Have you ever dated someone too smart for you?

Question

Recently, I have joined the synchrotron club at my college. Almost everyone there is either a physics, engineering or a computer science major. I think some of the guys there are really cute, friendly and nice. I have a huge crush on one of them. But they always like to discuss classical dynamics of spinning tops, relativity and quantum mechanics. All the topics I have zero interest in or too dumb to grasp. One of the dude asked me out on a coffee date. I think he is physically attractive but he won't have any fun spending time with me.

AhGojira · Accepted Answer

Most of the time "smart people", don't talk about "smart stuff"... It's not really a big deal... There are plenty of other things to talk about. We try to keep it simple and fun, because it's not fun making people look stupid when you care about them. Most of the shit that floats around in my head, I can't even talk about with most people, because it's just too much trouble. For example on Easter, one of my brothers asked me something about what I do, and there's just no way he's be able to understand what I was talking about so I sort of dodge the question because I didn't want him to feel dumb (because he's insecure that way) even though he is "gifted"... My other brother didn't spare him and started talking about some other stuff, which I understood, but my other brother didn't... Then he felt awkwardly left out, which I thought was a shitty thing to do to him, but my other brother was happy because I'm the only one in the family that understands his domain on his level, and many people he works with don't even understand him... So, I think "smart people" tend to just try to keep it fun and simple, and then we go to our "crutches", those people that we know understand us, and talk about "smart stuff" with them...

Phoenix98 · Accepted Answer

I've dated people who were quite intelligent in their chosen fields but overall their smart/intelligence was the same as mine. Though I'd have no problem being with someone who was smarter then me overall, as it would only drive me harder to expand my knowledge and further drive my passion of learning, honestly as long as they are humble and don't mind explaining things for me when I get lost I am ok with them being super smart. I find intelligence and being really smart quite attractive actually as long as it's coupled with humbleness.

Azara · Accepted Answer

not knowing something someone else has studied and is interested in, does not mean your dumb or less intelligent. knowledge is not the same as intelligence. nor is interest. you may not get along bc you dont share interest but thats not about intellect. and no one knows everything, its really odd for anyone to be too smart for someone, just people who think they are. these are not good partner material bc they are judging instead of learning from the other. everyone has gift and their own brilliance. we are all unique and all have things to teach. i think its a bad sin if you feel stupid by comparison. he probably is helping you feel that way with his behavior. or you just heaver really low self esteem. but no he's not too smart for you.

JustBeingHonest7 · Accepted Answer

As a general rule there is more to "smart people" than just being smart. He can be smart but share a mutual interest in roller coasters or both love put put. Perhaps one of you can be the book smart and the other the street smarts, etc. There are lots of dynamics.

If you go into it feeling you aren't worth him liking you because he is more intelligent though then you will likely not work out. You bring a unique set of traits to the table. Know your own worth.

existing_not_living · Accepted Answer

Omg, I feel like boyfriend is so much smarter than me. I think we are on the same level, just in different ways, but gosh do I get insecure once in a while. Go on a date with him! He may talk about all those things with other people, but he asked you out so he could get to know you. So let him.

DodgersGM · Answer

Man, I hate to say it, but most dudes don't care much about a woman's intelligence.

Think of it like an upside down bell curve, with 'woman's intelligence' being the x-axis and 'dude's concern about said woman's intelligence' being the y-axis. If a woman is super-duper unintelligent, the guy is gonna get annoyed. If a woman is super-duper smart, the guy is likely gonna care because he'll be intimidated. Most guys like something near the middle.

Married-in-PA · Answer

Yes, this is essentially all female Simians I have ever known.

FAR more cunning, seductive and material. I always lost out with those babes... until I met my Wife. She took pity on me, and gave me incredible Sex in exchange for my total submission. Works for me.

aficionado · Answer

You'll never know! Just go out on a date with him. If he is just with you and not the other supposedly 'intelligent' guys, he may talk about other stuff!

Personally, my dating experience has been very limited, and I don't' consider myself that smart (although I do hold an engineering degree in computer science).

rescuemyheart · Answer

Never. I just ended things with a PhD holding (in mathematics) CEO. And when we were dating he told me I was the most challenging women he'd ever been with. It takes a lot to make me feel out of my depth, these days.

Cosytoasty · Answer

Went out on a couple of dates with a law student, I'm an engineer and I couldn't keep up with her. Her knowledge of literally everything was astounding and she spoke 6 languages fluently. If ever "skill level Asian" was appropriate, it was her.

justbanANNAz · Answer

u could say so. it was attractive but also annoying, not because i was jealous or anything, but because he'd talk on and on about topics he knew i had no idea about.

BarbaraP · Answer

You just have different interests. The fact that you haven't studied physics nor want to doesn't mean you're less smart than him.

Anonymous · Answer

yes probably he won't. as a higher than average intelligence man, with a very inquiring and restless mind, i really can t stand stupidity, BUT dont forget humans are more than a brain. if you can capture his heart or soul if you want, it might work. nothing is impossible... .

SuitAndTie · Answer

You won't know until you go on that date. He could be possibly looking to go out on a date with someone who DOESN'T talk about scientific concepts as he is already surrounded by those type of people everyday. Go get 'em.

BertMacklinFBI · Answer

you don't know if he will or won't.  just try and go for it.

Southern_Shorty · Answer

I have not dated someone too intellectually smart for me, however, too smart alecky is more like it.

Anonymous · Answer

Yepp! I really like one now, but he is too smart. Which I find really sexy. But I'm sure he'd feel dumbed down talking to me Lol I'd love to learn from him but it makes me sad haha

sparkly-crystal · Answer

seriously? go for the STEM majors and STEM majors only. You don't want to be with dumb liberal art or a business major or do u?

Anonymous · Answer

My ex was REALLY smart but it worked out well before he reveal that he had commitment issues and broke my heart!

Dada999 · Answer

I used to think that my crush was too smart cuz she was good at school, turned out she is a dumbass like me

TheSpartan · Answer

No, not really. I think I've met a few people smarter than me, though.

Offthelist · Answer

You may be intellectually incompatible

amazon-boy · Answer

latch onto him. STEM majors are the best!!!

Prince_teddy4u · Answer

I've init dates persons with high intellectuals.

lovebananas · Answer

yes i always like to date up not down

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