2 mo

*sigh* Sometimes I wish I was gay!

*sigh* Sometimes I wish I was gay!

Dating these days feels very unjust. But both genders say so.

Relationships are a normal desire in humans. But sometimes things are out of reach or are seemingly not even meant to be.

I am not going to repeat after Elliot Rodger or the incel members. However it will be difficult to do so without looking like one and there is no easy way of putting this here. So approach this article with a rather open mind. Thank you in advance.

I love women. I am thankful that they are on earth and that we coexist usually in peace. Many women are beautiful and kind and have a soothing voice and a soft, pleasant skin and all that and pretty much the opposite of what we men are.

Dating them however proves to be a challenge.

You could be that guy, who got rejected and rejection after rejection you wonder if there's something wrong with you. Are you ugly? Too rough? Too nice? Do your clothes smell weird? Did you say something wrong?

Or whether women even want relationships in general.

Or that suddenly they became robots.

Or that they turned lesbian.

Or anything in general, really.

On the other hand there are some ridiculous standards that quite some women have.

Who cares about personality when you can demand standards, that most men can't fit in even if they wanted to? Tall like a tree, strong like a hulk, wealthy like a businessman and even specific zodiac signs!!! Yes, you heard that right! ZODIAC SIGNS!!!

I won't settle for anything less. I deserve the best!

This is also one of the (leading?) reasons of the decline in relationships. I'm not blaming anyone but the increase in this philosophy being the decline in relationships is a fact. And facts do not care how you view, accept or decline them.

*sigh* Sometimes I wish I was gay!

The knight in shining armor may very well not exist at all. They were for the most parts filmed in scripted movies. This is no different from certain men taking porn as an example of what their expectations in sex will be.

*sigh* Sometimes I wish I was gay!

Make no mistake as it is not a secret. Rich men get the honeybees with little effort while we - the others - hardly get anything at maximum effort. It can be observed over and over again. Is that really the most reliable way to do it?

Finding matches on POF, Badoo, HotOrNot has not yielded results for me or my pals.

Homosexuals

I do wonder how successful dating for homosexuals actually is on the contrary of traditional heterosexual couples.

If I was gay I could go and try grindr so I could see it for myself. But I also don't want to set up a show either because... well I'm simply not gay! I also do not know anyone, who is either gay or bisexual.


Girlfriend?

I would really love to believe in that and finding love but it became somewhat similar to believing in Santa Claus.

It seems too good to be true. A loving woman always being by my side and exchanging affections with me within my arms reach!

*sigh* Sometimes I wish I was gay!

The lonely nights

We can't be the only ones dealing with the lonely nights. Or can we?

The bed and the pillows are the only soft things I come into physical contact with when going to sleep. And if daydreams of being romantic and intimate with a nice lady won't drive me to insomnia due to the lack of such experiences, then the recurring depressions will.

*sigh* Sometimes I wish I was gay!

Again, women are beautiful and nice and all that and I would really look forward of having one by my side. I'd treat her like a queen because I want to be treated like a king.

But at times like these I do wish almost dearly this feeling to fade away and to become gay instead. Then at least I wouldn't deal with the missing part of my love life and can continue living happy - much like children not missing a boyfriend or a girlfriend when they are in elementary school. I can physically feel the expiration at the expense of my own health.

Thanks for reading!

Note: I do not know why GAG forces this topic into Sexuality when it's clearly about Dating.

*sigh* Sometimes I wish I was gay!
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Most Helpful Girls

  • RSong

    I completely understand what you're saying. I feel that way a lot, too. I have often joked about becoming a nun or wishing I were gay instead because finding anyone who wants a serious relationship is akin to searching for a needle in a hay stack. Being in a serious relationship means that both people have to face certain truths about themselves and learn to adapt together.
    I have found that when the going gets tough, most people would rather bail then try and fight for the love and companionship they wanted so badly.
    Thinking about all of that reminds me of a line from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "The hardest thing to do in this world is to live in it. Be brave"
    There is a certain fear concerning intimacy and vulnerability and most choose not to face that fear because they do not view the reward greater than the risk, which is truly sad.

