I Settled for a Sh*tty Guy & Lost Big Time!

I Settled for a Sh*tty Guy & Lost Big Time!

I was dating Daniel for about 4 months, when he asked me to move in with him. Although I was young, I felt like he was a nice guy, and truly cared about me. Things were going OK, up until Daniel lost his job. I had a pretty stable job so I had no issue paying rent and the bills... but when a month went by and Daniel wasn't even trying to look for a job- I began to get agitated.

I told Daniel that it is hard for me to support 2 people, and that it really isn't fair that I have all of the financial burden. Daniel promised me that he would send out resumes and try to find a job... 3 weeks later nothing. Not even an attempt on his end.

We began to fight over bills, expenses, food, laundry. Everything became an issue. It got to the point where Daniel saw me as his mom taking care of him, and he had lost respect for me because I was so accommodating. I was feeling super low, and Daniel's constant talking down upon me, really didn't help the situation.

A month later, I told Daniel that I am moving out. He was frantically trying to get back together and promising me the stars, but I got my things and moved out, anyways. He continued to call and call, but I wasn't having any of it. I was hurt and that was that.

Luckily about 2 weeks into our breakup, I met Howard. Howard was 10 years older, super mature, charming and certainly a catch. He was attentive, and made me feel like a special person. Howard and I were starting to see more and more of each other, and I was liking him more and more.

But there was just one issue, Daniel was messaging and sending flowers and doing everything he could to win me back. He even found a job and asked me to dinner. Although I knew I should have been ignoring Daniel, I did the stupid thing I shouldn't have, and agreed to see him.

When I arrived, Daniel had flowers in his hand, and looked like he had spent an hour preparing for this meal with me. He gave me a hug and told me how much he misses me, and that he has a new job and wants to start fresh. He reached out and gave me a key to our former home together, and asked that I move back in. I was extremely hesitant, but the tears building up in his eyes made me feel like it was the Daniel that I had known when we first met.

I told Howard that I was attempting to make things work with Daniel, although my gut told me it was a mistake. Nonetheless I moved back in with Daniel, and let things with Howard evaporate. The first month was incredible, and I was so happy we were over our hump, until things resorted back to how they were. I was picking up after Daniel like I was his mother, he relied on me financially yet again after his hours at work were cut, and the stress was put upon us again. After another 2 months of this, I moved out for good this time.

I had contacted Howard because I had known that I gave up on something with great potential, but Howard had let me know that he is seeing someone else, and that they were getting serious. I often think about how I let a good guy go, over someone that I knew I shouldn't have settled for. I guess it's a good lesson.


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What Guys Said 2

  • Being single isn't this BAD thing. As you learned, far better than settling and being unhappy. Be happy with yourself and your life, don't focus on finding a guy or being single.

  • Just do like I do and stay unattached, it's awesome.


What Girls Said 1

  • Thanks for sharing. It teaches the rest of us a good lesson as well.


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