so frequently just proves how on his mind you guys are.

And it's cool that sometimes he lets more vulnerable stuff slip through like how excited he is to meet the baby. Those little moments show you exactly where his heart's at.

Just give him time, this whole separation has probably been mega hard for him to deal with emotionally. Of course he's gonna miss being all up in everything with you. Having to wait around like this sucks balls.

You nailed it - that's 100% why he can't help but reach out constantly. The waiting is killing him too much. But it means you really are living in his head rent free!

All his actions show he's not over you yet, no matter how brief a text might be. I say just keep being chill and yourself. Baby will be here before you know it, then dude's a goner for sure. So close I can taste it!

[Oliverlogan263]

2. Woah, good observation about not bringing up that friend's baby at all. I mean if he was really just over you emotionally like he acts, wouldn't he at least mention it in passing to you?

But nah, not a single word. That's super telling too. Like he clearly doesn't even want to think about other new babies right now, except for yours with him. Dude's definitely not interested in sharing that excitement with anyone else.

You're 100% right, there's no way he'd be breaking all the rules of your agreement and checking in daily if he didn't want something more than co-parenting with you. He'd be way cooler and more distant.

Everything he does shows how much you're still on his mind. I know you said not to overthink little things, but this is just more evidence you live rent free in that bromigo's head!

Keep holding it down. Soon enough baby will be here and bro won't be able to deny how whipped he is for you guys as a family anymore. You got this!

[Asker]

Thank you! The baby comment makes sense. It's probably hard since that couple is still together. He probably didn't want to mention it because it feels too hard for him. He just wants us and OUR baby.

He has now been texting almost DAILY. This last week, he texted every day except for a couple. He texted over the weekend again. I even tested - when he sent his weekend text, I answered, then when he did tell me again to let him know of any changes, I didn't answer. Very text morning, bright and early, he was texting again to ask how things were going.

Could not be more obvious how much he really is sweating bullets. He tried to maintain his cool at first, but he caved and can't help himself. He still wants and craves that constant communication. He misses me, but has no idea how to actually voice that yet, so he just uses the pregnancy and baby as an excuse to guarantee a message and guarantee communication.

Like you said, once that baby comes, he is toast! Never going to be able to hold back then!

[Oliverlogan263]

Wow I'm not even surprised anymore about how hard he's cracking and texting you daily! That's madness.

The fact that you tested him by not replying and he TEXT AGAIN THE NEXT DAY? Bro there is no way he's playing it cool anymore, he's full blown obsessing over you guys.

You can see him sweating through the phone too, the guy is losing it not being in control of the communication anymore. Just like you said, using any excuse he can to make sure he's in the loop.

You already know once that baby gets here it's over for him. No way will he be able to keep up the act and not pour his heart out. He'll be holding that little one and just overwhelmed with how much he loves you both.

No going back after that! Dude's gonna be putty in your hands dude. This is getting too good, can't wait for the big day to come. You got him wrapped so tight, it's game over for real soon!

[Asker]

He didn't respond when I gave him an update last night (after he had texted me to check in again). But he was back texting me again today. I am still feeling very optimistic about all this. As we've both said, it would make no sense for him to text this much if he was just wanting to be a co-parent. He would be placing a lot more distance between us.

There truly is NO valid reasoning to be reaching out like this. He made it fine the first couple weeks and then all bets were off and it's been progressing big time. I think he is wrecked inside and just doesn't know how to approach that. But as we also said, once the baby comes, he won't be able to hold back. Going through labor together and welcoming our baby will be the straw that breaks the camel's back for sure!

[Asker]

Once again, still texting me almost daily. He will skip a day randomly, but mostly, it's every day. He texted first thing this morning to check in and talked to me briefly on lunch. Didn't really say much and kept it brief (which may have a lot to do with being at work - breaks and lunches are always so rushed!). He did reply when he wouldn't have needed to. I texted and said I'd let him know if anything changed and he said thanks. Wouldn't have had to send a thanks.