  • Ellie-V

    Umm 😐 if you believe gay people (specifically men) somehow have it easier, you’ve got another thing coming bro.

    Other than that, sorry about your troubles. Don’t give up.

    • Naw I’m bi and dating men is way way way easier, but being gay comes with other challenges like being accepted in society, but comparing ease of getting dates and meeting compatible people being gay is like putting it on easy mode, women are complicated

    • Ellie-V

      Okay

    • @Ellie-V
      Wtf is he talking about?

    • Show All

Most Helpful Guys

  • Wolframium

    *sigh* Sometimes I wish I was asexual. Without emotions and caring.
    Lol. Sometimes. :-D Can you just imagine, how easier it all would be?
    Lonely? Who cares? :-) No girlfriend and ugly AF? Who cares? :-) It doesn't matter. It has the same value as random rock to me.
    I wish…

    • Anonymous

      You and me both!
      I remember being in Kindergarten and in Elementary school. Girls were literally invisible to me and out of my mind and I was not missing anything from them.

    • Anonymous

      Well, not literally but figuratively 😂

    • Tdieseler

      you dont have to be asexual for that honey.. im hetero... love women and their bodies... but no emotions n caring lol

    • Show All
  • NathanV

    Dating & relationships are ALWAYS tricky no matter your preferences! Even if you like ALLL genders, things are no less complicated! & often times when you give up looking, that's when people want you! (Sure is what happens with me anyway!) Hang in there! You are young!

What Girls & Guys Said

2254
  • MoneyBeets

    The devil is your daddy.

  • Anonymous

    A know a lot of women who say the same thing. ;)

    • Anonymous

      Good to know 😊

  • Anonymous

    I've felt the same. From what I hear the internal dynamics of homosexual males in relationships is relatively good, much easier. There's also things like lower violence iin relationships than heterosexual relationships, the relationship is more stable, good things like that. Meanwhile lesbian relationships having higher rates of violence and such, so it doesn't really go both ways, but I digress.

    Really the issues that homosexual guys face is external to the relationship, but I feel like I could handle people being a bit shitty toward me, especially if I had a partner to lean on. It's not like we don't get shit for being straight as it is. So often the feeling comes up where I feel like if I could just meet a nice boy then this would just make it all easy. Problem is that I don't find them attractive unfortunately. So there's no easy way out. Even entertaining the notion of bi-curiosity as a man is an issue for a solid minority of women. Approximately a third of women will not want anything romantic from a guy with any interest in men and another third say they would date and hook up with but wouldn't consider anything serious. So it doesn't seem worth it to me to bar yourself from 50%+ of the population of women despite their flaws and the roadblocks they set up. We should be critical of failings and try to repair gender relations. Things like high standards and toxic attitudes eed to be addressed.

  • Anonymous

    ewww no lol

  • Anonymous

    Look I don't want to be rude cos I know this is your take but your age is 18-24, I don't think you need to worry too much yet. And at the risk of sounding like an ass, you have to have something to attract a female, not just wishes and good intentions. I'm not talking money or even looks, what I mean is you need to have a life that makes you into an attractive person, for example, would you be more interested in a girl that spends all her time thinking about relationships, watching TV and talking about guys and dating or a girl that has hobbies and activities and generally betters herself?

  • Anonymous

    I have a gay friend, and many gay men are way more picky than straight women. So it's not so easy.

    • Anonymous

      Thanks for letting me know!

  • Anonymous

    It's really a choice. I went through a gay phase but switched back to guys, to much drama with girls lol

    • Lol your under 18, you haven’t been alive long enough to go through a gay phase lol you might have fooled around with a women here and there but a gay phase would be a long term relationship kinda deal with the same sex

  • Anonymous

    Many women would be willing to place less value on looks if a guy has a "great personality" or a high social/economic status. Given that these are two factors within one's control, I'd think men have it easier than women. Many men are NOT willing to put aside a woman's looks, even if the man looks like the bottom of a shoe.

    by the way, Gay men actually place more emphasis on appearance and masculine features (on average) than women, so it may or may not be harder to find mates in that population.

