Please HELP: I missed out on young love and I miss my adolescence so bad, it is seriously haunting me in my sleep too. What do I do? 😢😢 💔?

Not only am I living in hell and torture during the day, I am being severely burdened in my sleep too.

Growing up, I never had an actual girlfriend. I still have never had a girlfriend till this day (and I recently turned 22).

But what really bothers me is that I missed out on young, teen love.

Even worse, when I am intimate with a girl, my mind and emotions wants to subconsciencely replicate a teen romance. For example, when I start kissing a girl on the bridge of her nose or wrap my arms around her or show her strong affection, my mind imagines it as I wanted it to be when I was a teenager.

But all I am doing is replicating something she DID actually have when she was younger (what she had with another guy). And I am living a fake fantasy and I am portraying myself falsely. It doesn't make it real.

If she found this out...
Then she would be like, "awww that is cute".

But then my question for her would be, "well then, wouldn't the actual teen romance you had when you were younger even cuter then since it was more legitimate young love and real"?

Does anyone get what I am saying?

Commercials and tv shows that have teen romances even set my anxiety and depression off badly.


Most Helpful Girl

  • This sounds like a major anxiety episode. It's not the thing you're focused on, it's the anxiety itself. My anxiety makes me whirl in perpetual circles on topics like this too. It's miserable. Talk to your doc, and soon!


What Girls Said 4

  • Young love isn't about the age you are, it's more about the age of the romance. Everyone goes through the lovey dovey stages and there's nothing wrong with having relationships a little later. It's fine, calm down and let yourself roll along with it. :)

    • But if I am seeing it like a teen romance, I am seeing it like something she already HAD. So, therefore, if she thinks it is sweet, then how could she not see her actual teen relationship she once had was sweeter? It is counterproductive.

      I can't really explain it. And I get confused explaining it.

    • Hon... She isn't comparing you to her past relationship. If she was, and she thought her past one was somehow better, then she'd leave you. Obviously she's happy with you, you don't need to think so deeply into it! <3

    • But if i am looking at it like a teen romance, what makes it different than the style of relationship that she did have when she was a teen? Except I my mind and emotions is trying to replicate it as such, but what she had in the past was actually a teen romance. Does that make since?

      Back then, you didn't have to imagine it as such because it WAS. But this one I am seeing it like it would be. It is different. But I subconscously do ot too.

      I can't explain it

      Then there comes the question as to what if she is thinking what I am thinking is completely different than what I am actually thinking? Then her feelings would be based on false perception. Therefore, making everything null and void.

  • You're 22 - relax. Life is going to be fine - just as long as you try a bit harder.

  • i know exactly what you mean but it's fine to recreate it. you haven't missed out,
    you're still young !

    • But if I portray the demeanor and affection of that of a teen, she may think I have the maturity of a teen and therefore think our love is like that of a teen. That would be false perception.

      Because in my mind, I am thinking of the romance like that when I am being affectionate. But she may not know that either.

      But even if she did know that, she may think "aww that is sweet". But if she thinks that is sweet, how could she not think the romance she had when she was a teen isn't much sweeter since it was actually a real teen romance, versus mine is a false replication of that?

  • Sounds so tragic. I bet little children in Africa wish they had your problems.

    • But i dont want to be lonely for life either. Even worse, I dont want to have a relationship brought about by false reasoning and perception because then it will be null and void.

What Guys Said 3

  • Well you at least get intimate with girls. I also never had a girlfriend, except I never had as much as a kiss. And all my friends are having sex with girls. So not only did I miss first teen relationships but I missed first teen sex and all that. Right now Im seriosly afraid that I will die one day without knowing what it feels like to kiss somebody on the lips

    • I was intimate with a 16 year old girl when I was 20. We were never in a relationship. It was really just a weekenr fling. But I was living in fantasy land to that whole time. But in a way, I couldnt help it either

    • Still, it means girls are interested in you. Maybe not many but some are. So its not that bad

  • Seriously? your only 22 you still are adolescent more or less lol.

    • But still, when I am affectionate, I think of it like teen puppy love. Does that make sense.

      Except it is not. It is replicating it.

      Versus the puppy love she had when she was a teen was real puppy love.

      Back then, they didn't have to think of it as being teen puppy love, because it was just that. Versus me, I am older but my mind and emotions wants to replicate that.

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    • Except now, you are romanticising about something that was like back then

      But back then, you didn't have to romanticise anything like it would be in the past, because that was the current time.

      So back then, it was more real. Right now, you are referencing the puppy love emotions to that of the past.

      I just feel like i am so fucked.

    • Except I'm not lol I do things literally the exact same way and have had and been with woman who gave me the exact same love in their 20s that they gave in their teens. Not sure what's so hard to understand about that. Or that you can have it.

      But apparently you've blinded yourself to that fact.

  • Ya something like this happens to guys more than women