Please help, I think I lost the perfect guy due to my insecurities?

okay so iv dated my bf for a while, it was a seriouse relationship.

but the was somthing in the relationship that kept bugging me, his likes and preference for blondes,... and the fact he comments on other girls pictures saying they are Hot and Gourgouse... and they are all pettite girls,..

now i know he was with me and not them but him having eyes for others girls and girls that were of his preference bugged me like hell,...

so when i read his comments for others girls saying they are gourgouse and hot,.. i lost my cool,... i told him you probly want to fuck and think about fucking then,... he said no he does not and that im the prettiest,... it did not make me feel reasured,... i still felt mad,...

i told him i do not like him liking other girls, its somthing i do not like no matter what coz it makes me feel sad,... he then says i like what i like and i can not stop that, and i like a whole a lot of other things besides you... it made me feel really hurt,... then said it doesn't matter what i like as long as im the only one he wants,... but it still didn't change my emotions,... i still feltt hurt,...

but I don't know what the reason is but i feel like it was a mistake breaking up with him, he also claimed it was a mistake, but idont know,.. i still want him but then i dont,...

i know im not the most chilled girl out there but im not emotionally stable never had been, im extremly fragile girl...

and yeah iv just this Q before cause i didn't get enough ansswers

and please no rude comments, please...


Most Helpful Guy

  • No you haven't lost the perfect guy or anything. He just wasn't into you. There was nothing you could do, if he found other girls attractive then you can't force anything. You did the right thing. Find a guy who appreciates you, a guy who believes your the most beautiful girl in the world. That's what you deserve. This guy was a douche, he made you insecure on purpose... Yea I might check out other girls here and there but I'll never tell my gf about it, I know it will make her feel bad and unappreciated.
    let it run it's course, get over him and move on. That's the best for you.


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What Guys Said 4

  • If you really love this guy talk to him. Complete honesty Is always the best way to go about things. If your comfortable tell about why it bothers you and ask him to keep the comments to himself. He might find other girls physically attractive that's normal. But what matters is that he finds something more special in you that is more appealing than just the physical attraction. If you truly trust him just tell him to keep his appreciation of others beauty to himself. If your insecurities make you nervous about his loyalty be honest about it and working on this together will only make you grow as a couple. It's not to late but you might have to apologize for breaking (only the break up) before really trying to make it work.

    • i have talked to him about it, he said he likes what he likes and can not stop it, and that he likes a lot of whole other things besides me,... i told him it make me feel bad that he likes other girls, he said thats my choice...

    • then he said it doesn't matter what he likes as long as im the one he wants but it still didn't reasure my emotions.

    • It sounds like he doesn't care about how he makes you feel in that case I'd question whether he's good for you or not. If you really care about having a relationship with him talk to him about whether or not actually cares about how he makes you feel. If he's willing to work on things mutually then give it time. Ask him to keep certain comments to himself and if you feel comfortable tell him your insecurities and see if he's willing to work on these with you. If he is not he may not be right for you. You deserve someone who will help you with your insecurities rather than hurt you more. If he's willing to work with your give him a chance if not find someone who will.

  • You aren't wrong in my point of view. If you don't like him looking and commenting other girl's pictures he should respect it and show that he really thinks the things he claims to think about you. It's reasonable that you felt this way when he said that other girls are hot, I think that it's something you just don't need to say when you have a girlfriend

    • i just couldnt diegest him saying he likes blodes its somthing i never wanted to hear,... i know he found other women attractive, i would see his comment of other women all the time but it would be okay when he told me im the only one,... but then him saying i like other things besides me i couldnt take it... he would tell me if i breakup it would be my mistake,.. I don't know why i feel like it is,

    • You have good reasons to feel like this. As I said, one just doesn't say those things to a girlfriend, it's not really necessary.

    • okay i just felt really confused why so,... anyways thank a lot for your options.

  • I remember a previous question you asked regarding this man, & honestly I felt at the time your relationship might not last. After reading this, I'm sorry you're upset & hurt that you lost what you believe was the perfect man (I'm confident I could convince you otherwise), but I also believe this is absolutely in your best interest.

    To feel settled for is a horrible feeling, one I do understand. And your ex should've been wise enough to, at least, understand this isn't a feeling you want the one you're with to feel. It's fine to like various things, but at the end of the day, he should have made sure you knew he preferred all of you, mind & body, above all others. Respectfully, you're too attractive & sensitive to be settled for, nor should you settle.

    You made the right choice. Don't question yourself.

  • If he's your bf, they're is zero reason for him to go as far as telling other women they're hot or whatever. Is it expected that you are the only pretty woman in the world or that he won't notice the others? No. However him making open public comments about it is completely disrespectful to you.


What Girls Said 1

  • He sounds like a jerk. I wouldn't mind if my bf looked at other girls but he shouldn't tell me that or that he likes them. I think you could give him another chance but he should stop doing that