Went on a 1st date, he accepted my offer to pay? (Page 4)

Question

I know I'm probably going to get some criticism for this question, but I met up with this guy from online dating for brunch, and it went really well. We had a really good conversation and I really liked him.  However when the bill came he put down his card, and I offered to split and he just shrugged and said "sure" (he also ordered something more expensive than me). It's not that I'm "using" him, I'm working full-time at a decent job so I'm definitely not strapped for cash. I was just a bit surprised because I've gone on a ton of 1st dates and usually the guys will wave it off and say not to worry about it when I offer.  He asked me out again but I'm slightly hesitant.. I don't know am I being too traditional? Or would other girls feel slightly weird about this?

Dtegesd123 · Answer

in any case. if someone puts down their card, I'm not splitting it. I'll just treat them next time or maybe the next event of the night. Its a hassle for everyone on a busy night to split.

Anonymous · Answer

The death of every mature "good guy" in a relationship... teenage mind games.

Keenisha · Answer

He could have testing you. But you shouldn't offer if you really didn't want to follow through... I'd go out again to see if he wants to split all the time or if that was one time thing

ProbablyTooMature · Answer

It's sweet that you offered to pay... he shouldn't have accepted though.

darrickducky · Answer

whatever works for you is OK. There is no absolute right or wrong.

Anonymous · Answer

So did you invite him out or did he invite you out? Whoever did the inviting should pay

MsElizabeth96 · Answer

... If you didn't want to split the bill why did you offer?

Anonymous · Answer

Most guys only wave the offer because they expect the girl to be playing games or expecting her to be weird about it or whatever. You're being weird. You should just try get over it.

MaiNameIsSunshine · Answer

You're being too traditional, if you don't feel comfortable paying then don't offer, easy as that...

KatelynxPaige · Answer

Tbh most guys wouldn't do that, girls just like to be polite and offer. Hardly guys hardly ever accept.

stonerboner · Answer

If I ask you out, I pay. That's how I think it should be.

Touchmehxx · Answer

Guys are obligated to pay. It doesn't make them any less 'manly'. You ate too. The whole guys should pay thing is outdated

NalaxLazy · Answer

That sucks XD I usually say lets split the bill o. o or try to do little things to pay him back

janne13r · Answer

If you didn't want pay or you wanted him to follow "tradition" why bother asking

lana3 · Answer

A similar experinece happened to me. I know the way you feel. His behavior is not gentle at all!

Gommers · Answer

You're an idiot. You offered to pay and he took you up. You did this just for a test and you should be ashamed.

sp33d · Answer

Do you enjoy his company?  Yes - go No - don't go Yes you're being traditionally stupid. Do yourself a favor and break the tradition.

Anonymous · Answer

No don't go out with him again. He deserves someone who isn't a cheap ass like you.

Queen_KZ · Answer

Since you offered to split, that's on you. Chances are if he didn't protest at all he may be right on money.

Anonymous · Answer

If you don't like the fact that he accepted your offer to pay then don't offer. Why would you offer if you wanted him to pay?

YourName123 · Answer

I would never do this as a man. So I'm not sure. Go out with him again but if he gives any signs of having been feminized by modern influences... get outta there!

catandmouse · Answer

I wouldn't feel weird being that I would've been the one offering to pay in the first place... probably should have never spoken up, if you didn't want to pay

AddictedGirl · Answer

chill there is nothing bad about that! even my boyfriend does that! not always but yes!

Dipsy · Answer

Don't offer if you don't mean to pay. It's that simple

Saoirse_Nua · Answer

I prefer to split or pay for your own - I think paying for her is archaic and redundant

luvstoned4him · Answer

Nothing is wrong with that. Maybe next time you could take turns.

Anonymous · Answer

It doesn't matter what other girls what feel, it matters how you feel. First dates are important if it wasn't what you wanted move along until you find what is.

cinderelli · Answer

he might've been confused for a second.. and he put his card out to pay.. so he's not a cheapstake.. you're overreacting

shawnski · Answer

If he had asked you to split id say RUN but if you offered then he may have just gone with it because that's what he thought you wanted

ClassicRocker · Answer

I've always wanted to do this. Just once to see how it would play out. I'm a curious guy.

Toad-1 · Answer

Ummm well it's one thing if you had to pay for his meal... but splitting it shouldn't be a big deal at all. not sure why you're making it such.

Wolfstarking · Answer

No you're not wrong you offered to pay and if he said yes and you are ok with that then there's no problem just like one day he can say "don't worry it's on me this time"

thisgirlmika · Answer

It's not weird.  Especially on the first date. Things are a lot different now, and it's really not a big deal to pay for your own food sometimes or even his too.

zagor · Answer

Don't make offers you don't care to honor.

pooper89 · Answer

I wouldn't. He's not a genteman. Or he's a feminist

larry69 · Answer

Men should always pay for 100% of all dates for the woman and the man.

AlwaysBelieving · Answer

So what's the actual question here? First you ask the question then you say "relax people." Just let it go. Damn

Iron_Man · Answer

Sounds good to m, e why do women think everything is now free for them because they have a boyfriend or a husband?

Bullzee · Answer

No need to feel awkward honey. He wasn't man enough to pay for the dinner and you stood up to be am independent woman. Trust me, he should be the one feeling NAD that you paid.

Maxemeister · Answer

Lol u offer to split then u're surprised he agreed?

Princessearth5678 · Answer

Since he accepted the offer. Just go with the flow. Best of luck on your first date! :D

Anonymous · Answer

Maybe he's not experienced enough so he didn't know what to do or something. I think you shouldn't decline a second date for that reason.

JustWorthlessMe · Answer

lol... bluff called... maybe you should have just been honest?

Anonymous · Answer

It would bother me personally, because while I'm not a gold-digger, I appreciate and want a guy that is willing to fulfill that more traditional role of a man.

Benk111 · Answer

don''t do that a lot of guys won't get that if you want him to pay than don't offer to pay after he already agrees to.

alex917 · Answer

On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you measure this in terms of importance compared to the rest of the date? I'd personally give it a zero.

APRU5 · Answer

And your point is? You asked to pay so pay. I think he is smart and not making a big deal of it. And basically what @nog642 said.

COCOCHANEL · Answer

kinda confused about the extra info about him ordering something more expensive. did you pay for both of you?

orphan · Answer

way to create a problem where one doesn't exist.

DreamingScholar · Answer

He probably didn't want to offend you from somehow sounding like you couldn't pay.

Sweetie3423 · Answer

I would go out with him again. You should also look at you paying he can hold anything over you. Lol

itsady · Answer

I think that in this day in age we have the mentality that the man pays for the first date, but if you want to pay then that's your own opinion. But I do think that it might be weird.

Splintercell · Answer

Up to you. Me personally I would still take the bill.

SuicidalTeen · Answer

He would probably be feminized by friends if he told them lol, probably a bit awkward

helloh · Answer

If he asks you out, he pays. Probably, because he doesn't want to hurt your pride (feminism), he lets you split the pay

Melodium3 · Answer

I think that if he's the one that asked you out he should be the one to pay. The responsibility lies with the person doing the inviting.

Anonymous · Answer

Gold digger dump him. Never a real man will accept this offer especially on a first date

Mitosisosmosis · Answer

He feels you are his 2nd half just as good as him so he doesn't mind your offer to pay plus he is saving money.

LunaLawliet · Answer

Haha society is changing.

Went on a 1st date, he accepted my offer to pay? (Page 4)

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