What’s the main reason you haven’t been dating lately?

[Anonymous]

What’s the main reason you haven’t been dating lately?

[Kaazsz]

Split with wife. Have been working on my life.

Have been working hard on overcoming my horrible childhood.
Making breakthroughs in my mind and spirit constantly.

Becoming more and more in tune with other people and learning how to socialize and flirt and love others.

I don’t feel ready to date anyone. I know towards the end of my self discovery journey I am going to be a seriously good catch. I want to date around and fuck around and find someone to love eventually.

For now, I flirt, I talk, I engage with girls. I’m not in a spot right now to really date. I’m working full time and going to school more than full time starting May. I won’t have time for anything! But my career will start and I will be back on my feet again after divorce. I can’t wait to start my new life and have a life that’s fun instead of full of pain and anguish.

[CandyCougar]

I wish you nothing but love, light and happiness! Life is definitely all about the journey, not the destination and you seem to finally found the ground and are running with it. Great to hear!

[Anonymous]

I live in area where no decently educated woman lives, usually school dropout mummies.

In uni now so time is not at greatest availability. I study degree where is only one girl in class and she is not looking after her self and probably lesbian.

Hate going to noisy pubs/bars, as usually there drunk people who do not remember much in morning and sticky carpet not really my think.

When I see someone worthy to talk to she is already married or have boyfriend...

Everybody is on apps, but rarely anybody said any good about it.

Could be that I'm to good at finding excuses too.

[Anonymous]

Bc I split up from a guy that was really bad and it was so confusing and emotionally distressing that I needed time. And then realised that I went into the relationship for the wrong reasons. Even though I would like a relationship now it wouldn’t be for the right reasons

[Asker]

Me too. I met this guy at work that had a girlfriend. He was attracted to me. They broke up. I saw him on a dating app recently but he’s never on. Figured he’s not looking and I’m not too so I guess timing has to be right. But i understand completely

[rachxxx]

I find it really difficult to be faithful to one person. So I just don't get into serious relationships because I don't want to hurt anyone.

[Asker]

Does it make sense for someone who was just in a relationship to be in a dating app, update it, and not be in. Do you think there not looking if they were just in a relationship?

[rachxxx]

It's possible they are on a dating app to find casual fun. Doesn't mean they're looking for a serious relationship, especially if they just got out of one

[Asker]

So you would wait a bit and focus on you

[rachxxx]

I guess

[Asker]

I mean instead of being a rebound

[rachxxx]

It depends though... Sometimes rebounds work out to be the best relationships. But you've gotta be pretty good at reading people. If he's still super hung up on the past, it won't go anywhere

[sidhk69]

So in friends with benefits thing?

[Asker]

I’m saying I don’t want to be used for sex. I’d rather have someone else take the bait. by the way he hasn’t been active on the app in months so he probably isn’t looking and taking a break.

[rachxxx]

Yeah exactly. Some of the best sex I've had has been rebound sex. But if you want something more then I'd give it a miss

[Asker]

I think it’s best to wait it out

[Organic_Pineapples]

slag

[Allie_Oops]

Men just in general do not express interest in me. They never have. I've always had a hard time getting a date.

[jennifer_bloom]

Mainly Money and Time - I don't go out enough to movies or restaurants or bowling alleys to meet guys.

[Desconhecida]

I've been dating however not to commit... maybe I've become too cynical

[Armourdillo]

Yea typically women want men to commit while they feel they shouldn't.

[Armourdillo]

Typically the guy who would commit to you are too short, not the right race etc.

[Armourdillo]

Just admit you want the Chads to commit and save men the time

[Desconhecida]

Who are you? God! Have some respect for other people's opinions..😕🙄

[Armourdillo]

I do, have you never had an opinion challenged?

[Desconhecida]

Not by kids. And especially not if the comeback is some naive perspective of someone who doesn't know real love yet.
Let's talk again when you're in your 30s... have a good day, kiddo!
🤣😊💋

[Armourdillo]

You're patronizing fucking cunt.

