From being on dating apps, I have the great urge to give some tips to make your game extra strong. I've been on both Tinder and Bumble and I notice some mistakes a lot of men make while making conversation. Please take this with a grain of salt, since there's no golden rule. I refer here to men, because I'm a straight cis female, but as a female or other gender, feel free to use these tips, because anyone can initiate. Also I'm not assuming men should always be the initiater, but it often is the reality. I think apps like bumble are great with the female always initiating, but initiation shows confidence and that's always an attractive thing.
1. Start the conversation with something witty and/or personal
Great thing about the app Bumble is that the girl has to start conversation so I have some experience in that part. I normally look at someone's pictures or bio and start with a question or a comment of what I think or see of them. Things like 'Your dog is a real cutie and so are you' or 'I would love to hike with you' or 'I'm guessing you're a surfer, is that true?', just depending on what their profile says and what comes to mind first. Don't be too shy. If it doesn't work out not a lot is lost and I will guarantee you a reply at least, positive or negative.
2. Work on your profile
Not only is it great if you can read something from someone's profile, but it's great if the other person can do the same to you. Post pictures of how you want to display yourself and personality. If you like traveling, post a vacation picture. Are you adventurous? Post a picture doing sports or something exciting. DON'T EVER POST A PICTURE WITH ANOTHER WOMAN. Doesn't matter if it's your sister. Most women will not read that bio saying 'that's my sister'. They will swipe you away directly. Most women will melt of a picture with an animal (except if she hates animals and you do too, then maybe not, but who hates animals??). Always post enough pictures and at least 1 or 2 close ups. I'm not talking about an awkward mirror selfie, but a nice photo of you smiling for example. Filters are never good of course. Group photos are alright if you just have 1 or 2.
3. Don't chat for too long or too short
This is a difficult one, because what is too long and what is too short? I will tell you. Too short is right away. So saying 'hey what's up. what are you doing in a daily life? okay let's meet up'. Why? It's because we women have learned to not meet up with a strange man. You want the feeling of safety first that we can sort of trust a person before meeting. Also it looks a bit lazy in a way. For too long chatting, it's a bit of a waste of time to chat for too long, because only a real meeting can tell if there's real chemistry or not. In experience a person can be entirely different in real life compared to chat. Also bonding doesn't happen that easily through chat. Also a woman can get tired of the endlessly chatting and not acting, showing you're too scared to take initiative. Imagine as a female, you have a lot more matches (at least I did), so if you don't take initiative, someone else will.
4. For a first date, meet up for drinks or coffee. Don't invite her to your house
This is one I see a lot. I know a lot of men mean well as a courteous idea to cook for her and everything, but in reality, women don't want to meet up in a stranger's house for the first time. It comes back to the thing I said in point 3, we learn not to meet up with strange men and learn to be careful. It's also a bit too personal and maybe awkward for her, because you can see everything about him at once. Not that it's a really bad thing to be open, but leaving a little bit of mystery might be more interesting for her. Also, if she ever wants to leave, because she does not feel comfortable or etc, it's a lot more difficult if it's in your house, so she might feel trapped in a way. Also, having someone to travel to you for the first time gives a lazy impression. On the first date, at least meet half-way or come to her city etc.
5. Be bold, flirt a little bit
Something I've experienced a lot is that men are too afraid to flirt. I get it, I am too and I could definitely use some improvement in that area. However, self-confidence is attractive and flirting shows self-confidence. It doesn't have to be cheesy with pick-up lines, but maybe give her a cheeky little compliment or a little touch at the arm. See how she reacts and where you can go.
6. When meeting up, propose an idea
Something I really dislike is when someone asks me to meet up and is then like 'idk what do you wanna do' and comes with nothing. It's not a bad question persé, it can be helpful to see where she's at, but after you should come up with something. The worst thing that can happen is that she says 'no I don't think that's a good idea' and then you come with something else. Great thing about dating apps is that the threshold and risk is very low. If you mess up, you go on to the next one worst case scenario.
I hope these tips where interesting to read! Maybe I will come up with more and add them. Comment on your thoughts, but stay nice please.