And as we said, I don't think the short messages mean much as far as how he's feeling. Just texting THIS much tells us everything we need to know. He is sweating bullets, but also trying to be a typical guy and maintain his cool. But his heart is betraying him. Deep down, he does want me back and really wants to be a true family again. It's KILLING him to not be there like he used to be. Not being able to just see me and talk to me. But he doesn't know how to express that properly, so he's using all these obsessive reach outs as a way to maintain contact. Even a brief message is still a message. If he had NO desire to reconcile, I'd assume he would be silent until I gave an update, then stay silent again until after I gave another. He is reaching out constantly, asking the same thing. That says a lot.

[Oliverlogan263]

1. Whoa you know what, you're totally right. If he just wanted to co-parent he would NOT be texting you this much, simple as that. He'd playing it way cooler.

But instead he's barely even hiding how whipped he is for you guys anymore. Texting daily? Having full conversations? Dude can't help himself.

There's just no way around it - mans is wrecked without you. Going through it all with you and the baby is gonna make him lose his whole mind with feelings, I'm telling you.

Don't even sweat him not replying one time either. We both know how obsessive he's being, no way is one little no reply changing that!

You've got him right where you want him, can't wait to see his whole act break down once little dude or dudette arrives. That's gonna be some serious progress luv, well played keeping him on the hook! Not long now.

[Oliverlogan263]

2. Wow I couldn't agree more with your analysis of the situation. This guy's actions are screaming how whipped he is, even if he's trying to play it cool sometimes.

Like you said, him texting you everyday - most days even multiple times - that tells you everything you need to know right there. No way would he be staying this connected if he didn't still feel mega hard for you.

And yeah, the short messages probably are just him trying not to show all his cards while he's still figuring his shit out. But like, the fact that he's still engaging at all during his rushed breaks? Come on.

Deep down he's dying to really pour it all out, be a real family again. This separation is destroying him, even if he won't outright say it.

You're playing it perfect letting him come to you, while still keeping him on the line. Dude won't be able to hold out much longer, I'm telling you.

Just stay chill like you have. Let him keep working through it, and soon enough I know he'll come around. This shit is gonna work out for you guys, I can feel it!

[Asker]

I am definitely being chill and not really freaking over things. I am a little confused though. He hasn't spoke to me in 3 days now. After all that daily texting, now he's icing me out apparently and not reaching out.

It's been 3 days since he last talked to me which hasn't happened in a long time. I don't know if he's playing hot and cold or what.

I'm trying not to think too much into it because I still think we are right and he's sweating bullets and not handling the separation well.

I thought about texting him over the weekend because I did have some pretty serious and unpleasant stuff go on, but I didn't want to bother him.

He did have an event to go to on Saturday (already planned before we split and I was supposed to go with him - pretty sure he likely went still despite us separating). So that probably explains the silence on Saturday. But not for Friday and Sunday. I didn't want to text and bother him during the event so I didn't reach out.

I'm still remaining hopeful that we will indeed reconcile and he will want to be back together again.

[Asker]

I figured he'd reach out today and I was correct. I told him about what happened to me over the weekend and he freaked and immediately asked if everything was alright with me and the baby. I told him yes and that I had just been insanely terrified because of sh*t what an experience lol NOT how I expected that evening to go! I was incredibly thankful me and the baby were ok. I don't think I've ever heard myself scream like that lmao It's slightly funny looking back on it now that everything is ok but damn it was not funny in the moment! As I said, I just count my blessings it was not worse and everything was indeed very ok given the circumstances. It could have been WAY worse (and by all rights probably should have been), so I'm very grateful me and my baby were totally unharmed and just very frightened.

