Another thing Cosmopolitan gets wrong about dating

[jennifer_bloom]

A sample of their magazine issue, note the word “Would you hate date?” Next to the image of the chubby woman.

Cosmopolitan is a magazine for girls or ladies who want to attract men in a superficial way using bodily mechanics and clothes.

But that is not the way to get a guy, because what a man values more than anything is loyalty.

I know a woman with severe brain injuries who looks like she is drunk with a broken face and her boyfriend is gorgeous and owns over 8 cars and trucks, gives her rides to art class and appointments with her doctor, and has been loyal to her for over a decade.

The reason this 10/10 guy chose a 1/10 girl is he wanted a loyal woman who would never lie to him or be rude to him. She hit the jackpot, while doing nothing other than being herself, while at the same time, all these gorgeous woman are upgrading their bodies and their careers and getting dumped and cheated on.

Loyalty and Kindness is far more valuable to a guy than hair or make up or physical fitness. An unreliable woman will always get dumped or abused.

[purplepoppy]

I remember chancing on a paper years ago written by the U. S. navy along those lines. They argued that men in jobs such as the military who spend long periods away from home rank loyalty and faithfulness as the most important characteristic of a potential wife.

[WowwGirl]

Those people need to study psychology of attraction or sexual psychology. Those magazine are for idiots

[HellGeist]

I'm glad that you can see how much so many men value loyalty!

Now it's also a matter of degrees for each man, but I myself see myself as around a 5.5/10 often times, and I would MUCH rather date someone loyal and genuine as opposed to a drop-dead gorgeous woman.

Give me a loyal, sweet, feminine 5/10 or 6/10 ANY DAY for an LTR or marriage over an 8,9 or 10. Especially if she has strong values and a lower body count.

To me, as long as there is a small spark or modicum of physical attraction, then inevitably I will fall in love with her if she is a good woman.

She can be on the heavier curvy side (not morbidly obeese,) or on the really skinny smaller-chested side like one of my ex's, who is a wonderful older woman who taught me so much, and I love her on a spiritual level and wish her all the best.

So I've dated and been attracted to both plus size girls and very slim girls. I've dated women that were years older than me, and women my age.

Her face doesn't have to make men turn heads, either. And she does't have to have a bodacious butt, lol (but that is always nice!).

I don't like the Instagram Barbie look that is popular. I know some guys go nuts for that and simp over them non-stop

I can often see that a lot of those sorts of girls are superficially attractive, and they have every right to dress and look how they want, but duck face with tons of make up and weird filters and tons of revealing selfie photos for seeking validation and likes is an INSTANT turn off for me, even if she is a solid 8,9, or 10.

Plus some of these model-looking girls don't have the best attitude, solipsism entitlement and commitment issues. No thanks for anything serious!

The core of the matter is that a beautiful woman becomes ugly in my eyes if she has a poor personality. But the average or even below-average woman becomes elevated and GORGEOUS in my eyes if I fall in love with the beautiful person INSIDE.

Even if I were rich and jacked and I bumped my Sexual Market Value up a few points, I STILL would not want to date or be committed to a 10/10 (especially if she were an unkind, unreliable or promiscuous woman, because I feel she would likely be very high maintenance and a pain in the ass to be with and keep around.

An attractive woman has so many more options than an attractive man, and a 10/10 could be with almost any man she chooses.

I would feel like I was in competition with EVERY man on the globe, and that would get old and exhausting real quick.

Obviously, this is NOT to say that gorgeous women CAN'T be good or loyal! And there are plenty of 49ers out there! (Women who are 4/10 who act and think like they are 9's and feel/act entitled or spoiled.)

I'm sure there are some amazing women out there who a wife material and amazing inside and out.

The main point I am rambling on about is that I find it sad that a lot of women have deep insecurities about their looks, because I don't think I'm a rare sort of guy.

Men are visual creatures, yes. We get reputations for being shallow because the bad boy types who sometimes prey on beautiful women's low self-esteem and insecurities them and then trade them out for younger models.

But there are many men with similar mindsets to mine of all walks of life who value actual VALUE in a woman! And true value comes from within.

I don't care how wealthy someone is. Yes, a man NEEDS to have money, but that does NOT buy loyalty if you wife up a bad woman. Look at some celebrity marriages like Will Smith right now, for example.

"Your" girl could be drop-dead gorgeous and you could have men envying you for miles, but if she isn't loyal or kind?

Then she is not yours, bro! It's just your turn, and then she's onto the next mark, lol!

Give me a 5/10 who is loyal and wifely over a 10 who isn't, Every. Single. Time!

I'm really glad that disabled woman you know found a good man. She sounds like a kind soul. I hope he always treats her well.

A truly kind and loyal woman is both a Godsend and a Blessing.

[Kaamraj]

Yes men to value loyalty greatly, it's something ingrained in the masculine culture to make sure that that we form connections that last a lifetime. However, it's also true that men are visual creatures and if he doesn't feel sexual attraction towards a female, he's not going to approach. The cases you have mentioned where a woman is no longer sexually attractive, however that man is still with her and still provides his commitment is mostly because when she was sexually attractive she had committed to him.

[crazy8000]

The amusing thing is that majority of female's are rarely themselves. many of them aren't aware of it. and relationships rarely works for them in the long run.

No wonder he changed her. apart of that she most likely had a lot of other qualities as a person most doesn't possess yet. and she most likely was able to trigger the right feelings in him for her.
Doesn't surprise me she didn't play games and was straight forward.
Even went for him instead of waiting for him to do everything.

[mark000h]

This is true. Loyalty and a kind heart easily outweigh so called "sexiness". A man will easily choose someone viewed as "average" by others over the drop-dead gorgeous girl who is flush with guys.

[Dan_cColt]

You are right men do value loyalty over almost everything, however men are visual creatures and most like conventionally attractive females. Your take on loyalty is correct but men also have taste and won't just pick a 1/10 cause she perceives or is perceived to be crazy loyal.

[Yourfriend2021]

Cosmopolitan promotes sleeping around and gives everyone the media controlled view of women.

[Minahh]

True

[cth96190]

The military divorce/infidelity/cuckolding rate is approaching 100 per cent.
It is the same here in Australia.
Military men should not have relationships.

[Mangospacho]

But that’s why it’s only £2 now because nobody reads it anymore. 😃

[malwins]

yeah it wasn't so cheap i remember

[Mangospacho]

@malwins It used to be at least £5 from what I remember.

[Anonymous]

I think a lot of women are taught what they need to look for instead of understanding it's a 2-way street.

It's honestly the fault of men becase for so many years it was all about what men want, now in today's society women have more agency in their choices and preferences but I think they overlook that relationships are both ways.

[Babygirl_S]

A lot of the "10/10" guys don't realize that women less attractive than them are more likely to feel grateful. I also think the more attractive partner is more dominating in the relationship.

[Shiningtempest]

@jennifer_bloom Cosmopolitan writers need to study what makes dating & marriages successful before they embarrass themselves again.

[bubblesonu]

I like what you wrote

[Sketti2021]

What if he chose her for her heart

[malwins]

hate date? oh lord