Ex keeps asking me for money?

[Anonymous]

My ex keeps asking me for money. He is a disabled veteran and does not work. I met him in my 20’s and when I was young and naive. I needed a place to stay and moved in with him for 8 months. I went 50/50 and paid half of the rent. Then I got my own place and started establishing myself within my career. I broke it off with him when I turned 30 because I wanted to get married and he said he didn’t because he would lose his SSI checks and disability checks.

Now that I am older and more established in my career I am looking for someone that can match my salary or more. I want to buy a house one day. I also see my ex for what he is a loser and a bum. I tried to cut contact with him but he will call me on a different social media app. Part of me feel bad because he did help me out by letting me move in with him but I still had savings and 3 jobs when I moved in with him.

Recently he asked me to buy him food because he lost his ebt card. I took him grocery shopping and to a pizza place to eat food and also to Starbucks. Just cause he has helped me with food in the past.

I regret helping him because now he has started asking me for help buying things for him everyday. Recently, he has asked me to pay his rent, utilities, food, beer cigarettes, he has asked me to give him my spare phone (for free) because his is broken, he has came over to my house to wash his laundry and expected me to do it for him which I refused. He asked me donate to his son’s gofundme and his kid is an adult now.

How do I get rid of this leech?

[HollyK21]

Just stop answering his calls. You already know he’s calling from different apps so when you see a weird number pop up, ignore it. If it’s someone other than him and it’s important they will leave a voicemail. You can also just be transparent and tell him to stop asking you for stuff, there’s nothing to feel bad about you’ve done more than enough and don’t owe him any more.

[XXblack88]

If he's a disabled vet he qualified for the VA. also while I thank it's nice you helped him with food I'm pretty sure beer and cigarettes aren't food related not to mention there are plenty of food banks around the USA he can get food from. IK some people have their pride too high and would rather asked a friend/ family etc. but sometimes we don't have much choice. If he calls you don't pick it up. I personally wouldn't help him with anything besides getting hook up with the VA if he's not already.

[Zionne]

You need firm boundaries and consistency. Stop giving him money or doing favors, block or mute him if he keeps reaching out, and make it clear that the help you gave in the past doesn’t create ongoing obligations. Compassion is fine, but enabling him is hurting you more than helping him.

[Anonymous]

Stop doing him any favors him

[Anonymous]

Stop giving him money and block his number

[slatyb]

Block him.