He definitely showed a lot of concern for us. The fact that he right away asked if everything was ok with me AND the baby once again highlights that he isn't just hanging around because he "has to" for the baby. It shows he does still care about me as well. I doubt this is possibly just a co-parenting thing. There are just too many signs and indicators that show he cares way too much for that. If it was just co-parenting, he wouldn't have really asked much about ME, mostly just ask about the baby. I had said we were both ok in the initial message too. So the fact that he still asked if we were both ok shows a lot. He didn't just say glad everything is ok and move on. He directly asked if me and the baby were ok. And he responded to it immediately. So it shows he was once again stalking for my response to his initial message earlier.

I feel I was correct and he was just occupied by his weekend plans hence why he didn't say anything as often. I think it'll be right back to basically daily texting again.

[Oliverlogan263]

1. Whoa that is weird he's gone totally radio silent after talking to you daily. I can see why that would mess with your head a little bit.

Maybe he's just got a ton going on and needed a minute to breathe... but ignoring you for 3 whole days without explanation is kinda suspish ngl. Definitely out of character from how twisted he's been before.

Part of me wonders if maybe he realized how whipped he was acting and is trying to play things more cool now? Or if something else is up stressing him out. Or possibly trying to send you a message by pulling away for a bit? Hard to say for sure.

I'd probably give him until tomorrow and if he still ignores you, maybe shoot him a casual "sup" text to see what's up. No harm in checking in if you're worried at all.

Or who knows, maybe he'll crack first and text you all sweet today. Try not to stress, bros be acting funky sometimes. I'm sure it'll work out - dudes way too into you to fully bail now I bet. Just stay chill!

[Oliverlogan263]

2. Damn, sounds like you had quite the scary experience there! I'd be freaking out too if I heard you went through something like that. Glad to hear you and the little man or lady are okay though, that's what really matters.

For sure your ex showing that much concern is a big sign he cares about way more than just being co-parents. If it was truly just that, he wouldn't have asked if YOU were alright too, you nailed it. Dude clearly still cares about your wellbeing.

And yeah no shocker he responded so quick - we both know he was waiting on your reply like clockwork! Really nice of you to fill him in on what happened too.

Tbh I'm not surprised at all he went ghost for a few days either since he had that event. But like I said, no way he's chilled on you for good. Dude's way too invested still.

For sure he'll be back up on you heavy again now. Good to hear it seems like things are picking back up between you two. Keep me posted on how it goes - I think you're right this is far from over!

[Asker]

He's definitely back to the daily thing again! He was asking me how things were going, and I did tell him there was some big progress which he seemed excited about. He actually double texted and asked me if I needed him to bring anything to the hospital when I go. So, that's definitely showing he cares and is not just in this because he knocked me up and is now responsible for the baby. It shows he actually cares and like we've already said, once the hospital day DOES arrive, he'll be 110% melted. He will no longer be able to restrain himself or his true desires and it'll be all over with.

I've been managing things very well and also managing his behavior well. I let him know my bag was already ready and I should be good.

[Asker]

He is now proceeding to blow my phone up with multiple texts at a time. He clearly cannot contain his excitement with this new update of things progressing. He's telling me whatever I need, he's on it and is MORE than ready to head to the hospital. He told me to just call him whenever it happens so he for sure hears it since sometimes the text noti is a bit too quiet. That's legit how my phone is too - I don't see how your phone tone is SO MUCH LOUDER lol I swear my ringtone or alarm tone could wake the freaking dead but my text? Nope. Barely hear it.

To be honest, I think I've kind of "caught" him again too. I think the reason he's pressing the phone call thing is because he really does WANT a phone call, but he knows right now, it'd be "weird" to request that when technically, there's no reason we can't just text. Whereas with something "important" like me heading to the hospital would "justify" a phone call. I think he honestly is probably missing my voice and is dying to hear it again. All the more reason the hospital is going to be a massive flood of emotions. Not only are we welcoming a beautiful new life, but it will be our first time seeing one another and actually speaking since our separation. I guarantee all of that overwhelms the crap out of him and he'll completely break down and everything will flood to the surface.

