If You Think Dating Sucks, Try Being in a Young Adult Church Group That Only Couples Up

[Anonymous]

With this group there is no try, you either do or you do not become a couple. There is no get to know you coffee or lunch outing. Dating is taken so seriously and because of that the women take everything personally and overreact. Because for some reason they believe that dating must lead to marriage and dating for fun is unacceptable. None of the girls think "oh he asked me out, how nice, I'm flattered some one liked me enough to try asking me out." They think "ew why would he want to marry me I don't like him that way at all." They are not afraid to show you that either. They won't tell you that yet they won't give you a "NO" either. Just weird face and constant avoidance, or they just ignore your advances.

If you are lucky enough to find a girl that likes you and you both start dating, then usually she will be way too clingy and overthink and worry about every move you make or don't make. Like most women, these ladies have it all planned out. How the guy who loves them looks like, how he acts, how he won't act... If you fail to meet her image of how things should go, look out. I'm always hearing complaints from my guy friends about how his girlfriend always assumes he should be doing something for her at a certain time and in a certain way. My female friends are always complaining about how he did not do this right or do it enough for them. Why does he not call enough?...

With dating elsewhere you do often get these things also but not nearly to this extent. Also with online dating everything is so impersonal and if you don't match with someone you do not have to ever see them again. At church if things do not work out, the couple behaves like a divorced couple always avoiding each other, or putting down the other, or very rarely they manage to go back to being friends.

So what are your dating woes, or if your in a coupling environment what is your advice to others?

[loveArt1983]

Does that really work? I mean I never tried it but questioning wether it help me in my situation...

[myTake Owner]

Will what work? Basically your making friends with all of the girls and hoping that one let's you know that she likes you or you just risk offending a girl and killing a friend ship by asking her out.

[loveArt1983]

Seems like trapezoid or one those octagon relationship eight girls you want to ask girl with pretty bow on her head but she could snoring person but options are other seven girls might give options too, kind reminds me of bachelor? asking her out in old traditional way you ask her folks if you date her first. I never tried going to this adult church groups? I like to try really if there like art seminar I like to go to one... but they don't have one.

[zagor]

You go to a strange church.

[Iraqveteran666]

Sounds more like a cult than church group. My advice is to not drink the cool aid.

[myTake Owner]

It is more of a unspoken social thing. We are all adults and we act how we want to act but there are always social rules.

[Iraqveteran666]

And your leader approves of these relationships?

[myTake Owner]

The leader stays out of our interpersonal lives unless asked but if a couple get serious he sends them over to the marriage counseling Pastors to talk about things. We are all 18+ though the first picture does looks like the people in it are teens.