Is she avoiding hanging out with me? how could I find out?

To make this short: I don't get this girl, who's interested in me, and i'm gonna list everything she does/has said to me

- I asked her once why we barely hang, she says she rarely leaves her house. What I find odd tho is the rare times she does leave her house, she spends it with her guy friend (of 8 years, so i dont mind) or she's doing something else. My logic is she would invite me out during those times she rarely leaves right?

- She is getting professional help for her alcoholism. She says she "Feels awkward and uncomfortable hanging with me" because she wants to stay single and not develop feelings.

-She tells me she has social anxiety, and even going to a starbucks by herself is hard

- whenever i'd ask her to hang, she'd always say "idk" or "maybe" or "We'll see". i finally confronted her and asked why she always says those answers, i asked her if it's just a polite no. she says she means her answers cause "her mood always changes about hanging out" but what does that even mean? lol

-She's asked me to hang out 3 times in total. one of them fell through, 2 of them she flaked out on

-She's pretty neutral/slightly flirty when i flirt with her, but i haven't seen her in an entire month

- i asked her one time "i know you said guys you meet online, some of them you rarely hang with some of them you hang with alot, why not me?" and she goes "jesus christ im tired of repeating myself" (repeating herself as in "idk" or "maybe" etc)

I might add more later, but please, any opinions? I feel like i'm being played/strung along for attention sometimes. Only thing i know is she has never lied to me once, and she told me (when i first got her #) she's been screwed over so much she wouldn't do that to anyone else

Also if anyone can think of a way i can ask her politely, if she's avoiding me, please feel free to post

  • avoiding you
    Vote A
  • not avoiding you/overthinking it
    Vote B
  • other (post what)
    Vote C
Select a gender to cast your vote:
I'm a GirlI'm a Guy


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • Question is do you like her? I would get pretty tired of someone flaking out on me like that. If you like her enough to stick through all that (it seems like she has to work on herself, and she said she wanted to be single) then be there for her and be her friend. Maybe show up at her door and bring food and a movie or something and just hang out and maybe she'll realise it wasn't so bad (she might feel stressed out making plans with someone if she's got social anxiety).

    But don't pressure her on why she doesn't hang out with you and all that because it seems like she's got a lot on her plate already. She might just get really annoyed and that won't help you getting closer to her.

    Hope it works out for you :)


What Guys Said 1

  • I voted "other"

    I stopped reading after the second paragraph. Move on dude. If she isn't taking the time to hang out with you then just move the fuck on. Who knows the real reasons why? But you shouldn't waste your time thinking about it.

    Women aren't hard to get when they really want you.

    • She's obviously not into you. Maybe she likes a bit of attention, but she's blowing you off. The fact that she got pissed at your attempts to ask about hanging out means she's obviously trying to avoid you. Anything that may have led you to beleive otherwise may have just been her just being nice.

    • Nitro's right dude. If she's getting pissed then let it go. You don't want to be "that" guy.