If a girl ask you "what are we" does that mean she wants a relationship?

Been dating this girl for like 7 weeks and got the what are we question yesterday. Does that mean she wants me to be her boyfriend? I'm new to this dating thing If a girl ask you
  • She wants to be your girlfriend
    Vote A
  • Other
    Vote B
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Updates:
Apparently girls seem to think 7 weeks is a long time to date with out a label. I don't feel like it is and I don't think it's smart to rush things. What do you guys think what would be a long time for you?

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Most Helpful Girls

  • She probably wants to call you her boyfriend after 7 weeks of dating.

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    • 😂lmao

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    • I saw the comments before reading your description. 😂I thought she was being dramatic at first but sshe was serious.

      I do find it funny I’m sorry.

    • Thanks for MHO.

  • She probably does. 7 weeks is a long time to decide if you should be official or not.

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    • Really? So what's a normal amount of time? I don't see the point of rushing into anything. I told her I like her but I feel like it's too soon to put a label on it.

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    • @anberlincanucks i was talking to my girl about it yesterday, she told me the exact same thing you did and it was the whole reason she wanted to take things slowly, i'm fine with it since i want to keep her for as long as possible but i just found that kinda funny you mentioning it here.

    • No one said anything about a timeline, but usually if you're dating around 2 months and no one has decided to make anything official, that's when a lot of people just start losing interest and look elsewhere. Why invest time into something that's not progressing? She clearly asked because she wants to know if she should continue investing her time into this.

Most Helpful Guys

  • If she just wants sex, she never asks that question.

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    • Response to update: if she is looking for a partner for a long term relationship, how much time should she invest in you before learning if you are interested in the same goal?

      PS REALLY don't understand the down votes!

    • I told her I'm not apposed to a relationship. I just need to time to really get to know each other first. If I'm going to get into a relationship I need to know it's going to last. We don't get to see each other often so it's taking time.

  • She's testing you where you two are relationship wise.
    If you say "I see us as boyfriend and girlfriend" or "a couple" "partners in crime" you most likely gonna be a couple.
    You can ask her the same back if you don't want to answer first.
    Or tease her with a joke answer something like "fuckbodies" "enemies" "fools" and give her a wink 😉 and a smile😊

    The question is are you in the same place as her with your emotions or haven't it developed as fast as for her (if it needs more time to develop, say it and that you are on the right track, otherwise she might think you are using her. a lot of girls get those ideas with interpretations).

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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 42

  • She may be thinking that she has developed more feelings towards you than she should. She wants to know if you feel the same way or she should tone it down before getting heart-broken for having feelings towards someone who may not feel the same way. Also, look at your actions with her, if you are sending her mixed signals and flip-flopping her between friendship and relationship while on the other hand she may look for a relationship in the long run.. then you are doing a bad job considering her feelings and your actions. It's not that she wants commitment so early on, she just wants to know where your head at because if you only want friendship then she will stop and need you to stop to flirt.. if you think she's great and may have the potential of being your girlfriend, then show so and tell her so. These types of women need words of affirmation. They need to hear things and not just assume because they may be more vulnerable when it comes to investing time and emotions towards someone because they end up getting heart-broken easily too.

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  • After 7 weeks of seeing each other she definitely has a right to know where she stands in your life and the direction you both are heading in. One may assume that you're together, but she just wants the confirmation. Girls need to hear it. Especially if the lines are blurry, meaning you've been giving off mixed signals.

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    • "What are we?" in girl translation is "Am I your girlfriend, or just a fling?". And with her asking such a question its safe to assume she would like to be your girlfriend or quit wasting her time.

  • what she wants is clarity. relationships are hard, i know i’ve been at that tough “what are we” stage before, it’s hard to act like you love someone not being 100% sure that they even want the same back, it’s a frustrating and viscous period because you don’t know if yourself or them are ready for that commitment or even want that relationship.

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    • Your wise for being so young wow

    • thank you a lot, that means a ton to me. as far as being wise goes haha i still have a lot to learn from life, i’ve just been through a few things you could say. i’m really shocked and happy that you think so, most people automatically disregard anything because of my age.

    • Your welcome and that is true but you young ones are the future and a lot smarter than we think it would be more unwise to underestimate you guys if anything

  • She wants you to make things clear and to know how much she should act in this "relationship". I think she probably wants to be more serious otherwise she wouldn't concerned about defining the relationship. Just tell her the truth, whether you want to be in a committed relationship or if you need more time to get to know each other better.

