Boyfriend posted a picture of a naked girl in his bed?

[Anonymous]

I think jumping to the conclusion that he was cheating wasn't completely wild, as he posted a picture of a naked girl in his bed, who wasn't me.

But, I've taken a couple of deep breaths, and here's the thing: I don't know exactly when it was taken. (It could be his ex, though I'm not sure how much better posting a nude of your ex while you are with someone is.)

How would you feel if you saw this? What would you do?

I'm not completely attached to this man, so I'm tempted to leave now, but I know that an honest conversation might be better. I don't know if I want to have that conversation, though.

I'm supposed to be meeting up with him in two hours; please help!

[dogbert444]

Ask him to EMAIL (!) you a copy. Then examine it with an app called Photo Exif Editor. As long as the photo has not had its exif data deteted AND it is a. jpg or. jpeg photo, it will tell you WHEN it was taken, and other info. It must be sent by email and must be a copy of the original.

Want more info, see my profile which shows a Mytake I wrote about hidden data that can be given away with photos!

[dogbert444]

Oops! *deleted... in second line!

[Asker]

This is extremely helpful! I followed you so I could be able to see the MyTake!

[dogbert444]

No problem!

[Logorithim]

Ask him about it (calmly). It seems like a very immature thing to do, even if he is only 18 or so. If you don't like his answer, there's no need to stay with him, as you point out.

[Asker]

Thanks for the answer! If I technically shouldn't know about the picture, how would I bring it up? (His friend sent me the link and a screenshot; it's the only reason I know about it.)

[Logorithim]

In that case, don't say anything about it. You're likely to cause more problems by mentioning it than you could ever hope to solve. See if it's noticeable the next time you're in his room. His friend shouldn't have sent to it to you, especially if he didn't know the context.

[Asker]

I see where you are coming from. Thanks for the different opinion; it helps me look at it from multiple different perspectives. I appreciate it!

[cinderelli]

I think you should leave.. don't spend any more time with someone like him

[Elviran]

Bring it up talk to him that'd the only way u can get the real truth

[Jo1991]

Ask him. But for me it's inexcusable. I'd break up with someone who did this to me. Why keep those kinds of pics of your ex (if it is his ex)? And if it's someone who was in his bed now, why was she there while you guys were together. I know I said ask him but I hope that you aren't easily convinced cos if he is guilty he will try to lie his way out of it

[Asker]

I agree. I'm tempted just to not play around. It's not that serious of a relationship and I don't really think we'd have much of a future. And, I would ask if I knew how -- technically I shouldn't know about the picture, as he posted on an account where I wouldn't see. (His friend sent me the link and a screenshot.) So, it feels like he is already kind of playing games to me; I don't know.

[Jo1991]

If you don't have much invested into the relationship then I'd suggest cutting ties really. The question you have to ask is what benefits am I getting from the relationship and do the benefits outweigh this dodgy behaviour?

[Asker]

I'm tempted to just say it's not working out -- leave this whole situation out of it; I just don't want the drama of it all.

It's just hard. There were times where he truly cared for me and my well-being, even in the short time we've been together, and he seemed like he liked me (though, now I'm questioning it). But, there were odd signs -- I only ever go over to his house, and he actually asked my friend out before he asked me.

Like I said, I just don't know if I want the drama of it all.

[Jo1991]

Yeah doesn't sound like the drama is worth it sadlt

[Jo1991]

*sadly

[Groisu]

Talk to him see what his excuse is and if he says something clearly sketchy as fuck then leave his ass

[Goldenscar]

Ofcourse you confront him. Relationships are about communication and there seems to be a serious lack of communication here.

[Asker]

I agree! The thing is, he posted it on a second account, so I wouldn't see it -- his friend sent me the screenshot and link. So, technically, I shouldn't know about it. It'll seem like I've invaded his privacy, or it'll put a test in his friendship with that friend if I do bring it up!

[Goldenscar]

His friend did the right thing and is clearly worried about you. I would do the same in his position. If it means losing a friendship for someone not to date a scumbag cheater so be it, I doubt I would want to be their friend anyway.

[Asker]

I'm definitely very grateful for his friend, for sure. It was a kind thing to do. How would you suggest that I open up communication, if it was something he was deliberately trying to hide?

[Goldenscar]

A very good question

[Goldenscar]

You could just say his friend sent something to you that you'd like to talk about, and show the messages if he himself doesn't already know what's up

[Asker]

That sounds smart, though I'm going to try not to throw his friend under the bus. (I'll make sure the name and number isn't visible when I show him the messages.) Thank you for the answer. I appreciate the help!

