Good things come to those who wait..."
With about 7.5 billion people in the world it's hard to find the right "one". Nowadays it seems as though finding the right fit is like finding a needle in a haystack. Let alone a loyal, decent human being. There are so many good people out there, but they are all pretty much looked over or used and beaten down emotionally leading to trust issues. We've all been there, you are not alone. After years of being treated as though I was an object and if I didn't give them what they wanted I was useless.I found the love of my life. I'm so thankful looking back that I didn't give in. Not only are women being treated like objects, but so are men. I, unfortunately know a family member who constantly uses men for alcohol or money. It has gotten to the point where when I see her I would like to throw up. So here are my tips on finding the right one. How I pulled myself out of crappy relationships and flourished into a beautiful one.
1. The first move
many people believe that men have to make the first move. Women if you see someone interesting you make a move too. This gives you strength in the relationship if one is developed. It proves that we are not too weak to say what we want.
I messaged my future husband a while back and it lead up to us dating and falling madly in love with each other.
2. Stand up for yourself
Meet one who is not over protective, but protective enough where if you don't stick up for yourself he will. Overprotective is not the way too be because it gives women or men the feeling as though they are not strong enough. My man will give me some time to stick up for myself, but if I don't he certainly will have his word with doesn't matter who.
3. Want kids? Be sure that they not only want kids, but would be a great parent.
Going from dating one guy who has a kid, but frankly ignores them to one who doesn't have one (yet ;)) who treats any kid as though they are their own. My little brother is 10 years old. My boyfriend and him have a good bond. There is nothing better than seeing a brother-like friendship between your man and your little brother who means so dearly too you. My brother looks at my man as his older brother and my man looks at my brother as he was his little brother. They get along great! If he or she treats kids very kindly (of course in the non-creeper way). There is definitely a green flag! :)
4. Watch how he or she treats her parents/siblings!
They always say a man who treats his sister and mother with respect will treat you with respect. If you date someone who treats their mom or sister like crap, but you look at it as though, "well he loves me and treats me right". What do you think will happen down the road when you get a little too comfortable? Vice versa with girls and their fathers and brothers.
5. There is no such thing as a good relationship that's NOT loyal!
Once a cheater, always a cheater. Watch them sometimes when you are in a room full of the opposite gender of yours. If they eye up any other men or woman in a dirty way, run. If they explain to you that yes they did cheat once, but it'll "never" happen again! Don't believe it. I know a lot of girls who flirted with taken guys who then broke up with their girlfriend for them. I say to them, "so you don't think they will do the same thing to you once they get bored? or if another woman walked into the room that crossed their eyes? There is no greater feeling than knowing for a fact that they won't cheat on you. With no trust, relationships simply do NOT work! If they have to check your phone all the time...run! They don't trust you enough and it's not fair to either of you if you're cheating or not.
6. When a man walks on the outside of the sidewalk...
When a man switches spots with a woman who is walking on the street he takes the outside, towards the road. When he does this it shows that "hey, if a freak accident would happen I'm taking the fall! I will protect you". I once dated a boy ( i don't consider him a man) he asked me "so when are you going to leave?" I said I had no where to go that night, meaning I had to sleep in my car. He told me okay then go do that then. another time he told me I could walk home....I was the driver and I needed help with something. He was a horrible boyfriend!
7. Men need pampered too...
A man who opens doors, moves things out of the way for you, picks up heavy articles for you and just plainly does things out of his way for you is a keeper! Guys, look for girls who will offer to help or just does it for you without you saying anything. The relationship is a two way street. Men need pampered too! Make him a nice dinner, bake him a delicious dessert. Show him you care and love him! Do something special for his birthday or just a random day for a surprise.
8. Similarities and the differences
Pick someone you have things in common, but you are not exactly the same. Learning new things like learning how to kayak or camp is a nice bonding experience and you may find something you like to do that you didn't know you would enjoy. My boyfriend and I are different in what we like to do, well we were. He taught me archery which I absolutely love and I taught him how to sew which helped him with making things for hunting and more. Remember the more you are with them the more you end up like them. We picked up each others good habits and behaviors by spending endless amount of time together.
9. If you spend a lot of time together and you don't get tired of them...
imagine being married, but hate spending so much time together? what kind of relationship is that? I spend every day with my boyfriend and we can't get enough of each other. We have been together for a long time and you can't separate us. we are glued at the hip! Be with someone you can't stand being without.
10. They tell you, " I love you for you"
Can you say keeper! Marry them! I'm fit and active but put on a few pounds just like everyone else. I would tell him how I hated my figure and his response was priceless. "You haven't gained weight and even if you did I wouldn't love you any less. You could put on a thousand pounds and I'd still love you and find you beautiful". Meet a guy or girl who treats you like that...keep them!
Those are ten simple ways to treat someone, and find the right one for you! Hope you enjoy and find the love of your life!