[Armourdillo]

You type with emojiis and can't take criticism, who's the real kid? You literally get attention just for having a vagina so there's no necessity for you to work out your bullshit.

[Armourdillo]

"let's talk again when you're 30" I'm 24 explain what EXACTLY will change.

[Armourdillo]

You're dimissing my opinion based on age not logistics.

[Armourdillo]

How is you calling me a child not as naive, I'll pm you a picture of my licence to prove I'm not a child if you're actually being serious

[Desconhecida]

@Armourdillo
Someday maybe you learn that character is not measured by the way you type.. but by the way you treat people.

PS.:
"have you never had an opinion challenged?" - without disrespecting someone in your safe place behind a screen?

(I use emojis, yes. Who's the patronizing person now?) •• Grow up! - understatement of the year for you, brat! 🤣

[Armourdillo]

Look at how you treated me

[Armourdillo]

What makes you better

[OlderAndWiser]

Because I am living with my girlfriend.

[cth96190]

Once too often I was rejected, left heartbroken, cheated on and used.
A man can be hurt only so many times before he reaches evidence-based conclusions about female nature and takes a decision to walk away.
Add to that current laws that criminalise the act of approaching a female and that today’s consensual sex can become tomorrow’s false rape allegation.
I have had to defend two false workplace sexual harassment allegations, which were made by spiteful women because I declined their sexual advances.
The Duluth model into which police, magistrates and judges are ‘educated’ does away with a man’s fundamental civil rights, which includes the presumption of innocence and Duluth reverses the burden of proof.
Under the Duluth model, it is possible for a woman to destroy a man’s life by mere allegation.
Family Law and the courts are weighted so heavily against men that a man would have to be drooling at the mouth retarded to cohabit with, or marry a female.
Here in Australia, Feminists are lobbying to have the law changed so that a woman can make a divorce-style claim on a man’s property if they have been dating, but not cohabitating.
Child support is so grotesquely unjust that men are ordered to pay for children who are not theirs. In some jurisdictions, it is a crime for a man to seek a DNA test to determine whether or not a child is his.
Really and truly, what sort of idiot man would throw himself into the woodchipper of seeking female company?

[Unit1]

Me and them literally don't speak the same language. I speak German and English fluently and where I'm stranded at nearly nobody speaks either. Population count in my area of residence is 1 million.

Also there is a significant cultural difference.
I'm oriented on the European/German culture. I think like a German, walk like a German, work like a German, understand and explain like a German, speak like a German, laugh like a German, eat like a German and live like a German.

The eastern culture is just vastly different. I don't feel comfortable assimilating into what's not suitable for me.

Sometimes people ask me why i do what i do. Some of them still don't understand me even after explaining. But that's okay because i know what I'm doing.

They laugh at their jokes and i can't see anything funny in their jokes.

No prejudices from me whatsoever. I just don't fit in in the east.

And this is how to be "involuntarily single" for the dominating majority of the time... Even Less chances of success if you're male due to the dating market being the way it generally is (all this hunters and gatherers BS).

Does that make any sense?

[Anonymous]

Lack of confidence stemming from unrelenting ghosting is probably by far the main reason. After my last breakup, nearly a year ago, it has just been a relentless onslaught ghosting rejection after ghosting rejection. Hell, my last breakup was done that way, she just abruptly stopped talking to me (while I was going through a deep depression and she knew that I needed her then more than ever) and then broke up with me over text because "she didn't feel she needed me in her life anymore."

I got back into Tinder, etc almost instantly and 100% of girls I match with either never respond or just abruptly stop talking to me with no apparent reason. I thought the one I've been talking to for the last few weeks was finally going somewhere, and then she ghosted me this weekend as well, also out of the blue and with no explanation. Not to mention I've been rejected by every job I applied for recently, including ones where the interview seemingly went very well. Shockingly, I have basically zero confidence at this point. So I have pretty much given up at this point, if every single girl I show any interest in is just going to ignore or abruptly ghost me out of the blue, why should I even try anymore? I have trouble even messaging girls on tinder, let alone approaching somebody in real life.