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  • It's exactly like what prettynormal wrote/ type. We just what to know where you stand. Most of us we still want a stable life, some exclusive girls like to go for rides. But for girls that do ask you that, we just want to know how much we should commit to you.

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    • 3-4 weeks is thinking space.
      5-6 weeks will be going steady.
      7-8 week is time to announce about you and her.
      Any longer and you will start to Los her and her interest.

  • It means she wants to know where things are headed between you and her especially if you been on multiple dates and been hanging out with each other for months on end. She just wants to clear any confusion and get a straight answer as to weather you want a serious relationship with her or not.

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  • If she doesn't know what you guys are the lines can be blured are you a couple are you casual or are you just friends with benefits... in which case she may have others knocking on her door she would like to have fun with
    Or she may want to date you and only you.
    How about you clear it up for her and tell her want you're wanting

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  • I would recommend asking her what the comment means to her (as it might mean different things to different people). 😊

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  • I mean, not necessarily. She's most likely confused and a bit curious on what the two of you are considering you've been dating for 7 weeks, which is a while.

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  • Could be. She also might just want to understand her boundaries and such. Usually a girl has feelings when she asks this and is possibly feeling a little disorented in regards to what she can do if you haven't defind your relationship yet.

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    • Reply to your update:
      Just be straight with her. She wants to know if she's wasting her time or not. Have you had sex? Are you seeing other people too?

  • Generally, she's probably hoping you will say 'dating' in response.. if a girl did not want to date you it's unlikely she would ask your opinion on the status of the relationship. She wouldn't let the possibility you could be dating either now or in the future up to question. She would simply say something that would imply you are not dating.

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  • She wants to know if you are friends with benefits because that is all you seem to want off her.

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    • Your talking about Me?

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    • Exactly I need to know her well before I commit. Maybe 7 weeks is a long time apparently but we don't get to see each other often. so I guess it's taking a bit of time to really get to know each other.

    • It only can be considered long if one or both of you think so. Don't worry about what anyone else thinks. People rush into marriage quickly without any long engagements and wind up divorced just as fast.

  • She most likely does. 7 weeks are a pretty long time to make up your mind so the answer shouldn't be too hard for you to define

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  • She wants to know where you stand. She also wants a serious relationship and is hoping you want the same, but she truly just wants to know.

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  • Either she wants to be with you, or she is feeling out where you are in the journey of your relationship. Girls generally know if they want to Pursue a guy or don’t after the first meeting. We think of so many steps ahead. She just wants to know where you are.

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  • Well I look at it this way for myself. If I'm investing time into you I obviously like you and want it to grow into more. But I need to know your head space and "What we are."

    People say they hate labels now. But I think they overthink what the hell a label it. It defines and let's you know what something is. If I'm just a friend I know to act in a friendly manner. If I'm your girlfriend I can allow myself to act more romantically and feel for you. And etc. I think she just wants to know where you guys stand so she knows how to proceed with whatever you guys are. Just sit here down and talk to her about your feelings. That's all she wants to know I think.

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  • Haha someone asked that to me a few weeks ago.

    I think she wants to know what is your relationship with her, like she wants assurance. " She wants to know if you just friends or a more than just friends. " so that she will know if she has a chance.

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  • Could be, but it also could be you made her feel used or something similar and now she wants to know what she means to you

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  • Maybe if you have the conversation with her you'll find out... But it looks like she might want to be exclusive

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  • Who decided there was timeline? One thing you learn as you get older is that great things take time. Relationships that start fast end fast. I’ve been seeing seeing a guy 9 months and no relationship because we want to build new to build a solid foundation of friendship before pursuing a relationship pursuing a relationship so we have something to stand on when we crack and break. Take your time. Just tell her you want to build something solid, that you want to build it with her and enjoy the ride and make memories. THE strongest foundations don’t need labels labels

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  • Lol yes or might just be confused on what you guys are but more than likely interested

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  • She generally curious and doesn't want her time wasting

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  • No. She’s just asking you how you feel. If just friends, fine. If dating, fine.

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  • Yeah she wants to know the status of your guys like are we in a relationship or nah?

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  • She probably wants to know the status of your relationship, whether you're a couple or only friends with benefits and what she means for you.

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  • She either wants tou to be her boyfriend or she is genuinly posing it about the relationship. 😸

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  • Not necessarily she could just be confused about why you treat her a certain way.

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  • She is wondering what type of relationship this is, and wants certainty.