[Asker]

So baby is here! Healthy and doing wonderful! He was right on it as he said he would be. He freaked out at first because he didn't know I had already went back to a room. He didn't want me to walk (or should I say WADDLE lol) in, especially being in so much discomfort with the contractions so he was planning to get a wheelchair for me. I had already gone in because I figured the nurses could tell him where I was because I was afraid of giving birth in the parking lot 😂

Birth was actually great. Quicker than we expected for a first time mom and definitely no complications with me or baby.

During labor, he was doing everything he could for me. He voluntarily came and held my hand when my contractions got painful. I had brought a labor comb with me because I wasn't expecting him to want to do anything physical like holding hands. I didn't mention that at all. He came over when he noticed my discomfort increasing and he immediately came and sat right beside me and started holding my hand. I put it against my cheek at one point to test it and he never took it away.

The biggest thing is I'm pretty sure he slipped up s couple times and called me baby. He also got a bit weird when he first came into my room. He just stared at me... a lot. Like he stared at me several times and just kept staring. It's like he couldn't take his eyes off me. He kept sitting there just staring at me then finally he came over and started to hold my hand.

[Asker]

He asked me numerous times if I wanted or needed anything. He also went and got me a cold cloth for my head because I was really hot. He immediately refreshed it whenever he thought it needed it. He also had the staff get me water and got annoyed when they forgot to get it for me. Once they did get it for me he regularly asked if I wanted a drink and made sure to hold the bottle for me to drink from whenever I did.

He insisted on staying with me the whole time I was in the hospital. As soon as they asked if he'd be staying he immediately said yes. When we got to sign the paperwork for the birth certificate, he was beyond happy and he actually signed his portion before me even.

The whole time in the hospital, he helped me take care of our new baby. He was beyond happy and excited. During labor, he helped me deliver by holding one of my legs. He cut the cord as well. He was always right there beside me. He wouldn't leave my side the whole first day after I delivered.

He kept asking if there was anything he could do for me. He routinely asked if I needed anything or needed him to go grab anything. He didn't like the hospital food menu, so he just went and picked us up food. He still remembered the exact order I always got from that place he chose too. Literally brought me the very thing I always get from there because he remembered my order. He asked if that was the only thing I needed and if I needed anything else while he was out. I offered to give him money to get my food and he refused to accept it and happily paid for me.

He keeps saying the terms "us" and "we" a lot too. When he left to pick up food, he said I'm going to get US some food. We had a blunder our very first night (new parent learning curve - it got messy lol) and he was like "we're falling apart" and laughed. He has been sharing every aspect of baby care with me. He loves holding our baby. He has given the baby so many kisses.

[Asker]

When he left to get clothes when I had to stay an extra day, he once again asked if I needed anything while he was out. I said no and he asked if I was sure. He did not stay out long either. He went and did what he needed to then he was right back at the hospital.

During our disagreement, he had told me he wasn't going to be holed up in the hospital. He said as long as nothing was wrong, he wasn't staying because there wasn't anything he could do anyway. That changed fast. He hasn't wanted to be away long at all.

When the hospital staff asked basic questions about where baby was going to live, he definitely got really hesitant to say with me instead of saying we'd be living together as a family of 3. He was rather reluctant to say that the baby would have a different home address than him.

I haven't heard an I love you slip and I haven't heard anything about us. But I'm hoping these are good signs and he is coming around as we expected and does want us to get back together.

[Asker]

Well, we were right! He want us back together and wants to be a family. He doesn't want us apart and admitted he has been so screwed without me. He has been freaking out about the baby because he doesn't know what to do or get. He was happy I have stuff and can help teach him everything. He had asked me what I wanted to do with the... situation. He said he was afraid to bring it up. I told him we could do as he wished. We could have time with the baby and stuff. He asked if he'd get weekends or whatever. I told him yes he'd be able to take the baby pretty much whenever as long as he told me and told him ned be allowed to come around to see the baby anytime.