[Goldenscar]

No problem, you could also ask for advice from the friend who showed you the picture

[cpich7uj]

I would ask him first.
Anyway, I would never post a pic of a naked girl on social media, even if I had her consent. Once online it stays online, and there's a good to fair chance of misuse.

[Asker]

I completely agree with that.
Here is my question: how would I ask him about it, if I knew he was deliberately trying to hide it from me?

[cpich7uj]

How did you discover it?

[Asker]

His friend screenshotted the post and sent it to me, along with a link.

[cpich7uj]

Then I would tell him that someone showed it to you (you don't need to tell him who it was) and you were just curious how it was and when it was taken.

[Asker]

Yeah, I wouldn't want to expose his friend. I'm just torn. I'll definitely take your advice into consideration; thank you!

[cpich7uj]

Good luck!

[Blacktino1316]

talk about it so that you dont regret it it could be a misunderstanding. once its cleared up then make a decision

[Dinnye001]

Well, tear him a new one. Then ask questions. This is totally unaceptable whether it is an ex or cheating. You might want to break up.

[Asker]

I'm definitely very tempted to break up, as we haven't been together very long, but I'm still hesitant. How would I bring it up, if I knew he was deliberately trying to hide it from me, though?

[Dinnye001]

I would just show him the image then leave without a word. Or if the image is not available, confront him, tell him not to fucking lie then proceed to break up. Trust me - you don't want to be involved with a guy like this. Do you need reasons or you'll accept the "wisdom of the not-so-young-any-more fox"?

[Asker]

I do trust you, haha. I honestly came to GaG so someone could talk me out of my initial reaction to leave, so I definitely agree that I wouldn't want to be with a guy like that.

[Dinnye001]

The breach of trust is a one time accident. If it happens, the relationship is over.

[Asker]

Thanks for the answer. It helped a lot. I think I'm just going to leave, without making it a big deal, honestly.

[Dinnye001]

So what happened?

[Asker]

I'm currently attempting to do my make-up perfectly and put on an outfit that accentuates my figure to the T, so when we meet up in about an hour, I'll look better than the girl in that picture when I either bring it up, or just say I want the relationship to end. (I'm still going back and forth about the confrontation part.) Is that too petty, haha?

[Dinnye001]

No, he deserves it.

[Asker]

I'm pretty sure I was just stood up, though. Well, what can ya do?

[Dinnye001]

Nothing at this point. How did it go?

[Asker]

We were supposed to meet but he hasn't said anything, or contacted me. So nothing has happened. RIP, oh well!

[Dinnye001]

So much for shoving it to him. Probably for the best though.

[Asker]

Probably. Though I didn't want to have to end it over the phone, I think that's what will have to happen. Thanks for the advice, again.

[Dinnye001]

So? What happened? Sorry, I'm curious xD

[Asker]

Haha. No, I'm glad to have someone to talk to about it, who I don't feel like I'm burdening. So, thank you, really.

He hasn't messaged me at all since around 9 PM Tuesday, but he has been on steam and in discord, so I just don't know. Maybe he knows that I know he posted that pic? Maybe after posting it, he realized that he didn't want me anymore? Who knows?

It feels like this relationship will just be going out with not a bang, but a sizzle.

[Dinnye001]

It's already out IMHO. Happy to help. Always glad to give advice so if you have any problems, you know where to ask.

Honestly I enjoy helping people. My life is socially boring so it's always good to analyse situations.

[baconbitz14]

You should get back at him any guy that sends something like that is asking for it

[TylerTheViking]

Definitely not a good thing to do. I'd being asking some other questions like why does he have them and if he''s posting there nudes, will he post yours

[Mcluven]

The guy has balls. But that is very worrying that its his own bed and not a pic from the internet

[Asker]

Yep. It's definitely on his bed, haha.

[Mcluven]

Then dont stress there are lotsa other guys that will share their bed with you only

[xtrissiex]

Confrontate him with the picture, if he has a good reason

[JohnTBarnesIII]

Is it sexual or artistic?

[Asker]

Somewhere in between, possibly?

[JohnTBarnesIII]

I guess you would have to be the judge of that since I cannot see it. Although, you should be able to tell, I think.

[marwan1993]

He will lie 😏

[AlexDelux]

Is he an idiot?