I know I'm probably going to get some criticism for this question, but I met up with this guy from online dating for brunch, and it went really well. We had a really good conversation and I really liked him. However when the bill came he put down his card, and I offered to split and he just shrugged and said "sure" (he also ordered something more expensive than me). It's not that I'm "using" him, I'm working full-time at a decent job so I'm definitely not strapped for cash. I was just a bit surprised because I've gone on a ton of 1st dates and usually the guys will wave it off and say not to worry about it when I offer. He asked me out again but I'm slightly hesitant.. I don't know am I being too traditional? Or would other girls feel slightly weird about this?

Why even ask if you want him to say no? 🙄

He would've probably said no, but some girls get offended by that by the guy not letting them pay

my boyfriend said on our first date when i said id pay for myself: 'convention states that a guy should always pay on the first date' he's perfect

He used u for first date he shouldn't do that he should rejected your offer shame on him… . on first date really !

There's nothing wrong with what he did. You're worrying too much.

You're overthinking the problem. You offered to split, he said yes. That's it.

Well I mean you offered. a guy's mind is simple.

He probably really appreciated it.

Don't offer to pay if you don't want to...

Went on a 1st date, he accepted my offer to pay? (Page 5)

Beach_lover88

Xper 6 Age: 37

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What Girls & Guys Said

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Show Popular Opinions(240)

WhaChaChaKing Follow
Yoda Age: 31

+1 y
542 opinions shared on Dating topic.

Why even ask if you want him to say no? 🙄

12

0 Reply
Popo21 Follow
Explorer Age: 32

+1 y

He would've probably said no, but some girls get offended by that by the guy not letting them pay

0

0 Reply
lollypop1234567 Follow
Xper 4 Age: 31

+1 y

my boyfriend said on our first date when i said id pay for myself: 'convention states that a guy should always pay on the first date'

he's perfect

0

1 Reply
- sedrftvgyhujik
  
  +1 y
  so did you pay after he said that?
  
  Reply
Amina20 Follow
Xper 4 Age: 31

+1 y

He used u for first date he shouldn't do that he should rejected your offer shame on him… . on first date really !

0

1 Reply
- Bhwwvec
  
  +1 y
  This isn't the 1950s darling. Shame for what? For paying for his own meal and not reading her mind.
  
  Reply
Spermdumster666 Follow
Xper 6 Age: 29 , mho 38%

+1 y

Lol you offered to pay.

5

0 Reply
Anonymous
(30-35)

+1 y

There's nothing wrong with what he did. You're worrying too much.

4

0 Reply
sunnywhiteflowers Follow
Xper 4 Age: 121

+1 y

You're overthinking the problem. You offered to split, he said yes. That's it.

1

0 Reply
bente2 Follow
Guru Age: 25 , mho 33%

+1 y
561 opinions shared on Dating topic.

Well I mean you offered. a guy's mind is simple.

4

0 Reply
Mustachekitteh Follow
Master Age: 34 , mho 44%

+1 y
1K opinions shared on Dating topic.

He probably really appreciated it.

4

0 Reply
LittleMissy93 Follow
Xper 7 Age: 33 , mho 37%

+1 y

Don't offer to pay if you don't want to...

4

0 Reply
Jeniferh21 Follow
Xper 5 Age: 31 , mho 40%

+1 y

You asked, he said sure, everything is cool

4

0 Reply
iFarted Follow
Guru Age: 36

+1 y
1.9K opinions shared on Dating topic.

Dont offer if you dont mean it

7

0 Reply
Bruhitslizzie Follow
Xper 2 Age: 23

+1 y

GEt you a guy that's can treat you like a princess and not make you pay for dinner

0

0 Reply
Mrs_Claus Follow
Xper 4 Age: 32 , mho 59%

+1 y

Doesn't sound like a big deal to me😕

3

0 Reply
Anonymous
(30-35)

+1 y

I don't think this is a big thing, but I think guy should pay first.