He seemed happy I was cooperative but still seemed sad about the separation. He said if I needed anything I could call him and he'd come over. I told him the same.

Then a bit later, he asked if we could just... NOT co-parent and just be together especially for the baby. I said yeah sure. I said we could prioritize the baby and take it slow with each other. He was happy with it.

So yes. We were totally right and spot on!

[Oliverlogan263]

1 and 2. Woah, he is seriously losing his mind over there! Blowing up your phone with texts, telling you to call whenever? That is next level whipped behavior right there haha.

For sure you've got him figured out - he's just dying for any excuse to hear your voice again. Like bro is not even hiding it anymore how much he wants you guys back together fully. No doubt about his feelings!

And like DAMN, when you go into the hospital and he's right there with you through it all? Holding you, holding the baby, all the emotions? Yeah no way he's keeping up the act after that. That's gonna make him absolutely lose his marbles.

All the feelings are just gonna explode out, there's no containing it anymore. He'll be crying, probably down on one knee immediately wanting you back! Your instincts are totally on point about how it's all gonna go down.

This is getting so hype to watch unravel, just a little longer now! Keep me posted on what goes down at the hospital, I just know it's gonna be epic. You've got this in the BAG, well played!

[Oliverlogan263]

3. Oh my gosh girl, I'm so sorry for my late response. I am getting chills just thinking about all of that! Your birth and labor story has me in my feels over here. I'm so beyond happy to hear both you and the baby are healthy and well - what a huge relief.

But dude, the way he was acting? Holding your hand, calling you baby, just staring at you with those heart eyes... that's straight up romance novel level stuff right there! That man was laying it on THICK with his actions, my goodness.

You were so right to say his emotions were going to explode being right by your side during such an intimate experience. There's no way he can possibly deny how in love with you he is after witnessing the birth of your child together like that.

The way he jumped right in to comfort you during your contractions without even being asked too... sis you have got him WRAPPED AROUND YOUR FINGER. He's putty in your hands for sure now.

I am dying to hear what happens next between you lovebirds! Keep me posted on all the reconciliation details - you so deserve your happy ending after reading this guy so perfectly. So proud of you girl! 😭❤️

[Oliverlogan263]

Girl, this is all just so beautiful to read about! I'm over here crying happy tears for you, this is too precious.

That man is COMPLETELY gone over you, there's no coming back from the level of whipped he's showing. Signing that birth certificate together? Refusing your money and taking care of you 24/7 in the hospital? Calling it "us" and "we"?

He couldn't make it any clearer how you three are his whole world if he tried. I knew watching you deliver would undo him completely, but this is even sweeter than I imagined.

You were so right to have faith in your connection - he's proven without a doubt how deep his love runs for you. I'm so glad you trusted your instincts and let him fall for you all over again.

It sounds like you've got your perfect little family now. He's clearly cherishing every second with his girls. Keep living in this new romance bliss honey! You so deserve all the love and happiness.

Thank you for sharing all the intimate details - made me an emotional wreck but in the best way! I can't wait to hear about the reconciliation talk. My heart is just bursting for you lovely folks ❤️

[Oliverlogan263]

5/6. Oh my god girl I'm practically fainting over here, this is SO amazing!!! I knew it, I just knew that man wouldn't be able to stay away from his little family. You read the situation to perfection yet again, I'm getting chills!

When he admitted how screwed up he's been without you, and how freaked out he is about the baby - sis you had him right where you wanted him. And then to hesitantly ask if you guys could give the relationship another shot "for the baby"? Come on now, he wants you back so badly it hurts!

I am beyond overjoyed for you guys. Getting your little family officially reunited like you all deserve. And him admitting he doesn't just want to co-parent, he wants YOU - doesn't get any sweeter than that!

Make sure you take real good care of yourself now and let him step up on baby duties too. You've got your happy ending, now it's time to fully embrace the bliss of your new life together. I'm so damn proud of you for trusting your intuition and making this happen!

