I've seen so much hate lately especially by people who have no idea what the arrangement is. Coming from a long term sugar baby let me tell you a few things: -I've almost finished my degree with the financial and intellectual support from my SD -I'm a virgin! Omg i know weird right? Not really don't get mistaken although some girls enjoy sex with their SD some of us aren't up for that -The support system from other SBs is great. I've made long lasting friendships -I've been to 5 different countries before turning 20 -I've learnt how a man should treat you and no I don't mean with money but with respect, kindness and understanding
And of course I've learnt not to judge anyone's choices if they are not harming anyone! :) x
Updates
+1 y
I just want everyone to know wether you think I'm a prostitute, whore whatever I don't mind. We are all welcome to our own opinion and I'll respect that. As long as I don't say anything rude or disrespectful about your choices then I'm happy within myself. :)
Why do people hate the sugar baby/ sugar daddy relationship so much?
Your story is clearly bullshit, you're basically saying that you found a guy who paid for your whole college, multiple trips to other countries and gave you a good relationship and you never even had to have sex with him? Unless you are attractive enough to be a model, which you obviously aren't, then your story is faker than Kim Kardashians ass.
But let me still explain why I this sugarbaby bullshit is gross.
- It is prostitution, you are selling your body in exchange of money/gifts/etc. Just because they take you on a date before hand doesn't change that. The real difference is that whores generally make more money.
- Relationships should not be about money. They should be about your connection, your feelings, sharing things with each other because you truly like and enjoy each others company. These sugar relationships are based on them giving you money and you being eye candy for them/doing sexual things for them and it is just disgusting that someone would mix those things in my opinion.
- It shows what kind of a personality you have, most people have no problem working for their money. Most people get working experience, make connections and build on their future like that. But if your first choice is to be a sugarbaby that just shows that you have no ambition, no work ethic and no morals, it shows that you just want to take the easy way out no matter how morally questionable it is.
And lastly I gotta comment on a certain thing you said: "I've learnt how a man should treat you and no I don't mean with money but with respect, kindness and understanding "
Are you fucking kidding me? Those relationships are completely based on him giving you money and you being attractive for him, if you take one of those things away then the relationship would not even exist. But you talk about "respect, kindness and understanding" You can romanticize this glorified prostitution all you want, but it honestly makes me sick that you would actually compare it to a real relationship. If you get your relationship values from an arrangement that is based on them paying for your company, then don't be surprised when no decent guy wants absolutely nothing to do with you.
And I just wanna say that everyone is free to make their own decisions, if they want to be a sugarbaby or just a straight up prostitute then that's their choice to make. But I would absolutely never get involved with a person like that.
15
5 Reply
Asker
+1 y
It isn't a normal relationship no. It's more of just an agreement he helps me and I make him look good at his work functions which in fact do involve other countries but I respect your opinion x
I'm trying the sugar dating recently. Like you , I need to pay my college fee. Can we become friends or just you become my tutor. OMG ! I desparately need a sugar sister now as I'm totally new to this. I'm scared and don't know what to do next.
I'm trying the sugar dating recently. Like you , I need to pay my college fee. Can we become friends or just you become my tutor. OMG ! I desparately need a sugar sister now as I'm totally new to this. I'm scared and don't know what to do next.
I have dated a couple of guys I met on the dating website from I have to say that it can be really good to have such a man in your life as most men around me are not good partners at all... But it is all up to you, of course...
Honestly if there is no sex then there isn't any prostitution. prostitution is a CRIME! I honestly can believe it. I know this isn't for everyone and it has to be agreed upon. But
my guess is jealousy. guys without stacks of money think "well, that's stupid. If i had stacks of money I could be sleeping with hot girls too". And girls without the body/personality for it think "well, that's stupid. If I looked like that I could be getting stacks of money in exchange for nothing too".
that, or people assume there is manipulation involved, though it's never clear who the manipulator is. I think people tend to assume it's the gender opposite their own - guys think "well she's just using him for his money" girls think "well he's just renting her like a pet"
Really, though, I think deep down everyone just despises money. It's a good concept, but it has been corrupted. The point of money is that it be used as a medium for progressing society, but instead society is used as a means to make more money. Money has transformed from a 'useful tool' to 'the ultimate project,' and the fact that those with the most money do the least work kind of irritates people.
Anyway, perhaps the idea of a relationship based on money seems vacuous to people. That's all I can think of..
I personally think people can do what they want, but in my mind, I was raised to take care of myself and to be totally dependent on my own wit, and more importantly, my own money. Somehow, to me, selling your body/company to a man just comes across as... well, wrong, if I'm honest.
I don't think women should take advantage of the fact that there are men out there who will pay their way just because they're women, and that they should find their own means to be completely independent. What if one day your SD goes from being okay with not having any sexual relations to expecting it? And you refusing cuts off those funds that you depend on to pay your rent and tuition? It pays more to be self reliant in my opinion since not every SD/SB relationship is guaranteed to run like clockwork.
