Summer fling - over. Is he as heartbroken as I am? How do I get over it?

So here's the story. There was a guy who lives in the town I go to for the summer- a beach town. He was there last year, and at the time I thought he was so attractive, but he never approached me so I went on with my life.

This year I went back, and saw him the first day because he works in front of the hotel I stay at. He started talking to me and my friend. Now he said he was interested in my friend, and kissed her that night. We kept seeing him and his friend for 3 nights, until my friend left.

Once she left, I thought that would be it because he was interested in her. However, I ran into him with a group of his friends, and he invited me out with them. I felt bad for ruining his plans with his friends, but he insisted that he wanted to make my time left pleasant. (I had 1 month left).

We went on a walk and long story short, he told me he actually liked me blahblahblah. And he kissed me and we continued to see each other, and eventually he told me he was falling in love with me. I ended up losing my virginity to him, and he knew it was my first time and all. Last night I left the seaside.

I am heartbroken. I can't stop thinking about him, can't stop crying. Everything reminds me of him, music, sounds, words, facial expressions, everything. Clothes that I wear..

Is it affecting him like it's affecting me?! We don't have any form of communication- he has my email and skype but hasn't said anything yet.

HELP ME! / How do I get over him?

Oh, and he called me his girlfriend etc, we were together for a month and when I left he said he would see me next year.
One more thing: I know he sounds like a player, and that's what I thought the whole summer: that he was playing me. But I thought he was, he would have stopped hanging out with me when I wouldn't have sex with him. I made him wait 25 days for the sex. IDK
*if he was


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well it is as you described, just a fling. But giving yourself totally to a man you are not sure of ever seeing again is bad. I mean for a guy to move from your friend to you, shows warning bell signs to me. I would not let a man near me that kissed my friend and was interested in her out of respect for my friend and myself of course. You got carried away by the moment, by him by the sights and sounds of that place. But having said that, you may not likely to hear from him at all. He has these opportunities meeting new people all the time, coming and going and that is what he just does.

    As to getting over it, you will. You just need to be patient with yourself. Go out with friends, join groups/clubs and meet new people. Don't contact him. Just get on with your life, I am sure he is getting on with his.

    • I had sex with him in the first place because I felt ready as a girl to do it, and I also thought not seeing him again would be good- only have good memories with him etc. I did definitely get caught up in the situation, normally I would have never touched anyone who had kissed my friend, though she wasn't interested in him at all so that changed it a little too.

      I'm more over it now though, I was exhausted and thought about it and how the fling was that- a fling.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Move on and find someone new...rebound relationship


What Girls Said 1

  • i don't know if he is feeling the same way... cause I mean I feel like he was just deciding to hit on both of you since you're new there. and he kissed your friend and alll and once she left he went to you. I don't know seems like a player to me..but maybe I'm wrong... I'm not an expert..just saying my point of view

    • Hmmm I see... did he ask you for sex?

    • Yeahh. From day 1 he asked me to have sex, and I told him I was a virgin and that if he wanted sex he could find another girl. He told me that it was OK, and that he liked me and didn't care if we had sex or not. I ended up initiating the sex and had to convince him it was all good.

    • But that's the trick guys always play to get you in bed...they say they love you that they only wanna be with you and than BAM! when you least expect it they take your virginity