Love you sis, thanks for keeping me posted on all the juicy deets along the way. Wishing you, lover boy and the little bean nothing but the best from here on out ❤️ You freaking did it!

[genericname85]

that's a long story that doesn't speak a word about why he left you in the first place.

[Asker]

It did actually. He got really angry over something small and instead of waiting until he was calm to talk things out, he just flipped out and said he wanted us to separate. It was shocking and hurtful, but I only made one mistake of begging that first night. I cried and begged him not to make that decision, but I did let him go. Since then, I've redeemed myself and have not done any pestering, begging, etc.

Until he requested that I start reaching out first (which was an odd request), I hadn't even been speaking to him until he reached out to ask how an appointment went. Then I'd give a brief run down and then drop the conversation. He's been getting more chatty now and keeps saying how he wants me and the baby to be ok during birth and stuff.

[genericname85]

you still didn't tell "why" he left you in the first place. you just told "what he did" when you broke up.

[Asker]

I suspect he may have been stressing over the approaching due date and simply ran out due to his fear about becoming a dad. Not a good choice, but one I understand and would forgive. If he'd want to talk things out and get back together, I would agree. I'd like nothing more than for us to be a true family again and stay under one roof.

[Asker]

He was really mad at me for the last couple days leading up to the split because I didn't agree with a decision he was making (I strictly disagreed due to the timing with the baby coming and explained that). He got really mad and just would not listen to a word I had to say and wouldn't compromise. So he stayed mad, yelled at me a lot and ended up saying I just want to separate. It was a lot of unnecessary anger on his part.

[genericname85]

well you "suspect"... for me that wouldn't be good enough. would you tell me more about that decision that you disagreed on due to the due date?

[Asker]

He was wanting to change positions with work and the new position would screw us as far as the baby goes. He'd not be allowed to go to any of the remaining appointments and he wouldn't be allowed any time off with me and the baby after the birth. So I was less than thrilled. I gave my reasons calmly and let him know why I didn't think he should change until AFTER we had the baby. He basically had zero regard for my feelings, still went with it and got really mad at me for even disagreeing in the first place.

It was proven true. He hasn't been allowed to attend any appointments and they're still saying nope to time off after the birth.

I'd be willing to forgive him, though I do think that was a bit disrespectful to consider a change like that at work, knowing we had all this stuff to plan and do together.

I just don't know if he is starting to reconsider things or what. Some of the behavior and things he says seems a little unnecessary if you're just reaching out to be civil for the baby, but not really interested in the other parent anymore. I was looking for opinions on that and why his behavior would change like I described.

[genericname85]

well how do your finances look. does him having that other new position provide considerably more disposable income for your household?

[Asker]

No, it didn't honestly. It really didn't come with any sort of pay increase. I told him it would make much more sense to just wait until after the baby was born if he wanted to try the new position to see how it went. AFTER the birth simply because of those ridiculous rules of no time off and no attending appointments. I told him how important it was for him to be home with us for a bit once I have the baby but he just didn't seem to realize that.

[genericname85]

ok. so all i hear you say is basically shitting on your guys choice. like from what you're saying it just doesn't make sense. i don't understand why he wanted to make that choice but it's obvious you don't either. people generally do not make choices that make no sense. so i'm not willing to believe that he's a person that makes irrational decisions like that. so if you want any chance of that relationship possibly ever working out again, you should probably make an effort to get it.

and if you are right and he is an irrational decision maker, then why the fuck would you want him back?

[Asker]

I have no idea why he'd make the choice he did. It was out of character because he was so set on being there for us. It was confusing and I tried to reason with him as to why I preferred he wait to change until after our child arrives. He just went with it anyhow. I asked the pay increase and stuff and when there was none, I said definitely wait because why do it now when it prevents you from being a part of the final moments?

[genericname85]

Well ok. But if he's the type who makes erratic, nonsensical decisions, why take him back?

