myReview

Should guys always pay?

aspiegirl_

Okay, so here's another myTake.

If you don't like it, it's okay, I understand and I have no problem with that, after all we all think differently 🧠. Anyway, so if you're a girl/boy/alien or whatever and after reading this you're angry, you disagree with what I said or feel offended, that's your problem... After all if the shoe fits, wear it, mi ciela! If you try to insult me through the comments at least have the huevotes to do it showing your username and not anonymously :)
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Should guys always pay?
No.
That's it. That's the answer. Guys should not always pay and before you give me some of your mala vibra keep reading, please.

Should guys always pay?

I used to be one of those girls, I admit it. I used to think that guys should always pay because:
1. They are guys
2. Guys must be the providers
3. This is one is horrible and quite stupid: the guy who always pays is a gentleman, whereas if he doesn't pay he's an idiot, a douche, an imbecile, etc.

Yeah, I know it's pathetic to think that way, but I've changed my mind and I understand if many girls still thinking that way, but guys, that's not our fault, remember we live in a society where everything is girl's stuff and the other side is guy's stuff. I can't speak for other cultures/countries but at least in mine, we, girls, were taught (and still are) to always be there for men, respect them, to serve them, and basically be submissive, while they are taught to make money and be the macho. Now, in other countries it might have changed.

Girls, do you find it sweet when a guy offers to pay? I bet you feel like he cares about you, you feel like you mean a lot to him. Well, he would feel exactly the same if you offer to split the bill. Some girls (some, I'm not saying all girls and I'm not saying your name, so please stop making me de pedo for this, thanks) think «Why should I offer to split the bill if he will say no? I've tried many times and he always says no», I understand, but hey, even if they don't let you pay, they do appreciate that gesture and it's something they won't forget. But also if they accept the girl's offer, she will get angry and think «Are you serious? Stop me now and say you'll pay for both of us. I'm a woman, how dare you to expect such a thing like this? I know I offered to split the bill but that doesn't mean you have to accept it!» and let's be honest, maaaany girls have ended a relationship just because guys accepted to split the bill. The fact that you offer to split the bill means a lot to them, or even if you offer to give some money, not even the half of the bill but at least something! That means a lot to them.

If you expect guys to always pay this is what they will think:
1. I feel used.
2. She only wants me because I pay for her
3. Am I paying for her company? Do I have to pay if I want to spend some time with her?

And you will think, if he doesn't pay for me every time means I'm not important to him, he doesn't like me, he doesn't love me, he's an idiot and he doesn't deserve me. That's wrong, money has NOTHING to do with that.

However, there's a situation where only one of you must pay for everything (and it doesn't matter if you're a girl or a guy): when you ask them to go on a date with you. If she asks you to go on a date, she should pay, she's the one who's inviting you. If he asks you to go on a date, he should pay for everything. But hey, both should always offer to split or help with part of the bill, that doesn't make you less woman/man. Guys nor girls are cash machines, we should take care of each other's pockets and treat each other from time to time.

It's not fair to make and expect guys to pay all the time. Just enjoy each other's company and offer some help even if he says «No worries, I'll pay». And it's not bad if at some point you pay for the complete bill, that's sweet as well. And this is not only when going on a date, it's in general. If you go to a shop, to the cinema, etc, always offer to help and they will appreciate it ☺️❤️.

Thanks for reading,
All the love 💛.

Should guys always pay?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • AynonOMouse
    The one thing I would say differently is for the first date each person should always pay their own way so nobody feels used or obligated since many first dates are the ONLY dates and they realize they aren't compatible.
    Plus the first date is often when guys get used for a free meal/entertainment then never see her again because she was only looking for a free hand out and never had any intentions of being with him in the first place.

    Then they could take turns paying.

    Personally I won't pay her way at all until she pays for me first. No way.
    Is this still revelant?
  • MannySimms
    Eventually, the guy pays anyway. Most marriages fail.
    "... before you give me some of your mala vibra.."
    I thought there was a vaccine for that!Should guys always pay?
    Is this still revelant?
    • aspiegirl_

      But would they appreciate it if their girl helped them from time to time?