Ultimately, people can do what they want, but the concept to me is off-putting.
3
4 Reply
Asker
+1 y
Thank you for sharing your opinion respectfully I honestly appreciate it. To adress some of the things you've said my current sugar daddy and I have an agreement that if circumstances change I am allowed to at any stage leave if it's uncomfortable with the security he'll fund me for another 3 months. We get what is called an allowance which you probably won't like but I've put aside money each time and he's shown me how to save and invest my money so if we were to suddenly stop our agreement I am still well off. I plan on ending all relations after study it is purely to set me up and get me through the hard times of being a student. He's also set me up with contacts that'll help me in the future going into my career. Saying that I've built a friendship with this man that's irreplaceable so after ending the money side of things I'll still meet up with him every now and then. Contracts are made with some people depending on how comfortable the SD is with that so it's like a secure busin
That's all well and good, I'm not judging you, people do all different types of things to get by, but for how I was raised, I wouldn't be able to do it and feel good about it because I was raised to not accept handouts, which is where my mindset comes from. If it works for you and it's something you want to do, by all means, but for me personally I don't really agree with the concept, but that doesn't necessarily mean I don't understand why people do it.
I was raised by a single mum who worked 2 jobs from the week I was born throughout all my years providing everything herself by hard work amd no support. I understand what you are saying but this way while paying my way through college I'm also able to help my mum out with her bills, car issues and the ocassional treat. I owe her at least that
Because it usually involves either taking advantage of a guy who thinks he'll get sex or, if he does get sex, prostitution. Many other women rely on brains and hard work to get through college - keeping sex for bonding and mutual pleasure, not a financial tool. You basically are reducing your value to only sexual.
It's disgusting because you're using someone. People who use people are disgusting, end of story.
7
2 Reply
Asker
+1 y
Technically not using anyone. He finds it satisfying to be able to spoil and help someone with their future and I go to functions with him to make him look good. If anything we're using each other
I think it reinforces patriarchal norms, and effectively reduces women to commodities or products. Undermines the concept of "love" since the relationship is almost strictly transactional and emotionless, two people using each other for mutual benefit. Probably great if you're a psychopath or something but the idea of buying women seems a tad archaic in the 21st century and somewhat akin to male dominated power dynamics under pre-colonial European feudalism. In a society where the most powerful economic forces/entities exist within male dominated power structures, it seems as if the "sugar daddy" phenomenon is the product of a small group of gentry/oligarchs/trust funds trying to monopolize control over resources that everyone depends on in order to maintain control/power over women (i. e. date me/sleep with me or I will cut your food supply off and then starve you and everyone you love), which seems like a pretty toxic dynamic and arguably an abuse of power by those using it to their advantage, perhaps even comparable to r@pe or coerced sex. Most of the men doing this will probably present themselves as progressive people who respect a "woman's right to choose" and female bodily autonomy, but their actions as economic actors would suggest they are actually the opposite, would those espoused views stay the same if they were just another average guy trying to keep up? They're the same people that will label laid-off factory workers as misogynists for being unhappy about outsourcing and globalization, their entire persona and the image they project fundamentally relies on them forcing others to depend on them while they play the hero, gaslighting and demonizing anyone who questions their methods, including all the women that leave them for being abusive/controlling. If a woman wants to date a power-hungry psychopath because he's rich and powerful, that is her right, but she shouldn't expect sympathy or help if it all goes sideways - biological clocks are still a thing and last I checked we've barely scratched the surface of understanding how to reverse/delay aging, what do you plan to do with the other two-thirds of your life when he leaves you for another 18 year old and no other men will give you the time of day?
The negative opinions offered here are shockingly narrow-minded and not surprisingly from younger men. Far too judgmental, and, I suspect hypocritical, which means envious. That would be my answer to the question asked. I like the SB/SD concept. When I get older and hopefully wealthier I might be OK with an asexual relationship. Right now that would be a deal-breaker, but not the only one. A neutral friendship is another no-no. There would have to be genuine liking, warmth, and an emotional connection. I would not be interested in a purely financial relationship. I save that for my bankers and my favourite dominatrix. Correction. Not the Domme! We have a great relationship even if asexual. (I do not contradict myself. It is still very -ahem - satisfying for us both. Me for sure and I take her at her word.)
As long as what you are wanted is AGREED upon. As long as you love eachother as long as you're good Christians then I have no problem with a sugar daddy/ sugar mama relationship.
Personally speaking it is not for me. Another thing is that
respect, kindness and understanding goes BOTH ways. I know how I should treat a woman but I also have standards on how a woman should treat me.
But using someone for money who did not agree on this is wrong.