1

0 Reply
Anonymous
(30-35)

+1 y

Break it off and go find a simp who's more than happy to empty his paycheck on you.

3

0 Reply
helloimcrazy Follow
Xper 4 Age: 28

+1 y

That is great. He respects you wanting to pay.

4

0 Reply
frozenhorizon Follow
Explorer Age: 35

+1 y
507 opinions shared on Dating topic.

Just stop, you're already playing games with him

4

0 Reply
rjroy3 Follow
Guru Age: 36

+1 y

What are you weirded out by? That he said sure?

3

1 Reply
- rjroy3
  
  +1 y
  Not sure. Message. Usually it's 48-72 hours from the last new response. But i believe others can still respond on their own original comment
  
  Reply
RedSkyPurpleSky Follow
Xper 4 Age: 24 , mho 79%

+1 y

if you love or like him It doesn't really matter

2

0 Reply
NajemEddine Follow
Explorer Age: 32

+1 y
546 opinions shared on Dating topic.

and now u are her to nag and bitch about it

5

1 Reply
- NajemEddine
  
  +1 y
  the idiot asker 😁😁
  
  Reply
JessTheMess Follow
Xper 7 Age: 30

+1 y

If he was gonna pay, why offer?

2

0 Reply
Anonymous
(30-35)

+1 y

Have something on you, you can't trust anyone online

1

0 Reply
noahreus Follow
Xper 4 Age: 31 , mho 33%

+1 y

I mean offered to split it... lol

1

2 Reply
- AhGojira
  
  +1 y
  There are girls that lie to appear like they are not greedy...
  
  Reply
- noahreus
  
  +1 y
  Exactly... hoes these days all birds man
  
  Reply
Anonymous
(30-35)

+1 y

Then why did you offer😣😫🙅🙈

7

3 Reply
- Beach_lover88
  
  +1 y
  Because it's the polite thing to do?
  
  Reply
- tyber1
  
  +1 y
  Don't offer to do something that you don't want to do. You're either a nice person or you aren't. Don't just pretend to be nice.
  
  Reply
- Kirah
  
  +1 y
  @Beach_lover88 you know what's really impolite? Offering to pay when you don't mean it.
  
  Reply
mostwomenshouldstfu Follow
Xper 6 Age: 40

+1 y

You're complaining about a brunch tab.

4

0 Reply
Lemongrass123 Follow
Xper 4 Age: 55

+1 y

He asked you out and then didn't pay? He's cheap.

1

5 Reply
- Jager66
  
  +1 y
  She went out with him and didn't fuck him? She's a prude.
  
  That's how disgusting your attitude sounds, just fyi. Time to stop being a chauvinist
  
  Reply
- Lemongrass123
  
  +1 y
  @Jager66 if I ask someone out I would pay. Just the way I was brought up. If you are the asker you pay.
  
  Reply
- Lemongrass123
  
  +1 y
  @Jager66 instead of insulting me why not ask why I wrote my opinion.
  
  Reply
- Jager66
  
  +1 y
  It doesn't matter who ask's, if you accepted to go then you accept to pay your way, if you didn't want to pay then you say no and don't go on the date. This way there are no mind games and each person gives and receives respect.
  
  Ok then fair enough, I'll ask you. Why do you have such a sexist and chauvinist double standard between men and women when it comes to dating?
  
  Reply
- Lemongrass123
  
  +1 y
  @Jager66 I don't. It's okay to disagree.
  
  Reply
Janillhoney26 Follow
Xper 5 Age: 35 , mho 39%

+1 y

If it happens again dump his ass lol

0

0 Reply
Afrochick Follow
Yoda Age: 33

+1 y
769 opinions shared on Dating topic.

LOL.
He wouldn't see me again.

2

4 Reply
- hellionthesage
  
  +1 y
  Wouldn't that be a good thing for him? I mean you offer to pay and then when he does what he thanks you want him to do you throw it back into his face? Clearly you have issues, he was willing to pay you stop him and because he acquiesced in order to make you happy he is the asshole? Yeah that makes sense. This pretty much just proves women don't know what they want and men should never ever listen to them.
  