    • MannySimms

      I wouldn't, and I can only speak for myself. Just doesn't matter to me as I don't keep score.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Daniela1982
    It's not that we don't like a mytake, but the question has been asked 100 times already about who should pay. But I guess it's still not settled yet. I thought it was left at Dutch Treat on the first date - each pays for their own. But maybe the girls decided they want the guy to pay, even though it makes them look like moochers and dating just for a free meal. In fact, I think they have their own club.Should guys always pay?
    Is this still revelant?
    • Daniela1982 - my men did not mind paying for a date with me and I am not a moocher either but then again a guy who would date a thing like you would rather die or throw up when looking at your face then be around a woman who is as ugly as you are

  • Anonymous
    Honestly? It’s just me I’m not sure about the rest of the ladies but if I get invited by my guy I ask you want to split? Of if he wants to pay to just pay. But if I invite him and want to spoil him of course I want to pay lol. I honestly believe it should be 50/50 unlike some jerk guys that expect you to pay for it all 😒 smh lol
    Is this still revelant?
    • aspiegirl_

      Sounds totally like me! Haha, they deserve attention and love too, right?

    • Anonymous

      Yes ! Guys deserve attention and love and to be spoiled here and there ;) haha

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What Girls & Guys Said

629
  • kymberz
    you are one of the sweetest people i have had the opportunity to meet on this site and i thank this site for that! you have such a giant perspective on a variety of things - this just being one. and yes - i agree with you 100%! fair is fair and i like for things to be fair and equal because each person plays a different role in a relationship - but no one should be expected to pay all the time! and hey - when i go out with one or more of my girlfriends - well let's just say when it comes time to pay - oh man - it gets downright nasty and ugly! hair-pulling, caterwauling (sp?), drinks dumped in each other's faces and that's just from suggesting we all put in what we owe! you don't even want to know what happens when one of us suggests to pay the entire bill? then it's in an alley with people laying bets on who's gonna win but there are too many matches going on and at the end we all just say - oh whatever! and then one of us gathers up the money from the variously-bloodied others and we pay... and usually are asked not to come back. so scratch that resaurant off of our lists of places to go! so why would it be different with a guy? just offer to pay your part and he will let you know if that is ok or not. because maybe he wants to pay to show you appreciation. and telling him about the story of you and your girlfriends not being allowed in several restaurants in town takes the heat off of him and might make him laugh. and might make it easier for him to accept your offer of paying half - especially if he doesn't make a ton of money. it also shows him that you are a kind girl and that you are not out for him pay for everything all of the time. and that is important for a guy to know that about you right from the beginning. so if he ever has to question your motives - he can skip right past that question. and you might make him feel good just by offering. or you might make him feel like a god when he insists on paying. either way - everyone wins right? and that's what really matters!
    • roland77

      You writer to much or I'm a lazy ass. ;-)

  • razelove
    I like it, If the subject of who pays is never broached I'll choose a cheap date, museum, coffee, park. Budget never exceeds 20 dollars. If we're talking about going 50/50, even I get this time, you get next time, then I'm not worried about being used for a free meal. I've broken off sexual relationships because I was expected to cover the bill one too many times. It's very frustrating, and you summed it up best "guys nor girls are cash machines"
  • noxius
    Absolutely not, if you are looking to get into a relationship you should both be giving as much as the other person. You are in it together after all.
    • aspiegirl_

      Hahaha, that's what I said 😌. Equality is important

    • noxius

      It really is. Good mytake :)

    • aspiegirl_

      Thank you! ☺️

  • MissDawn7961
    I have dated a lot of men and most of the men paid for everything on our dates and did not ask me to pay for anything ! to thank them for paying for the dates I would fix him a home cooked meal that I cooked myself just for him to enjoy ! thanks
  • Liam_Hayden
    No, guys should not always pay, however since it is often multiple men competing for the attention of each woman it makes sense that the lady will take the best deal available, and that is usually a guy who will pay. It is simply the law of supply and demand.
  • jenn11161986
    Nope. You should talk about it if you two are going out. Are you going to pay 50/50? Or if he/she will pay it this time then you are going to pay for your date next time.
  • YHL6965
    Great take once again! It's really nice to hear women like you who make the effort of seeing things from our perspective instead of being self-centered or even entitled.

    I personally don't mind paying for dates, but I would feel used after a while. It's very nice when a woman does all the gestures you mentioned.

