Why haven't we had sex yet?

[Anonymous]

It's obvious none of you would possibly know the answer but Id just like a second opinion so I know I'm not just being a douchebag.

Our one month anniversary is on Friday and we still haven't done anything sexual. And her period started today so its not like she wants to do it Friday 😒

We were already friends before we started dating so we've already gotten past the I love you's and stuff.

Me and her mom are close too and her mom tells me that I'm all she ever talks about.

She's not a virgin. She had sex with her previous boyfriendsds. (Not sure how far into the relationships)

So if she's so into me, why haven't we done anything sexual yet?

I've always had sex with my previous girlfriends like after hanging out 3 or so times, so this is kind of unusual to me I guess

Updates

+1 y

She teases me on the phone all the time, and sometimes in person. But it never goes anywhere.

[SparkleQueen]

I understand your confusion - obviously, you and she have a very deep & long connection and this just doesn't make much sense. I think there could be 2 reasons - either she may have some past abuse or feel afraid to share something personal with you; or, her love and great value of you may be so intense that she could be super nervous or feel overwhelmed/embarrassed. You didn't mention if the 2 of you have discussed this. If not, try broaching the subject (or ask her mom to do some "spying" :)) and asking her what she thinks/feels. If you have, maybe ask again or see if her reasons not to are valid.

[kaylaS91]

Just because a girl is into you doesn't mean she'll be ready to have sex, especially if she's still a virgin. She could be waiting for marriage, till you've been together a certain amount of time first. Also, just because you had sex with your previous girlfriends doesn't mean anything regarding this one.
Believe it or not, but every girl is different.

If you want an answer, why not ask your girlfriend?

[apple24]

upvote!

[Asker]

I specified that she isn't a vergin and has actually had sex with a few people, men and woman actually. So chill

[kaylaS91]

okay if having sex is such a high priority to you (together for 1 month is nothing but...) then why don't you ask her instead of shooting in the dark and asking a bunch of people online?

[Asker]

It's awesome that you keep jumping to conclusions lol. Its not a biggie to me. But she's had sex with 4 guys so it's starting to make me feel weird that she won't do it with me yet.

[kaylaS91]

okay I guess I read it as more of a complaint that she's not having sex with you when the other boyfriend's she had been with did get some versus your genuinely being curiuos and perhaps a bit insecure why not with you. Just since that's generally the tone behind posts such as this.

But if you're feeling weird and a bit unsure of yourself, really just ask her! Try to introduce the topic of sex, ask her how she feels about it at all. If she's open to having it in the near future or not, etc.. Once that's out in the air, you can start asking for estimations of when she'll feel ready to take that step with you.

[SarahsSummer]

Well have you initiated it? With this one or the prevouus girls or did they? After her period is over you may want to get more physical. I don't think you should get past the I love you'd, I think that should be a regular part of a relationship but how can you love someone befor even being physical together?

[MargaritaPeach]

Sometimes the more you love someone, the more nervous you are about sleeping with them for the first time.

[Mistnigqa808]

She probably just wants somebody to get all mushy with in her spare time. And here's the funny part tho, since there isn't anything in the rule book saying that she has to "put out" until she's "ready"... you have to just sit around and wait until the time comes. But hey you could always sd.keepcalm-o-matic.co.uk/.../...e-the-bitch-7.png ^_^

[Mistnigqa808]

But here's the funny part tho*

[ThisDudeHere]

The only way to really know is to either sit down and talk about it or try to initiate sex when you can and then see her response (of course respect if it it's not, u can't raep her duh)

[I_am_repulsive]

Something must be holding her back and the only way to know for sure is ask where she sees this relationship going

[NerdInDenial]

Have you asked her, or ask her if she finds you sexually attractive.

[Anonymous]

How far have you gone?

[Asker]

I've fingered her a couple times. That's it

[Opinion Owner]

Was she totally into it? if so yoi have nothing to worry about. She could just be taking her time to get to know you and enjoying the lead up. I love that part of a relationship - enjoying all the little things leading up to the big event and you can't ever go back to the beauty of those presex days when the smallest thing he did to you was really exciting.