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  • she might just wanna know if you're excluisve or not

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  • Yeah, she does. But I agree, it's a bit early and rushed

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What Guys Said 32

  • I would say the girls here would have the best opinion on this and maybe just answer with another question like how far you wana go with it or something like that, but it also comes down on how you feel about her and if you wana take it to the next step.

    Formulate your answer from how you feel and on whether you wana take it further or not.

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  • Most time she wants to hear what 'she' thinks!😂😂😂

    If you say something wrong, you will regret it!😝😝
    Its likely that she wants relationship, else she wants a clear no as answer so that she could do some other work (which she might have been planning 🙂)

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  • She's anxious and she wants security, and the fact that she is asking you means she is interested in taking it further. If you don't answer yes, she will be okay with it for awhile, but her emotions are going to slip and she's gonna wanna break up.

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  • Yep. She wants you to herself.

    Just tell her "You are mine."

    And when she says "Are you mine?"

    You say "Absofuckinglutely"

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  • Yes, she’s done bring your walking fleshlight. Good for her.

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  • This is a typical question from women. They are all same in the world. İn every country girls use the same arguments. Like feminists use have the same argument in every country and hate men.

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  • She wants to know if this is going anywhere or if she is wasting her time. This is not something a friend asks a friend.

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  • In my experience, they’ve only asked me if they are wanting to, if she didn’t want one, she’d either just let things happen or make sure you knew she didn’t

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  • Could be she wants to define the relationship and know whether to continue or not. I hate it when a girl asks such question without providing any info as to what she's thinking.

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  • I agree, its not very long. I think me and my girlfriend took longer actually. But we were kindof an item for almost a year we were both so damn shu about it tho. Lol

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  • No that means she's trying to define what it is that you have. Women like to know what kind of relationship is it

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  • Well she wants define the reletionship. You should just ask yourself if you want that, ask her what she wants and if she wants what you want.

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  • She wants you to stop being a pussy and settle things

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  • It means she wants to have a long boring talk about your relationship. She also wants to you to stop finishing inside her.

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  • it means literally close to nothing these days, after a month and a half of dating the girl asked me "what are we?" and i answered " we like each other, find each other attractive and like to spend time together, and i think there's a chance for something more " she seemed content with that answer... a month later she asked me again and i told her " i like you and i think we can have something serious and meaningful " she seemed to like my answer but from there it was all downhill.. a month after that she started acting really weird i asked her " what do you consider me? what am i to you " and she sent me a long asz paragraph about how she likes me, and likes spending time with me... etc but doesn't see a future with me.

    point is , she was pushing for something serious, when i finally decided i want her for real she ran away.

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    • That's cause you were beating around the bush instead of giving a straight forward answer: we are boyfriend/girlfriend or i want you to be my girlfriend.

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    • In that case i would dropped her the moment you knew or found it instead of waiting for her to confess sense she wasn't going to. Hopefully you'll find a much better woman.

    • @BrittBratt2416 well... at some point she started acting like she truly wanted me and there was no one else in her life, but turns out she even has no idea what she wants, she blocked and unblocked me on facebook/instagram and didn't even give me a straight answer when i cornered her , she would go out to a resturant or to the beach with her "friends' and when i asked who are these friends she said no one just friends, and i know for a fact that she has barely 2 friends and she doesn't even like them that much, she lied to me a lot and finally it just ended.

  • It means she has no idea what's going on. And... she's clingy AF

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  • Yeah. She wants a title. Go ahead and call her your girlfriend

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    • As soon as you stop dating anyone else and are exclusive to one girl then she is your girlfriend by default.

  • She wants to know where she stands with you and what intentions you might have in the future

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  • If ur under 20 dont get serious just hit it and quit it no matter what she says trust me

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  • Lmao ig yes, but would have meant exactly opposite if u were already in a relationship 😂😂

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  • Either that or she's having an existential crisis.

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  • We are human people *whrrrr* *kachunk*

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  • she wouldn't ask if she wasn't interested in more.

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  • She's just trying to flirt u..

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  • She wants you

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  • Friends

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  • Yes.
    Good luck.

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  • Dating a friend for 7 days? Sure.

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  • How is it not the friendzone if nothing has been defined

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    • People who are friendzoned dont hook up and go on dates right

    • If someone has to ask what they are that seems like the friend zone to me cause obviously it’s not indicated that one person or the other isn’t reciprocating feelings

  • Yes, good going.

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