This sad story reminds me, I know a guy who is 'dating' an autistic girl, it's basically taking advantage of a mentally challenged person. He told me he's just using her for sex and practice while looking for a real girlfriend (which might not happen any time soon lol). And when he finds a real girlfriend, the autistic girl will no longer be young, she would hit the wall, and nobody wants to deal with a post wall autistic woman (unless the guy also has some serious baggage like HIV or sth)
I've always felt it's going to be a bigger difficulty for men than for women, since guys are expected to do the heavy lifting in dating and relationships and attraction, seduction, if you get what I'm saying
Autism shouldn't be things which one decide about persone which we meet. People with autism are really cool! They are always true and trust me, they are good people to have
I dated a guy with autism. I didn't have a great experience but I can say the same about guys without it. My ex always used autism as the reason why he cheated. He was a horrible person.
What's not fun is dating my autistic boyfriend. I don't have any disabilities and hate how dumb he is. He is obsessed with video games, can't focus on life goals like getting own place and so on, can't cook, can't read emotion, sucks at sex , throw tantrums and doesn't look at me when I talk.
Then why are you in a relationship with him in the first place if you don't respect him? Do the guy a favor and dump him. That seems to be much better for you both.
I hate name calling. I will try to make this as objective as possible. I feel your statement is completely ignorant. You should put more thought into your response before you say such an incompassionate statement. Relationships are between two consenting individuals. You have no RIGHT to tell the individual they shouldn't be dating.
No different than telling two toxic people they shouldn't be together. They lack the qualities to have a healthy relationship, they shouldn't be together. A relationship can be tough enough even for someone who isn't autistic, let alone someone who has as many issues. Not fair to the other person and the other person shouldn't whine because no one wants to deal with it.
I couldn't disagree more. Toxic relationships are different than having Autism. Abusive, toxic people are violating the rights of their partner. It is not the same with two consenting adults in a relationship that has challenges. Next you are going to tell me that others do not have the right to a relationship? How about gay people? Handicap people? Developmentally handicapped? Tell us, where do you draw the line. Maybe the ugly should not be in relationships. Fat people? Tell us, where is that line?
Pretty simple. where you have an inability (as helpfully detailed in the post) to share a healthy and mutually beneficial bond. And to put gay people in thr same boat as mentally handicapped people is really something. As far as I can tell, gay people can understand social cues and communicate just fine enough to manage a relationship. You know who can't? People who can't have trouble interacting with human beings. And if no one wants to date people who can't handle the basics that's their choice and one shouldn't be upset no one wants to date them. No one is entitled to it. If you lack the skills or traits that's too bad for you. It's not fun because you can barely manage normal friendships let alone a romantic one.
To be clear, I'd say the same thing of an emotionally volatile or destructive person. They shouldn't be dating either. Basically anyone with an issue that makes it difficult or impossible to form a healthy relationship shouldn't be dating. Dating can be rough enough without some mental issue. Maybe sort your issues out first and then get involved with someone. That'd be fair for everyone. No one should be made to deal with your issues.
I mean do you see how many people are on here complaining about narcissistic partners? Narcissistic people have issues. Would you encourage them to date? Or maybe tell them to go to therapy before attempting a relationship. Did you know many autistic people have trouble with moral reasoning? Some are easily manipulated. Is that that someone that should be dating?
Actually more than you realize. The funny thing is that most people has something but tries to hide it and ends up being the worst version of themselves π
It depends more on your personality. and no you aren't your diagnose. no one really are unless they tries to be it and use it as an title just like some people still tries to do with job titles.
You have dating communities and sites for those in autism spectrum there you have those that join that is seen as normal from society point of view just because they are in to people that are like that because of their qualities.
The best thing is to not say you are until they ask since descent people doesn't care about thing's like diagnoses when it comes to it. only if they like their company. the same goes with love and sex.
Funny thing is that so called normal female's are very boring individuals that rarely has anything to contribute with. Also many ADHD female's tends to be attracted to aspergers guy's. those girl's are usually the adventurous types of females that has a lot of ball's in the air in life.
It isn't because they are fun since many of them doesn't appear to be that. Try more in the area of trustworthy, reliable, brutal honest, very uncommon of lying, sticks out, the opposite of them.
@crazy8000 , brutal honest, sticks out, the opposite of them. YES
trustworthy, reliable, very uncommon of lying HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I HAD autistic friends and they were some of the most selfish, manipulative and unreliable people I've ever known That's why they're no longer my friends
The question is if they really had it or if you did treat them in the wrong way acording to them that made them be like that. (This one is little to comon. and to many people has little to much expectations, unrealistic ones)
Or are you one of those few that attract the few bad apples that exists in all other groups.
