So my ex dumped me after almost a year of dating because she said she never loved. I tried to get her back and she said no. I was pretty hurt and sad by the whole thing. We are in the same social circle so I went NC for a about 2 months. When I next saw her at funtion with mutual friends, it was awkward but cordial enough. I was secretly hoping for a sign of reconciliation, but when I saw none, I tried as best as could to accept the fact that she and I could be friendly while I could date others.
A month passed and saw my ex again. When I approached her to say hello, she was very cold and rude towards to me. I didn't want to show that it bothered me (although I was hurt), so I smiled and took the high road.
I later found out that some of her friends had told her that I was out dating and otherwise socializing with other women (nothing serious and I was, after all, single). She also told one of my friends that she was taking her time dating again out of respect for me. Did I owe her the same courtesy if I was the one dumped? And, I don't even know if it's ture that she was not dating out of respect for me, or because she simply hadn't met anyone who met her standards.
Any insights? Thanks
Most Helpful Girl
I think that once two people are broken up either can date someone else the next day even if they wanted to. There's no rule book that says you can't date someone new now. If the dumpee does date other people right away after they just have been dumped it may seem like they are just upset so they date anyone. This might not always be the case however. I'm not sure if your ex-girflfriend is telling the truth or not but if she is then I think in other words she won't date anyone else yet because you did mean something to her at least and even though she dumped you she needs time to think about what she really wants in a man.
Once you've been dumped or you dumped someone else you shouldn't care what your ex thinks because you guys are done and that's that. Its more a matter of how upset you are over the person. If your ex really did matter to you then it probably would take longer till you become interested in dating again. If they didn't matter to you that much then its a lot easier to date again. Look at it this way, lets say you ask a girl out and you go out on about 3 or 4 dates and decide she's not for me, are you torn up over it, no because you only been out with this girl a few times barely to even know her middle name, so you probably will just go out on a date again with a girl you meet that you might like like as if you never even met the other girl. On the other hand if you've been going out with a girl for more like 3 years and were absolutely in love and one day you just broke up, then most of the time both people would probably not date someone else for a long long time. Its not really out of a courtesy or respect to the other person, its just a matter of how long it takes to get over someone no matter if your the dumpee of the dumper. People are selfish and that's how the world works. No one is going to act a certain way in order to respect someone else. Your ex just means that she's still taking her time getting over you (even though she dumped you, it takes time) and is thinking about what she wants in a man or she hasn't found someone else yet that meets her standards. Trust met its not about her caring about you, its about her. Go enjoy yourself and date girls, there's nothing wrong with that. To be honest my last boyfriend broke up with me and he has a new girlfriend now, and I wish I got a new boyfriend before he did just to show him up. You should be happy your getting girls before she's getting any, she might just be jealous as well.0