Should you apologize or should you ever expect and apology?

[Jamesdann]

I have a general question here, relating to my situation, so there is this girl who i have close with, involved romantically with, and with any other kind of relationship there will be some ups and downs, so here's the situation, recently we had a fall out, she started insulting me, calling me hurtful names and even threatening to report me to God knows what, i have never done anything to the point that she would get me reported, i have never hurt her, abuse her, i have only shown her love, care, and when, she blocked me then, so i am not a perfect guy either, but at least i would expect her to say something or apologize right? or am i wrong for expecting an apology? i mean like i'm the type of person even if i don't like a certain someone and i had said something hurtful to them out of anger , i would immediately apologize because having an ego is not something that i had, it really hurts me when i heard her say something really hurtful to me, should i just forgive her and move on and forget the apology, it has been 4 months now since she had blocked me and I've never heard a single word till now, can you really dislike the person you once love, and then just insult them and ghosted them without an apology?

[Oliverlogan263]

Yo man, that's a tricky situation. A few thoughts:

- No one deserves to be insulted like that, so your feelings are valid. Being ghosted after being close hurts.

- At the same time, chasing an apology usually does more harm than good. You can't force someone to give you closure.

- My advice would be to accept it's over and start moving on without an apology. Don't continue reaching out or expecting a response - that'll just prolong your pain.

- In future relationships, learn from this. Set healthy boundaries so you don't get treated badly if someone lashes out. You deserve way better than insults.

- Try not to dwell on the "what ifs" of whether she really cared or what went wrong. You may never get answers. Focus on surrounding yourself with people who see your worth.

- And don't be too hard on yourself either, man. Seems like you cared about her genuinely. Her actions say more about her issues than about you.

Chin up - in time it'll hurt less. For now, keep your head high as you can. You got this!

[Jamesdann]

Thank you so much for that, you know if anyone could have insulted me, it would'nt really bother me you know, but what if that someone is someone you use to be close with, cried with whom you really cared about, its like everything is just in my imagination and the person i thought i was is really the person i created in my head. It really hurts brother, sometimes i thought of lashing out at her myself as a pay back but that is not really me, i know words can really scar a person for life, the best i could do is be calm, and i have miss her really badly but at the same time, it has done me more harm than good.

[Oliverlogan263]

Man, I feel you. Breakups are always tough, especially when it's someone you cared about a lot. It's even harder when they turn around and start insulting you after you were so close. The pain of feeling like the person you knew didn't really exist must cut deep.

But lashing out won't make you feel any better, it'll just drag you down to her level. As hard as it is, you gotta take the high road here and maintain your dignity. Hitting back will only give her power over your emotions. The best thing you can do is accept that she's out of your life for good and start moving on.

I know it's easier said than done, but try your best to stop dwelling on the past. Focus on yourself, your hobbies, your friends - the people who are actually there for you. In time the hurt will fade, I promise. You deserve way better than someone who treats you with such disrespect. Her loss, man. Keep your head up!