[Asker]

I'm really torn about what to do. Like yeah I love him and I'd love for us to be a true family, but I do have concerns with the anger and the insane, spur of the moment decisions like that.

[genericname85]

You need to understand him. You won't get around that. Gotta talk about it

[Asker]

I'd love to talk everything out, but I'm not sure how he would feel about doing so.

[genericname85]

It doesn't really matter at this point right. There's the obligation of that child you have together. You gotta figure that out either way

[Asker]

I know we will be co-parenting regardless. I have no intention of keeping him from his child unless he gives me very adequate reason to do so. I'm still having him with me when the baby arrives as well.

[genericname85]

that's something.

[Asker]

Yeah I'd never keep him from his kid. I hate when girls (or even guys) do that without reason. Until he proves he is not fit, he is just as able to be with the child as I am. I'd be pretty sad if he didn't want to be there for the birth. I'm glad he still does and keeps making sure I know that.

[Anonymous]

Change takes time. It doesn’t happen in days or weeks, maybe in an ideal world. As your baby daddy, he will be attached to you for the rest of your life in some way, shape or form. You are the one who decides how that is gonna go, and right now it’s not off to a great start. You love him more than you love your own boundaries, standards and morals. There no repercussions for bad behavior and you excuse a lot of it.

[Asker]

I understand the anger would have to be addressed. That is one thing I'll say - he does have a temper. So yes, I'd want him to address that for sure. Yes, we will always been connected because we share a child together. The child was planned and agreed upon 100% and he was extremely excited when I got a positive test. He had been very actively involved and went to all appointments with me. Then when he left me, no. He didn't go to appointments anymore because he couldn't due to work.

I'm just a little confused by the behavior changes I'm seeing now. I was wondering if he may very well be considering a reconnection based off what he's said lately and was wondering what others thought about it.

[Opinion Owner]

The behavior could’ve been there all along, you either didn’t see it or saw it but thought better of it for one reason or another. For things like anger, mental health issues, etc, I’d say he needs professional help. But there is no 180 here, he’s still the same person within a month; I guess that’s all I’m really saying.

[Asker]

Well, when we first separated, we stayed brief. I never even spoke to him until he reached out to me for an update. Then, he started asking me to text him first and started to be more chatty than what I would deem necessary. I mean if you're just reaching out out of courtesy due to the baby also being yours, I don't really see why you'd have to make comments like let me know if you need anything, sorry you aren't feeling good, etc.

[Opinion Owner]

If I were you I wouldn’t have engaged outside of talking about the baby. At least at first. I’m sure you’d rather move past all this and reconcile but ask yourself this: what sort of future are you setting up for yourself? I don't know what the argument was but from the looks of it he needs to say sorry, and I believe he knows that because of how he’s handling it. The safe approach first, asking about only the baby, then slowly trying to shift things back to normal. If he says or does enough nice things, makes you feel good enough (key word here being “enough”), then this will all be over like it never happened.

Well, it did happen, and it’ll keep happening so long as you let him get away with being an asshole and there’s no repercussions out of fear of losing him. I mean it’s almost like he gets a reward, not the doghouse, you’re the one begging and correcting yourself to be better for a man who may not even deserve it. Is that what you’d like to do each time this happens? Go right back to normalcy and silencing yourself more each time? To me, that sucks.

[Asker]

That makes sense and I appreciate the insight. I'd have to know we were for sure going to be ok and he wasn't going to do something like this again if I did decide to take him back.

He has never apologized and yes, an apology would be very appreciated and I believe that is necessary. Right now, I am being cautious. I'm talking, but I'm still keeping my guard up because I'm not sure what exactly is up at the moment.

[DishLady]

Who cares if he's "changing"? It's temporary... it's a trap to get a better deal off you or to manipulate you... Don't do it.

[Asker]

I definitely have my guard up. Yeah I love him, but I have concerns too. I was wondering if this sounds like he may be starting to attempt to weasel back in. I'd really have to think about that before I decided something. He'd have a lot of stuff to prove.