I can't date a girl who slept with a lot of dudes, can someone change my mind? Or are you the same? (please please please read the full description)?

I can't date a girl who slept with a lot of dudes, can someone change my mind? Or are you the same? (please please please read the full description)?
I'm a virgin and never dated before, and not looking to date for a while. But I've got this thing I can't exactly explain towards women who slept with a bunch of dudes that makes me sick to my stomach (please keep reading). When I do start dating, I'd prefer to be in a relationship with another virgin or at least someone who slept with no more than 2 or 3 different guys. I don't think I could be in a relationship with someone who had sex with over 5 different guys, I just can't. Whenever I think this way, I tend to think I'm being narcissistic, insecure, and setting my standards too high. I try to be more open to it, BUT I JUST CAN'T FUCKING DO IT! The reason I think this way is because I (personally) tend to think women who slept around a lot are a lot are most likely to cheat. I'm not that stupid, it was actually scientifically proven that people with more sexual experience are more likely to cheat. If I were dating someone who slept with a lot of other dudes before me, I'd be too worried that she might think that one or some of the other guys are better than me and might consider going back to them or her old sex lifestyle behind my back. Also, I'd think she might have that Barney Stinson "bang'em then forget'em" attitude. Plus, I tend to think women who slept with little to no people are cleaner, but thats an arguable statement. But these are worries I just can't have on my shoulders and I'd have to call it off with her. I'd feel very horrible and narcissistic about it, but I just can't have it and I have to put myself first at those times. OK my space limit is running out, so I'll finish. This isn't hate against women who did sleep around a lot. This is just me trying to see what other people think and maybe someone will come with a very valid point that will change my mind, but I doubt it. Or if other people think the same way an it turns out I'm not the only one who thinks this way.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I had a friend recently go throug a similar internal struggle. I asked a series of questions.

    Whats wrong with enjoying casual sex while single? Enjoying casual sex doesn't diminish the sexual experience when its with someone you love. Or what if they simply have had multiple dedicated relationships? Would you judge someone for having sex when they're in a mutually exclusive relationship? Whats the difference of sitting on 50 different dicks vs the same dick 50 times? Nothing. Would you want them to judge you for maybe sexting, masturbating or watching porn? Would you want them to judge you for having no experience?

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    • Whats wrong with enjoying casual sex while single?: Nothing, it just I prefer a woman who would only give sex to someone she truly loves just like I do.

      What if they simply have had multiple dedicated relationships?: If she had that many dedicated relationships and was around my age, then what saids our relationship would last any longer than the other ones.

      Whats the difference of sitting on 50 different dicks vs the same dick 50 times?: The difference is that a woman who sat on 50 different dicks is a slut (actual definition) and a woman who sat on the same dick 50 times proves she holds her body to a higher standard, which I prefer.

      Would you want them to judge you for maybe sexting, masturbating or watching porn?: Sexting who? And don't everybody masturbate and watch porn.

      Would you want them to judge you for having no experience?: In a way, yes, I'd want her to know that I'm not a liar and I wouldn't cheat on her because I don't hold sex as a top priority in life.

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    • Almost everything

    • Everything? All I did was answer your questions and I explained my preference as well as my lifestyle and personality. Sorry if it came off as a bit arrogant to you. I actually appreciate you trying to give me a different viewpoint to look at, but its just not working.

Most Helpful Guy

  • nothing wrong with you being a genuine guy & not a nasty player,
    lot genuine guys do think of that at your age specially if a virgin, you have notice part of the fear is from you being a virgin & thinking they have the exp, I agree with how nasty when sleep around, but sometimes nice girls get used a lot, remember a player will lie ass off & act right way till gets what wants, so if by chance has been with mayb 3-4 by your age is poss just been used, if been more you have look past that if they have changed & smarter & a nice girl, no human is perfect, what you want to look for is that takes relationship serious, only flirts with you, did she want serious before & just taken advantage of, also don't look at them as a object which is what doing when think only of how many been with, because that's how make them feel, you need to look at real her,
    all the players interested in is getting what want so see as object,
    is no real fear to have of being a virgin, its always about being able talk honestly to each other that the real difference,

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    • Thanks, you have a good point. But I was mostly talking about the girls who slept around a lot because she was a part of this "hook up culture" and then try to settle down after she's had her fun. Also, of course nice girls get taken advantage of, just like how nice guys get taken advantage of too. I mean, if she was tricked into having sex once or twice, thats fine, we all make mistakes, but if she allowed herself to be taken advantage of like that more than once or twice and haven't learned the first few times, then I'd question her intelligence and critical thinking skills. Not that mine are perfect. Anyways, thanks for your opinion, it helped.

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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 3

  • This is a genuine concern of yours. And no you are not narcissistic. Your standards are not too high or impossible. This is just an excuse by those who can't do with cheating others.
    I think this way too. And to be sure I avoid girls popular among males too much. They think it is alright but it is not

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  • Who cares if she sucks your dick then never talks to you again?

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  • That’s most girls though, a girl who isn’t a ho is extremely rare to find

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