My boyfriend asked me to choose between him or my religion, what should I do? (Page 2)
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i think that's unfair to suggest that a religion is evil. all religions have good a positive messages. it's up to subscriber to that religion to choose to follow tenets that are "evil". so it's nice that he's concerned about you but he should judge you for you and not the religion you follow.
I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that based on his reaction that you're a Muslim. Hate to break it to you, but Islam isn't compatible with any other values. That's why you always see Muslims rioting, demanding special treatment, etc. Only you can choose to leave that "religion". It shouldn't be because your boyfriend asked you to, it should be because you want to. If you wish to remain, cut him loose so he can move on and be happy.
I'm guessing he's not cool with the way Islam treats women. I couldn't date a Muslim who wouldn't walk away enough to enjoy our life together either.
im a virgin before i met him.. what else does he want from me? im willing to sacrifice my family as in marry him although i will be disown... whay else does he want me to do?
Wake up to your happy and that is a no go with your family. He's concerned that's all.
he's concern about what
Your going to be disowned for your choice. if you were not protected by Western law how would your family be reacting? Could it go so far as honor killing yes it could so he is concerned.
Um-run-don't walk away! This has major control issues written all over it. He should at least be tolerant and respectful of your religion in the same way it seems you're tolerant of his. Tell him that if he can't accept all of you-including your religious beliefs-to take his crusade mission elsewhere.
He should respect your choice of religion, ideology or philosophy. If he cannot do that, he probably is not very good person for you. If he does not accept your identity and what's in your heart and mind, he does not accept you. But don't leave him quite yet, speak with him first about this.
But do you want to keep your religion because you believe in its teachings (it is a good reason to keep it) or because it is expected from you by your family (it is not a good reason)? Whatever you choose, you should choose it because of yourself, not for someone else.
1. Do you know for sure that you would lose someone because of that choice?
2. Is that what your boyfriend found out, true? Internet is filled with biased crap.
Choose what you feel in your heart correct. If your religion makes sense to you and it's what you choose to believe then choose it. Boyfriends will come and go but your region is a part of you, it creates part of your judgement, it's a really important part of you. If your boyfriend makes you happy and you truly think that he's the one, your one true love then choose him. Choose which one you value the most.
What are you religions?
Honestly I think all religions are evil (without intending to be). And this is one of the reasons why. Most likely both religions are completely wrong. But lets not get into that.
Unless you want to marry him, and he puts a ring on your finger, you shouldn't even consider changing religions. Especially if you find religion important to you. It isn't that easy to convert, and unless he is proving his commitment, it isn't worth considering.
I think you should tell him how you feel, that you're fine with not following some of your religions rules/guidelines in everyday life BUT you don't want to lose your family either. So basically let's say you were muslim you wouldn't wear your hijab when you were out together but you would wear it to situations where your family is present.
It's easy as 1 2 3 you choose the Lord Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and savior, It's your salvation that's everything for you. You were put on this Earth by God. There is millions of guys out there your boyfriend can't save you. If you believe the Lord Jesus Christ died on the cross to save you from your sins and you accept him as your personal Lord and savior he will allow you to live forever in heaven once your time is up on earth
thats the problem cause i dont beleive that. Jesus exist do exist. and yes we were all created by God and the mystery to everyone is whos the real God
You're confused there is only one God and that's the Lord Jesus Christ. Pick up the Holy Bible and read it. Start going to church
I'm going to tag my friend @SunnyCaliGirl she can add some words here
u can pick up the Holy Quran and try read that as well
I read the Holy Bible
thats good
Yes for sure ☺
He is being vert selfish if he's asking you to leave something that is very important to you and your faith is what build you before he even came around, I would say he is not accepting you for who you really are and he dose not really truly love you if he can't accept every aspect about you, I am sorry but this is the truth, if he really loved you he would accept you and your faith that is a part of you if he really loved you. Also don't go by what he says go by what the Bible says about relationships and go find a relationship that is healthier, and I mean by that someone that will accept you for you, consult your heavenly father through prayer and talk to your pastor about it.
@SunnyCaliGirl thank you so much for the advise... i really appreciate it...