Yes. some of them can appear very self centered. talk to much about themselves. We can over simplify it. the extreme version. Sheldon Cooper in the big bang theory.
The stereotype with autistc people (high functioning/less dependant) is that they excel in math and science, becoming engineers n such. Although the video says that they are often into the arts as well
@Lightning8 That may be true. But I only knew ONE autistic person in real life who was intelligent. Dude was fluent in 11 languages, and knew about geography and shit He supported Communism though, which wasn't very intelligent, but he had book smarts
There's already a ton of people making youtube videos about autism. There's already a ton of people making videos about everything tbh. Making a youtube channel is something I've wanted to do for a long time though. I wanted to make videos about League of Legends and music and other stuff that interested me. I will get around to it eventually and I'll make some videos about autism too I promise :). I'm not charismatic or entertaining at all though. When I start teling a story people are always bored. I just wanna get the information across but the entertainment part is hard for me. It will take a lot of work for me to be even mildly interesting :P. Thanks for your idea and enouragement though I'll keep it in mind :)
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I've autism myself. Never had a problem, though id never date a guy with autism.
Why not? I've got Apsergers, and well... I have had some success with the young ladies in my age group.
@Juterque same reason I dont date short guys though I'm short myself
Because you have higher expectations for other people than you have for yourself? ππππ
@9th_lyfe because I can. Guys don't seem to mind my height or autism probably because they find me sexually attractive.
I guess if you're cool with being a tool and have no self respect, sure.
@9th_lyfe boys will be boys.
This sad story reminds me, I know a guy who is 'dating' an autistic girl, it's basically taking advantage of a mentally challenged person. He told me he's just using her for sex and practice while looking for a real girlfriend (which might not happen any time soon lol). And when he finds a real girlfriend, the autistic girl will no longer be young, she would hit the wall, and nobody wants to deal with a post wall autistic woman (unless the guy also has some serious baggage like HIV or sth)
I've always felt it's going to be a bigger difficulty for men than for women, since guys are expected to do the heavy lifting in dating and relationships and attraction, seduction, if you get what I'm saying
Well done.. i only got diagnosed this year. Its been wonderful understanding myself.. but yes the same issue.. plus im faceblind..
If you go watch the good doctor
He is facing most of the same problems in S3 I have no clue on autism so maybe that will help
Autism shouldn't be things which one decide about persone which we meet. People with autism are really cool! They are always true and trust me, they are good people to have
I dated a guy with autism. I didn't have a great experience but I can say the same about guys without it. My ex always used autism as the reason why he cheated. He was a horrible person.
Look bro donβt let your mental problems affect your life you seem to be doing great for yourself
What's not fun is dating my autistic boyfriend. I don't have any disabilities and hate how dumb he is. He is obsessed with video games, can't focus on life goals like getting own place and so on, can't cook, can't read emotion, sucks at sex , throw tantrums and doesn't look at me when I talk.
Then leave him instead of resenting him for something he can't control.
break up with his ass then
Wow... reading this honestly broke my heart /:
Then why are you in a relationship with him in the first place if you don't respect him? Do the guy a favor and dump him. That seems to be much better for you both.
Look at you do you have to accept. but the other thing's is just attitude problems from his side and that sounds like game addiction.
Sex part is as much your fault it sucks as his.
I could not answer that because I have never been in that situation unless you are then you can not answer it.
At least if your a woman its still bettern then being a male that's a product of a slut / whore
If your autism is thst bad you shouldn't be dating. Relationships aren't a right.
I hate name calling. I will try to make this as objective as possible. I feel your statement is completely ignorant. You should put more thought into your response before you say such an incompassionate statement. Relationships are between two consenting individuals. You have no RIGHT to tell the individual they shouldn't be dating.
No different than telling two toxic people they shouldn't be together. They lack the qualities to have a healthy relationship, they shouldn't be together. A relationship can be tough enough even for someone who isn't autistic, let alone someone who has as many issues. Not fair to the other person and the other person shouldn't whine because no one wants to deal with it.
I couldn't disagree more. Toxic relationships are different than having Autism. Abusive, toxic people are violating the rights of their partner. It is not the same with two consenting adults in a relationship that has challenges. Next you are going to tell me that others do not have the right to a relationship? How about gay people? Handicap people? Developmentally handicapped? Tell us, where do you draw the line. Maybe the ugly should not be in relationships. Fat people? Tell us, where is that line?
Pretty simple. where you have an inability (as helpfully detailed in the post) to share a healthy and mutually beneficial bond. And to put gay people in thr same boat as mentally handicapped people is really something. As far as I can tell, gay people can understand social cues and communicate just fine enough to manage a relationship. You know who can't? People who can't have trouble interacting with human beings. And if no one wants to date people who can't handle the basics that's their choice and one shouldn't be upset no one wants to date them. No one is entitled to it. If you lack the skills or traits that's too bad for you. It's not fun because you can barely manage normal friendships let alone a romantic one.