    Anyway, amazing take! We need more women like you!
  • RickPen
    I think this is a fair and well-stated piece. Thank you for coming from a place of logic and understanding.
  • username4h
    Why should guys pay always i agree that he should treat her special but girls have legs brains and arms too and if they wanna stand up for their rights they should pay the bills and dinner if there is this equallity. Every girl needs to know how to take care of herself and her husband or boyfriend if she is a true one. That goes for guys too
  • Einsteinagogo
    Me personally pay everytime if I'm on a date or in a relationship only time I would allow a woman pay for anything is if she was a friend and that doesn't happen often like my birthday or she insists. I do it because I believe in paying for my date or partner but if we live together then it's our money so we are both paying and it doesn't matter who gets the bill. As for going Dutch if that's how you spell it I be against it unless she made a seen then I probably let her pay and walk away !
  • bulletbob555
    Yes I expect to pay. If I waver I might say you leave the tip. If I do that I also use it to see how generous or fair she is a test to see if she was sincere in the offer. Now if I didn't have the money to do something and wouldn't because of funds. If she offered to pay and it was something I wanted to do then that works
  • AliyahMia
    The way I see it whoever asked who on the date should pay. Or if you're an item and you plan dates together then you can take turns.
  • mikeandy
    I think it is fine for guys to pay always as long as they can afford to , when I go out with broke girls i usually take them to cheap restaurants and pretend that i am generous and pay for their food. But I know other girls and that make enough money so they usually pay for me or at least split the bill because they know that they are doing better than me. So it really depends on financial status of people you are going out with.
  • Floki-raven
    I Made the experiance that a lot of Girls dont want me to pay. Most of the time they just wanted me to be there for the an Rock to rest on.
  • roland77
    1000% agreeable! If the girl is broke, we can date somewhere else than in an expensive restaurant and I pay the low-price bill gladly.
  • eagle1951
    in my opinion yes the guy should pay. it's the way i was bought up.
    • aspiegirl_

      That's understandable, in my country it kinda works that way

    • roland77

      Why? Split the bill. In the end, both have eaten/drink together. Why should one side pay, the other got a free lunch?

  • jamesgoldman
    I always prepare to pay if she offers to pay or goes halves then the server gets a nice tip
  • zafar997
    Dont want to always pay. Its according to the girl. If she treats well. We can do anything for that. If she want only one thing want to happen. Then won't pay for blaahh..😜
  • funtims615
    Heck no. Ladies should pay too sometime. It all comes down to Situation
  • Shamalien
    If I'm doing the asking, I'm prepared to pay. If they ask me and then expect me to pay that would make me feel used lol
  • parjacpar
    No as there as we have equal rights these days and I think everything should be done fairly
  • Plitty-Tank
    Agree. Men don't like to pay much now due to feeling used or that the woman won't do nice things in return.
  • COMMODOREII
    Woohoo!! I love your my take. I agree with you 100%. 😄
  • alance99
    I respect everybody's thinking but i would never allow my girl to pay, she should just buy anything she likes with my credit card
  • ThatdudeTy
    I'm very traditional in this the men should always pay or make effort to pay...
  • DonCachondo
    Guys always pay one way or another... every time -.-
  • Aiko_E_Lara
    Not always but biologically hardwired, we're made to be the breadwinners.
  • JamesRandiDebates
    If the guy is going to bone the bitch, he should at least pay for her coffee first.
    • litty

      How about if it's she gets to bone him. Women are horny too

    • @litty I guess I'm just old-fashioned.

    • litty

      Yeah I know what you mean. If paying for a meal made it more likely for sex the whole night, then it's still better than paying 200$ for an hour with a prostitute.

  • Browneye57
    TLDR. Only if they're rich. ;)
  • anton_dee
    You dead right gurl. Luv your opinion
  • SecretGardenBlood65
    Good take
  • Zoi02
    I think it’s the asker who should pay.
  • TwoToTooTutu2
    Assuming non-extraneous circonstance... Yes.
  • Parker85
    Yes guys should always pay as most like to.
  • Anonymous
    If your spouse is broke who cares. If you yourself is broke who cares. If you're with someone you dedicated yourself to then money doesn't matter. When one dies you can't spend money. This doesn't apply to users, lazy shits and liars.
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