You are right. Some leading universities are also helping make this arrangement to help needy students to get money to study and complete their higher learning courses I have got the names of the 10 leading Universities with me. Such things we learn only through such discussions.
because you are leeching of a person financially. thats why. it supports the notion that a guy should support a girl financially. it makes this more socially acceptable. for the majority of men this is simply not possible with this economy.
7
0 Reply
Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
I have a quite a few guys paying me through college and helping me to live quite comfortably. As a high class escort by the time I get my degree and start a career I will be set up for life. Two of my older sisters has done it already.
I don't know if this is true or not but like really... Either you got with the most gullible and stupid rich guy you can find or this isn't true. Besides you're more of a gold digger than a prostitute then.
It is a business arrangement essentially between you and the man - If you are both comfortable with it , well and good but personally I don't think I would be able to do it.
What is pathetic? She graduates debt-free. He gets to fuck a much younger, hotter girl than he would otherwise, no strings (except financial, which he can afford) attached.
Because basically what you're telling me is that you're lazy and incompetent and expect men to take care of you while you sit on your ass all day doing nothing.
6
9 Reply
Asker
+1 y
I literally said I've almost completed my degree. I also volunteer at a nursing home 2 days a week and going straight into a government job after graduating. Haha man he's helping fund my ambitions I'm not doing nothing
So that's what women like to do is seek out older men with money so you can get them to pay for your college expenses? That's sad. You just sound like a gold digger honestly. No matter how you try to sugarcoat the story.
Well if you tell your future partner about it he'll assume you're just with him because he has money. I'm just saying for your sake but of course you should tell him anyway.
well most of the sugar daddy's relationship they both have sex thats why i think people hate it. by the way i really dont care about sugar daddy's or sugar babbies
your bragging says everything there is to know about it. And my personal experiences are beyond anything you can fathom. and at your age you don't know shit about the "long term" of anything-that was the point.
There's no need to be rude. Calm down. When I say long term I am in fact using the term he uses so that's what I'm going by. To be honest I don't give a crap about your personal experiences. Maybe write something up and if I'm interested I'll then comment :)
Personally I don't really care what other people do. If they think it's a good deal - that's their business. However, the very notion that someone should reimburse you for your presence, only costs you in the long run. I'm 43, I live in a college town... I've never found a shortage of young women who have a daddy fetish or simply want an older man for mutual reasons that don't involve money... and I have $, and assets, but I would have to remove all my mirrors if I ever paid for a woman's presence.
I find prostitution a much more dignified transaction. So if I ever did pay a woman-it would be for sex, not her entitlement lol Entitlement is the most unattractive trait a woman can have-as it makes them act like spoiled children. And most young women are not very good in bed... so there's that.
Could you kindly give an exact definition of such a relationship? It would help me to understand your question better and give a good answer. Thank you.
Yeah. So? Is that a problem for you? It is a broad term, and covers kidnapping and sex-slavery and other despicable ugliness, but that is far from the whole story. SB/SD arrangements are about as far from that as you can get! As Asker notes that while financial support is at the crux of it, there is an element of mentoring, of emotional support, friendship, and it is not necessarily sexual.
@KeiranByrne I wrote that it's prostitution. (sex against money) I have no problem with prostitution in a society. (but I don't like it) It's HER body and she's free to do with it as SHE deems good. The sugar daddy should be shamed.
I provide him with company on his work trips and I am his dates to all his work functions. As well as a few other things here and there. He gets lonely and likes the company
@jaquesvol In what possible perversion of any language is 'the sugar daddy should be shamed' a non-judgemental opinion? I will give you the benefit of a typo for 'shamed' in lieu of 'ashamed.' The latter is an emotion, the former a public punishment. You are right about one thing. This is not about me. I don't know this lady or whether I'd like her if I met her. I do know that I have more respect for her than any other participant in this discussion.
@KeiranByrne You're entitled to your opinion. Just look around what sugar daddy-sugar babies arrangements usually are. If this girl has it non sexual, the term sugar daddy isn't a good choice.
Do your research buddy. Go to Lets Talk Sugar the site if you want to keep pretending like you know what you are talking about. Watch some videos on youtube or something look at the different type of sugar babies out there and the different sugar daddys. There are different types of dynamics. It's not all what you hear
That may be hard to believe and trust me I've come across my fair share of criticism and doubt but well I am in fact a virgin. I will save sex for someone I love.
Asker people don't need to worry about your sex life. Save yourself for marriage. When you find the right guy you will know. Your relationships are between you and God and long as you're honest and don't feel convicted then you're fine
Girl's Behavior 
Guy's Behavior 
Flirting 
Dating 
Relationships 
Fashion & Beauty 
Health & Fitness 
Marriage & Weddings 
Shopping & Gifts 
Technology & Internet 
Break Up & Divorce 
Education & Career 
Entertainment & Arts 
Family & Friends 
Food & Beverage 
Hobbies & Leisure 
Other 
Religion & Spirituality 
Society & Politics 
Sports 
Travel 
Trending & News 
Most Helpful Opinions