I am going back to re-read this post because obviously one of us has misconstrued the context.
To be clear, I'd say the same thing of an emotionally volatile or destructive person. They shouldn't be dating either. Basically anyone with an issue that makes it difficult or impossible to form a healthy relationship shouldn't be dating. Dating can be rough enough without some mental issue. Maybe sort your issues out first and then get involved with someone. That'd be fair for everyone. No one should be made to deal with your issues.
I mean do you see how many people are on here complaining about narcissistic partners? Narcissistic people have issues. Would you encourage them to date? Or maybe tell them to go to therapy before attempting a relationship. Did you know many autistic people have trouble with moral reasoning? Some are easily manipulated. Is that that someone that should be dating?
Autism is a pit of inferences, find your hidden talent and then your a geninus
Pewnie ΕΌe tak
I don't understand why people think I'm an asshole when I tell autistic people, their autism is the reason they can't get a partner
Because it is a ignorant statement. in many countries.
@crazy8000 Why though? No no normal girl is gonna date an autistic person. this is simply fact
Actually more than you realize.
The funny thing is that most people has something but tries to hide it and ends up being the worst version of themselves π
It depends more on your personality. and no you aren't your diagnose. no one really are unless they tries to be it and use it as an title just like some people still tries to do with job titles.
You have dating communities and sites for those in autism spectrum there you have those that join that is seen as normal from society point of view just because they are in to people that are like that because of their qualities.
The best thing is to not say you are until they ask since descent people doesn't care about thing's like diagnoses when it comes to it. only if they like their company. the same goes with love and sex.
Funny thing is that so called normal female's are very boring individuals that rarely has anything to contribute with.
Also many ADHD female's tends to be attracted to aspergers guy's. those girl's are usually the adventurous types of females that has a lot of ball's in the air in life.
@crazy8000 Well I mean... okay yeah, that's actually kind of true. Both statements.
But you don't need to have Asperger's to be fun
It isn't because they are fun since many of them doesn't appear to be that.
Try more in the area of trustworthy, reliable, brutal honest, very uncommon of lying, sticks out, the opposite of them.
@crazy8000 , brutal honest, sticks out, the opposite of them. YES
trustworthy, reliable, very uncommon of lying
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I HAD autistic friends and they were some of the most selfish, manipulative and unreliable people I've ever known
That's why they're no longer my friends
The question is if they really had it or if you did treat them in the wrong way acording to them that made them be like that.
(This one is little to comon. and to many people has little to much expectations, unrealistic ones)
Or are you one of those few that attract the few bad apples that exists in all other groups.
Yes. some of them can appear very self centered. talk to much about themselves.
We can over simplify it. the extreme version. Sheldon Cooper in the big bang theory.
As a college educated person, I don't have much to discuss with autistic people
I wanna talk about something else besides video games and Animae
The stereotype with autistc people (high functioning/less dependant) is that they excel in math and science, becoming engineers n such. Although the video says that they are often into the arts as well
@Lightning8 That may be true.
But I only knew ONE autistic person in real life who was intelligent.
Dude was fluent in 11 languages, and knew about geography and shit
He supported Communism though, which wasn't very intelligent, but he had book smarts
Some people WITHOUT Autism die alone and miserable.
So, look on that bright side.
You should be sharing that with the world. You could help so many
What do you mean? Like make youtube videos or something?
That's a damn good start. Seriously there is probably so many others that struggle with the same issues. It would be awesome of you.
There's already a ton of people making youtube videos about autism. There's already a ton of people making videos about everything tbh. Making a youtube channel is something I've wanted to do for a long time though. I wanted to make videos about League of Legends and music and other stuff that interested me. I will get around to it eventually and I'll make some videos about autism too I promise :). I'm not charismatic or entertaining at all though. When I start teling a story people are always bored. I just wanna get the information across but the entertainment part is hard for me. It will take a lot of work for me to be even mildly interesting :P. Thanks for your idea and enouragement though I'll keep it in mind :)
This is one of the most interesting post I've seen in a while.
Try love instead if that's hard to understand its cause dont understand feel instead
My brother is autistic.
Are people with autism slow to react? Or slow to learn new things?
@Gstacy703 slow in every way, and even have ugly ass faces as well
@Gstacy703 I think there are many different kinds of people with autism. It depends.
@NatalieKeller95 be gone catfish.
@NatalieKeller95 Damn your a bitch smfh
@SCLarsson417 itβs obviously a dude
Your probably right π
As someone with autism, can confirm lol
was anyone ever insinuating that it is fun? xD