In this day and age all of us have the whole world at our finger tips through the internet. We can travel to Africa to run with lions, we can look into the past, or we can even view the entire Earth at once, all with a click here and a tap of the keyboard there. Likewise, the internet allows us to connect with people miles from us, where they be in another city, another state, or an entirely different country all the way across the world. This can lead to some amazing friendships, or even deeper than that, eclusive online relationships. It's hard to accomplish, but I'm willing to share a few tips on how I keep a relationship going with my boyfriend in Tennessee all the way from Maryland.
1.) Be sure that the relationship is worth it.
Long distance relationships are incredibly hard to pull off. It requires lots of time and effort, and feelings can change with just the snap of a finger or the click of a button. These relationships can make you sad, depressed even, and can cause a lot of emotional pain and stress if you aren't a very mentally stable and self reliant person. You need to be completely sure that your long distance partner is compatible with you and that they're someone you're willing to work for who will work for you just as hard.
2.) Have a goal.
You wouldn't want to work and work if there is no change or benefit on anyone's part, would you? Likewise, you don't want to start a long distance relationship without some kind of goal you both plan on working up to. Like I said before, ldrs require a lot of effort on the part of both people involved. As an example, my boyfriend and I have plans set up to meet irl for the first time this summer when I'm with my mom. She only likes a few hours from him, so that meeting will be a milestone in our relationship. We've already discussed living arrangements for after I graduate highschool, and we've come up with a financially sound plan to get us together and working as a team. You don't need such specific plans, but be sure you both agree on what you want and you both plan on working to get to a certain point.
3.) Talk often.
A relationship doesn't work if you have no idea on what's happening in eachother's lives. You need to talk often, even if it can't be every day. Have serious conversations about what's happening in both of your lives. You may even find that you have strong emotional support if you're going through something, annd your partner may need you for that reason also. Be sure that the relationship isn't all just 'I love you's and 'you're adorable's. I promise you that you'll get tired of it (or your partner will) and it will end in tears and lots of wasted time.
4.) Skype is your best friend.
You don't need to Skype nearly as often as you should message eachother, but it is a large helper when it comes to communication. You'll be so happy to see a solid face on the other side of the screen that loves you and cares for you. Seeing a person can make the relationship seem so much more realistic. I try to use Skype at LEAST once a month, once every couple weeks if possible due to school and work that keeps us both too busy some of the time.
5.) Trust your partner, and give them reason to trust you.
I gaurantee that if you don't trust your partner, there is abolutely no way in hell that you;ll enjoy being with them for long. You'll be sad and alone, afraid that they're off with someone else of whatever else you may think if you lack trust for them. That isn't a healthy way to go about things, and long distance couples have a harder time being able to reassure eachother of their loyalty. You have to build a solid relationship oof mutual trust and respect in order to prosper.
6.) Love, and allow yourself to be loved.
Pushing people away isn't healthy, whether it be long distance or in person. If you put yourself down often or you distance yourself from your long distance boyfriend/girlfriend, you're only deepening the divide that already stands between the two of you. That's not a road you want to go down, so if you plan on having a ldr you need to learn to love someone else and allow someont to love you, flaws and all.
7.) Be yourself!
Your partner can't see you as you are in the real world, they can only see what you show them. This is an issue for those with lower self confidence such as myself, because we tend to find angles and lighting to mask our true forms. I angle the camera to look slimmer than I really am, but that's not a good thing to send to the boyfriend/girlfriend often. What happens when you meet in person and you're finding a different face than you expect? You panic. Try to avoid this panic by showing a person who you truly are, inside and outside. Don't try to make yourself more cute over text or make your pictures more edited than you care to admit, because this will lead to a very bad situation when it comes time to meet up face to face.
Now that you have a couple of little tips, go out there and love your partner, whether they be online or face to face. Hope this helped at all!
Most Helpful Opinions