@SunnyCaliGirl very well said
Thank you and it's s true.
Yes for sure
Obviously that will always be a point of tension.
If your religion means a lot to you, you and him are probably not a good match
Give him up. There are plenty of fish in the sea, and one day you will find that man who loves you for you, no matter what your religion is. It is none of his buisness to judge what you believe in. Please. Dump him. You will be making the right choice.
dump his ass, if a guy tries changing you over religion he's not meant for you! I am Catholic I am a decently strong Catholic but can't stand people who try forcing religion on anyone! number 1 I have a bunch of atheist friends! number 2 I could be friends with a satanic person if they didn't do any of the stuff anywhere near me! I don't care, he's not meant for you
If somebody loves you they will accept all your flaws, this to me is not true love, I also have a different religion from my man but he never asked me to change because he accepted it, even thought I'm Muslim, he is Christian, we respect each others religion and we never even argued about this, actually we talk a lot about each others religion to learn from one another, he also wishes happy Ramadam to my family and I wish marry Christmass to his family.. and this is how things should work.
yes i know.. at 1st we were like. this.. he respect my religion and i respect his.. i even love Christmas so much.. but lately like a month ago he started to be like this.. i dont know why suddenly...
we started out just like you and ur boyfriend
We're together for 3 years now and it's still not an issue, you should talk about it with him, tell him that usually Media makes a mess about everything, it's not fair for him to set such an ultimatum, as if you would be BAD and if you pick him what will change according to him?
Just have a deep and direct conversation with him..
Hope he will find his brain again because he is stupid for putting you in this situation.
yes i agree he can be an idiot sometimes cause he's think he knows everything and i know nothing.. he's being ego selfish and ignorant
Looks like he has no Idea and doesn't know Tish, sorry but he seems dumb to me, TALK TO HIM and don't be scared to state your mind,
yes.. he's too ignorant despite his old age.. i am talking to him now.. discussing again but i feel like slapping him becase of he's too proud of himself
Sweetheart, I hate to say this, but I don't think this is a healthy relationship...
i quarterly or maybe halfly think so as well.. ohh i dont know what to do.. lets just see how.
i dont know your faith
but forcing someone to change his faith
and looking down on their believes is the biggest sin of all time
im a muslim and he's a christian... im a flexible. muslim and he's a devoted Christian
dont do or change yourself for him but for yourself
the most i can be is a flexible muslim.. i can never convert to other religion.. i can accept his religion why he can't accept mine.. and i never bother him with my religion
didn't u ever ask yourself why islam dont allow muslim women to marry non muslim men
Its funny how you say changing the faith of someone is a sin, considering how a lot of religiond have that rule about either converting people or killing them.
@Piluex misconception
There is no compulsion in religion
Al-Baqra Verse No:256
indeed.. I wish he can open his eyes and mind and accept what other people said..
he sees himself right all the way u can't fix that
You don't get everything you wanted in life.
But in your case I'd suggest you choose your family. If your boyfriend forces you to choose something like that, he isn't worth it.
If someone gives you an ultimatum like that they don't really love you. Leave him.
Thing is though, she's also saying that "I will lose my family if i choose him, even if he converts to Islam and I wanna marry him, I will still lose my family cause my family don't want a black guy... so either way I will lose my family". So she's already effectively got an ultimatum like that from her family as well, and that ultimatum makes it sound as though they don't love her either.
What a controlling jerk, move on and you'll soon find someone who is more compatible to your views, opinions and religious beliefs.
Sending you Love, Hugs and Good Luck for your future happiness. x
Giving up your religion is giving up a part of yourself: what you believe, value, and how to you see the world.
Is he really worth giving up that big a part of yourself?
true what u said... i think i know what to do now
thanks by the way
I've been going through the same conundrum. You're welcome.
what did u do when u going through things like this?
Haha, going through is the key words*
I haven't finished yet... If you want to message me, that'd be awesome.
If he's not happy with who you are then he doesn't love you. At first it may be just religion but who's to say he will stop there?
Two people of different religions can love each other as long as they accept each other for who they are and the choices that they make.
Choose your religion. I don't care what you believe - only a terrible person would ask you to give up your religion for the.