Apologize without feeling needy?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend and I broke up a week ago. He asked for no contact a month ago. After 3 weeks of no contact, I called and asked him but he seemed to give the vibe that he is not interested anymore. I was mad because I feel like he didn’t care about me even though I posted sorry that I’m in hospital and also I saw he Facebook post posting half joking like he is single. He said sorry about those stuffs but when I asked him how he felt during the time he said he had peace and don’t think relationship can be improved. So I said then we should break up right away. He acted surprised and asked me if I’m sure but then later at night he texted that he is sorry for us and wish my dad well.

2 days later, I called him and asked why he acted surprised but he said just because we broke up before due date. It sounds weird to me. He said it’s enough between us.

During this time, I reflected a lot. I know I contributed to how things sudden changes. I wasn’t in my best self when dealing with stress. I didn’t fight with him but emotionally distant. I only realized how much I love him after we really broke up. I regret but I feel like he didn’t want to try despite my attempt. I wanted to apologize to him but I’m afraid he is taking the wrong way and we can’t even be friend or I come out as needy. Please help! It’s hard for me even to start conversation now after 1 week. Would that be bothering him?

[BadApple69]

Sometimes you need to know when it’s time to just walk away.
If he was majorly in love with you and you had a fight, or 2 or 3. He would still want to make it right with you. It sounds to me that he was on the way out already and the stress you were having was just the straw that broke the camels back.


Walk away.
Good luck!

[Asker]

I still love him. Or maybe I only realized I love him after losing him. He did try to hold us but at one point then he suddenly asked for break. We are in long distance. I am asking him to come meet but he has complication. I think there’s what make me feel like he didn’t want to make efforts. But from another perspective, I know we all have problems we are fighting for. And to measure it based on someone can come or not might not be fair.

[BadApple69]

Long distance relationships are hard to begin with… all relationships need touch for each other, I don’t mean sex (but that’s important too) a hug, holding hands, a kiss… with out this you only have conversation. And that you can have with anyone.
Think of this… he is having a conversation with you, but a girl at work he has a conversation with touches his arm while she speaks…. She is already giving him more than you can give him. LDRs are mostly impossible.
I think you are fighting an up hill battle. Again I suggest you cut your losses, learn from this and walk away.
Hey… if you want to discuss this more let me know… I’ve been in this very situation too.

[jojouzumaki]

From what you had shared. I believe he’s trying to figure things out when he asked a month of no contact. He still try his best to be nice to you regardless of knowing things aren’t not working out. And there you go… you broke up with him as he reminded you that you did break up before due date (it won’t hurt less on your part).


If I were on your shoes, I’ll definitely thank him and let him go. Then redirect on focussing on myself to be a better person and learned from the lessons of the past.

[Asker]

We were good until I asked him to come and meet me at our home country. And out of nowhere he is asking this. It kinda trigger me thinking he is not making effort.

[jojouzumaki]

Let him go as you set yourself free as well

[Jmmmfi4]

SOUNDS LIKE he's ALREADY CHECKED OUT