  • Anonymous

    Watch the movie called Love, Simon.
    I didn't expect the movie to be good. But it was a pretty great movie.

  • Anonymous

    I agree, I've thought about this a lot and sometimes I wish I were gay too.

  • Anonymous

    Well I'm bi and decided I wouldn't date anymore cause it's way too much drama

  • Anonymous

    Chances are that u are gay, and are simply suppressing it. Or at least bi. Most men are.

    • He may be but most men aren't gay.

    • sean1234

      This is the kind of thinking why so many people are screwed up today. Instead of seeing men as men and women as women, especially from a biblical standpoint, Husband&Wife living together. A single person sees another person of the opposite sex who is single walking around as gay/bi/whatever instead of normal.

    • Anonymous

      Oh, yes, men and women often become husband and wife living together. It’s just too bad they’re not actually attracted to each other.

    • Show All
  • Anonymous

    I used to feel like that but that's depression. Im glad I don't feel that way. Why aren't you gay yet?

    • Anonymous

      I'm not attracted to men or dicks. It disgusts me.
      I'm extremely attracted to women. I can't change that even if i wanted to.

  • Anonymous

    Find a trans girl who's attractive. They're grateful as hell to be accepted by a straight man, and know exactly how a man thinks. Plus, no need for birth control or putting up with attitude for a week out of every month.

    • Anonymous

      But dicks other than my own are disgusting for me. I don't want a transgender. I want a normal woman.

    • Transsexuals have gone through a lot of surgeries, so a trans woman would have a vagina instead of a penis.

  • Anonymous

    I understand your pain. I do have a standard to who I will date. I will only date nice guys who do not try to push me into sex. I have been given pickup lines galore, I am tired of the everyday dick bags that drool and chase after me. Its old and its hard to find who will actually love you. I get not wanting to sleep alone and to just have a best friend. I think eventually everyone will find that. I think it just takes time.

    • Tdieseler

      Out of all that... the two things that are pretty neutral are the first and last sentences... the rest are just the reason why the dating world ain't shit these days.
      "nice guys who do not try to push me into sex".. seems like thats a thing... she wants the fancy date, the flowers, the ride, but its a crime if he suggests sex...
      "dick bags"... one guy hits on a girl and he's a creep because she is not attracted, but the one she is attracted to hits on her... and oh joy...
      To girls its always about perspective, thats why i hardly ever feel sorry for them when i hear of heartbreak or rejection. Why feel sorry for a selfish personality... they would have done (and do) the same thing in that position.

      Its fine to have a standard... but just to negate all the shit i just said... i dont ask for more than i can give. but girls seem to have a perpetual habit of asking for more... but not giving shit in return. You have a standard... fine... but you think the person you like doesnt?

    • Anonymous

      Actually you are wrong. I do it regardless of the attractiveness of the guy. I dont like being disrespected. Suggesting sex is ok, as long as we are exclusive. The only time anyone will hear me complain about heartache or rejection, is if the long term partner im seeing and I break up.

    • Tdieseler

      first off... thanks for being calm about my little "going off on you" comment... thats how i test people to see if they know what they are talking about or just coming at me... and you stayed on topic. so ima do the same.

      actually, im not wrong... you want exclusivity to do/be a certain way... but what im talking about is BEFORE that. Oh, dont even get me started on the ones who ARE exclusive and wing that shit around like a weapon lol... one of my disclaimers now (well, before i finished the Diesel Dating System) was if i want something from my girl and she denies me... i'll go elsewhere... fuck exclusivity... but the DDS evens that out... eliminates arguments, problems, cheating... pretty much everything wrong with relationships today... and the funny part is... its based on a simple premise that goes back to the B. C's...(no, not big cocks... yeh nasty :) )

    • Show All
  • Anonymous

    If you ever wish that you are gay, you are actually gay just not ready to admit it to yourself

    • zagor

      That is just plain stupid. He is clearly complaining about women's attitudes, not expressing sexual interest in men. You sound like a 5th grader calling someone a fag.

    • Anonymous

      @zagor pretty much that! Nice comparison.

    • Anonymous

      tbh i didn't read the text just commented on title

    • Show All
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