So do y’all think FWB’s always end up catching feelings? If so, who do y’all think usually catches them? The girl, the boy, or both?

[Anonymous]

I have a friends with benefits that I’m really enjoying!!! We seem to be getting closer everytime we get together! We don’t text everyday lol & im kinda glad in a way bc I’m not tryna catch feelings lol! We used to text everyday, now it’s maybe every other day!! We get together to have sex once a week! Usually on a weekend night! I flirt with him a whole lot cuz he’s so sexy & I just love how he touches me & sexes me lol but I’m tryna stop myself from catching feelings!! But what y’all think about FWB’s? He doesn’t seem like one to catch feelings easily lol! He’s one of those guys that likes multiple chicks haha! I’m just having fun with him! :)

[Mandycandy42]

Sounds like the kind of guy thats good for a friends with benefits. Best thing to do in my opinion is take my approach, with my FWBs, (I have two currently) the extent of the conversations and actions are ONLY about sex, meet ONLY for sex, chat/sext if it ONLY leads to sex. Get together, have sex, maybe get food/delivery if hungry, do the deed, and after you both are done, get dressed and LEAVE. No contact until the next time you want to have sex. No casual conversations about his day, work situation or long date like outings, If he wants to talk about what he does with other chicks fine, but only sexually how it relates to performance in bed. IF you feel your feelings are becoming complicated thats the time to end it as it will also impact your sex life with him. Keep up the hot sex, its great with a friends with benefits especially when no feelings are involved, just understand the warning signs of feelings

[Asker]

Get it girl!!! U have TWO? Get it boo! I ain’t mad at ya!! Yes he was telling me about the time he had a threesome & the time he had a foursome & I was so into his story lol! I was like “tell me more about this foursome!” Lol! He loves sex & so do I but girl he is so sexy!! Like just from the way he talks, to the way he dresses & even how he makes me feel! I’m already very confident when it comes to sex, but he makes me feel even MORE confident! Like I be trying things while I’m giving him oral, that I’ve never even really thought of before ! But he was texting me everyday! & now that we text every other day, we talk about work, life, & what we’re doing at the moment & sex ! I’m crushing on him, I won’t lie, but in more of a lustful, sexual way honestly cuz I know I would NOT date him, EVA lol! I think he’d cheat on me if we were together tbh bc he doesn’t really believe in having only one girl lol! So ima dodge that bullet & just have fun with him!

[Mandycandy42]

yes I have two, they don't know about each other but I have one unless the one isn't available haha if you can keep those feelings in check, always play it safe (use condoms and/or get tested) and just go with it understanding his situation. Remember he's using you for sex, and you're using HIM for sex. I'd stay away from the life discussions and keep it to the sex, at least he's honest with you,

[Asker]

Oh snap girl lol! I feel u!! I be wanting two sometimes!! Bc the one I have now isn’t always available & I be wanting my sex lol!! We don’t use protection tho!! I need to start for sure! I think he’s starting to like me tho cuz he doesn’t text me as much as he used to & he’s probably realizing that we don’t need to text everyday & only need to text about sex!! & he asked me how many dudes have I had sex with lol! & he was telling me that people think he got all the hoes & how he doesn’t & how he really stays to himself if he isn’t with family or some friends ! He also told me he doesn’t think he’s attractive lol ! Like I feel like we’re going towards a little more than FWBs but I wouldn’t date him bc he doesn’t believe u have to only love one person! Ima save myself from that heartache lol! I just gotta get used to him not texting me everyday!! Cuz we aren’t together lol!

[Mandycandy42]

Thanks for MHO! That sounds awesome and very hot dynamic between you two. Also it's very nice that he's able to open up to you and drop that macho man playa image he's trying to project. Keeping all of that in mind and how he's also being honest at his preference for multiple partners its best not to carry it into a relationship, unless you do so with an expectation he might find a girl on the side. Oh and if you aren't using protection also prepare that you may one day carry his baby then you could never really leave him lol!

[Asker]

Lol you’re welcome girl! & me & him are back to texting daily!! He told me that he likes me a lot & he has caught feelings! Lol I know I’m not gonna date him! But we have such amazing sex & we also have amazing convo! We always have deep convo & then it just automatically leads to great sex.. it’s so sexy lol!! & girl nope, we aren’t using protection & our only BC method is pulling out so far lol! I know that’s not smart to do, but I’ve been researching different birth controls & im thinking about getting the Mirena IUD!!

[abc3643]

Yes, that ALWAYS happens.

[Asker]

From both partners?

[abc3643]

I don't know about that. All I know is that I have had dreams involving women that I have found attractive or emotionally attached to. My one girlfriend dumped me 26.5 years ago and I still dream about her a lot.

[abc3643]

Sorry wrong question.

[Asker]

Lol it’s okay