When is an apology not enough?

Question

Vesuvius87 · Accepted Answer

These are the reasons I can think of that an apology wouldn't be enough:

- It's a repeated offense and it's not followed by actions

- It depends on the nature of the nature and how serious it was. If it's something that will cause permanent, irreparable damage don't try apologizing. In that case just get out of my life for good.

- If you're only sorry you're caught or are about to get in trouble with a higher authority. That reminds me of bullies apologizing because they're about to get suspended and not because they mean it.

- If it's an apology that had to be demanded like in the 2010 You Again movie. The character never get a true, heartfelt apology. It was forced and demanded. In that case I'd rather get no apology than a forced, insincere one. It doubles the offense.

emeraldsaphire · Accepted Answer

An apology is just a promise of change. Everyone makes mistakes and we all learn and become better people. When you say sorry you are promising that you will learn and grow. If a person needs to fix something and they don't even attempt too, or they keep making the same mistake over and over again, it's not that the apology wasn't enough, it's that it was insincere.

Regardless of if an apology is sincere or not, you don't need to stay friends. You don't owe them anything and they don't owe you anything. You can cut ties from anyone for any reason.

Summeroflove · Accepted Answer

Once it gets to that point it’s probably best to start cutting contact with someone as much as possible. I know there are some people you can’t completely cut off but establishing reasonable and healthy boundaries is important.

It’s best to forgive them though not holding negative feelings inside forever. It does take time to work through those feelings and you’re allowed to have them. But there comes a point where it’s time to let it go because being angry at someone who at best doesn’t care how you feel and at worst takes pleasure in it. Only hurts you more in the end and it hurts them when they loose all control over someone.

If a apology is vague. Backhanded I’m sorry BUT…. They apologize but keep doing it. It was something major. When the damage is done.

OlderAndWiser · Accepted Answer

An apology is NEVER enough. If you do something that hurts someone, you need to take actions to minimize or undo the harm, if at all possible. If you engage in actions which cannot be reversed or ameliorated, then an apology is inadequate. There are things which simply can't be fixed.

DishLady · Answer

1. When it's either vague or insincere... there's no true repentance there.
2. When it's for something the person will continue doing... there's no end to the toxic cycle.
3. When it's for something that can't be corrected... the damage is done.

HawkPerception · Answer

Depends on what you can't consider unforgivable. That line is different for everyone.

naartjie · Answer

Honestly, for me, there are some things that I couldn’t accept an apology for because there’s things I’d just never do to someone so for them to do it to me, yeah no. It would show how much they actually care about me.
Usually I can be forgiving with smaller things and usually after a few times when I see there is just no change then they just don’t actually care and it’s not worth my time anymore.

KITEinStorm · Answer

An apology won't work unless you can convince me that you won't do it again.

Or if you have caused material damage, you cannot get rid of it with just an apology.

If you have made apologizing a habit or if you are not sincere...

Spencer10 · Answer

When the action deserves a more significant consequence. Murder for example... no apology will be enough. In a relationship a major breach of trust is another example. I think ultimately its up to the hurt party to decide what is acceptable.

Catalon · Answer

An apology isn’t enough when it’s not backed by actions. Words can be easy, but real change is what truly matters. If someone keeps repeating the same mistake, the apology loses its meaning. I believe that sincerity, accountability, and effort to make things right are what really count. What do you think? Can you forgive someone if their actions don’t change?

PrincessC16 · Answer

When cheating occurs. Or when you have severally hurt someone.

Account · Answer

When the action that is done cannot be repaired under no circumstances. Also, when it feels insincere.

EzraIsShy76028 · Answer

When they screwed up so bad that everything or anything they say just simply can't make up for all the hurt and pain they caused you.

Makeushiver · Answer

When it's the same apology about the same behavior. Some things like abuse re examples of something that I've never seen get better. In fact it almost always gets worse

Agape93 · Answer

Apologies mean nothing to me, 9/10 its either a lie, disingenuous or forced so theyre never sufficient

danielle872024 · Answer

Depends on why the apology , been done like shit by those close they can save the apology. It has to be bad for that phrase...

LadyBecks · Answer

If it's not a sincere apology or if it's for a repeated offense

JustinTheGreat · Answer

When it’s a repeated behavior. You can say sorry all you want but how sorry can you be if you continue to break a boundary set in place.

Breanna83727 · Answer

An apology isn’t enough when they continue to do it over and over without change

anmari2001 · Answer

When you eat the last biscuit I wanted it and you know it

Nikki1989 · Answer

Words are meaningless when they come from some people.

Cormac995 · Answer

When they've cheated or broken the trust in a similar way.

Danielle93 · Answer

If they cheat on you, hurt or kill your children or steal from you

DrPepper12 · Answer

When you're ethics or sanity is at the breaking point. If that's the case it's time to end the toxicity.

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

When we are talking red flags and dealbreakers.

dragoblack · Answer

Always rectify with actions when you can. People can say "sorry" , but actions speak louder than words.

The_Kroakie_Frog · Answer

An apology is not enough when the person expressing it doesn’t admit responsibility, show remorse, and make calculated efforts to change the offensive behavior in the future.

Pinay_ako · Answer

When it becomes a habit

YayaArias · Answer

When things were taken too far or if things aren’t gonna change and it’s just being said because they feel like it’s something that needs to be said not because they actually feel it.

KittygosMeoWW · Answer

When I’ve been hurt physically or you’ve put my loved ones in danger

GODBODY954 · Answer

When that person ignores you trying to make things better

Finchie40 · Answer

Only you can determine that

Smegskull · Answer

when it comes from a hypocrit, a narcissist or an idiot.

nawtee_me · Answer

If it is the second time and there wouldn’t be a third time.

dustybiker2 · Answer

Some things are unforgivable.

Purpleronnie · Answer

I’m sorry you have to ask ……. 😝🤓

itsannalee · Answer

When they break the trust

GrinchyTsy · Answer

When they play the victim.

SleepingHazard · Answer

When the action doesn't change.

beebella · Answer

When trust is broken.

ienjoylookingatgreen · Answer

When someone ends up like you

PrettyCrumblBb · Answer

When you rob a bank.

DeeDeeDeVour · Answer

Cheating!

Rena90 · Answer

When they cheat, or do something to kids.

UknowJT93 · Answer

until she isn't smile maybe

When is an apology not enough?

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When is an apology not enough?

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