  Reply
- Afrochick
  
  +1 y
  YES GET BUTTHURT <3
  
  Reply
- hellionthesage
  
  +1 y
  No, I was pointing out how he was trying to pay and she intervened then got upset when he agreed to something she clearly wanted to do. Its moronic. One cannot offer to pay for their half of a meal and then bitch and whine about how they ended up paying for their half of the meal. He didn't expect her to pay for her half of the meal, she offered and he accepted to make her happy (because women the world over keep claiming that they are not exploitive because they offer to pay half then as the asker has proven get upset and offended when the guy accepts). Your misunderstanding here, if you offer to pay (in this situation she specificly asked to pay for her half of the meal, not even the full meal) then you have no right to complain when some one accepts that offer. That's just fucking stupid, if you didn't want to pay don't offer. Period. its really simple. Though personally if she didn't offer to pay then she damn well better contribute in some fashion or another, existing isn't enough
  
  Reply
- LadyTerror
  
  +1 y
  That would be good for him
  
  Reply
Anonymous
(25-29)

+1 y

This is a dumb question...

2

0 Reply
Whaaaaa Follow
Yoda Age: 27

+1 y
396 opinions shared on Dating topic.

Well you offered damn

2

0 Reply
Skadouchebag Follow
Yoda Age: 30

+1 y

Whoever asked the other out should pay. Simple.

1

0 Reply
heavenlyhannah Follow
Xper 6 Age: 25

+1 y

Leave him, he should've wanted to pay full happily

0

0 Reply
KnightinDarkArmor Follow
Xper 6 Age: 39

+1 y

Common to split first date

2

0 Reply
skyfullofstars Follow
Xper 4 Age: 31

+1 y

I mean I guess it's ok, but it's not impressive.

0

0 Reply
JBailey Follow
Xper 4 Age: 37

+1 y

I always offer to pay half

2

0 Reply
madelacroix Follow
Xper 5 Age: 35

+1 y

Dump him

4

0 Reply
Anonymous
(25-29)

+1 y

Look, if you offered to pay, it's all on you.

5

0 Reply
Pilulu Follow
Xper 6 Age: 24

+1 y

Why are there so many who pays date questions?

0

2 Reply
- tyber1
  
  +1 y
  Men and women disagree on who should pay
  
  Reply
- dontknow12
  
  +1 y
  Because men are getting tired of doing most of the work when it comes to going on dates.
  
  Reply
Dog19 Follow
Yoda Age: 27

+1 y

It's fine

3

0 Reply
TokyoGhoulLover Follow
Xper 7 Age: 27 , mho 35%

+1 y

meh free country

0

0 Reply
EdirneCigeri Follow
Xper 5 Age: 36

+1 y

No you're not using him , he is gentleman

0

0 Reply
dudeman Follow
Guru Age: 39

+1 y

Why would it matter.

2

0 Reply
John_Doesnt Follow
Master Age: 35

+1 y
1.9K opinions shared on Dating topic.

To pay for sex?

2

0 Reply
Anonymous
(36-45)

+1 y

real men, pay

4

2 Reply
- sep780
  
  +1 y
  Real men find a solution that's acceptable to both people. Whether that's him paying for it all, her paying for it all, or going dutch.
  
  Reply
- IKenpa
  
  +1 y
  @sep780 gotta agree here, i mean... there are some dates where i split and just never want to see her again :D (sometimes i pay for the whole thing, and then never see her again just to not have the "whos gonna pay convo")
  
  Reply
BigJake Follow
Yoda Age: 34

+1 y
575 opinions shared on Dating topic.

Who cares?

1

0 Reply
Anonymous
(36-45)

+1 y

wow you're an idiot

2

0 Reply
ferhanBlassed Follow
Xper 6 Age: 33

+1 y

Yeah

0

0 Reply

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Went on a 1st date, he accepted my offer to pay? (Page 5)

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