Cue the "You're just too desperate dude, you need to just be confident and tone down the thirst" and "your 20s are more fun when you're single" comments because that's the high-quality advice that I get from literally everyone who has so far as listened.

[Felinegirl]

I'm in a relationship.

But when I was single and not dating: I was struggling with myself. I wasn't in a good place to bond with others because I didn't like myself enough. I knew I had been better in the past and would be better again, but in the meantime I needed to work on myself.

When I'm in a good place, I get attention and dating is easy for me, I am considered 'attractive'. When I am in a bad place though, people ignore me and when I try they reject me. Moral of the story: the way you feel about yourself and the vibe you give off matter A LOT in how attractive others see you. To all the people thinking they are too ugly to ever date: you probably are right now, but it's not your physical looks, it's how you present yourself. Improve from inside to make your outside shine!

[LinKoba]

Decided to be asexual and truly figuring out I have very little emotional and sexual tension towards people. Being attractive myself I give people the wrong intention so it doesn’t help. Do I see people and admire their overall looks, sure but, I do not find them sexually appealing.

[ThisDudeHere]

For one, I'm bogged down with studies. For two, i live with my parents. And for three, I don't have a social circle through which I can meet new people. I mean, I have friends in school and maybe a couple outside of it that I don't meet often, but I have no close ones. No bros or anything. So I have no idea what a loner has to do to meet new people, especially girls who, I assume, likely want someone socially active.

[Anonymous]

No one interested in me.

Interested in no one.

The town in which I live, where the females - and people in general - have many highly undesirable traits.

My saltiness toward humanity as a whole (misanthropy, if you want to call it that); so not even being confident that I'll ever find a girl I'll be emotionally attracted to.

Having the personality of a rock, so being almost (if not completely) unable to get a girl even if I do find one I like. The sound of my voice may be a possible turn-off. Like to think I'm average- to decent-looking, but that's in the eye of the beholder.

[Opinion Owner]

But I've never been on a date nor had a girlfriend, so...

[Anonymous]

Simple. If a girl wants to be with me then she has to make the effort and let me know she's interested. I'm perfectly fine being single and have no intention on searching for a partner. So, the only way I'll end up with someone is if she makes the effort.

[Napoli]

This is a fair enough comment, but there has to be some middle ground

[Opinion Owner]

@Napoli I'm sure there is.

[Rangers]

I work 5:00pm-12:30 5/6 days per week, and I literally never get Friday or Saturday off. I moved last August and people have generally made it very clear that I'm more than unwelcome here and they're even more judgmental than they are back at my real home. At this point, I'm unsure if I even want to make connections because long term, I think I should go to live someplace better.

[zagor]

No one has expressed interest in me lately, and I haven't met anyone that I've really been interested in for a while. Just started a new job and there are maybe three women (and 30 men) who work there. So things aren't looking up right now. I also don't drink much anymore, so going out to bars and such doesn't have much appeal.

[MusicMayhem]

You know that you don't have to drink alcohol at bars right? And that you women can be found in many places outside of work?

[zagor]

@MusicMayhem Still trying to find out where. Went to a Meetup this very night - 8 girls, 27 guys. Yes I counted.

[MusicMayhem]

And whilst you were busy counting, you could have actually been approaching them before someone else does.

Well meetups are a good starter, but you can also try cafes, in the street, the supermarket, a park (If there's other people around), sport events, exhibitions, shows, shopping malls...

Point is women are everywhere dude, you just need to be open to meeting them and not give yourself excuses why you can't approach them.

[Anonymous]

trust issues, social media has made everyone so paranoid. the risk of being cheated on is highly now more than ever before. basically its just the fear of getting hurt. so most people with settle for situationships instead as a form of self protection

[Anonymous]

A combination:
--I'm pretty, but not outstanding and works and study in an atmosphere full of women. With very little chance of interacting with men.
--I think even when I wish I could date someone, most men these days don't follow or court women, so maybe I'll end up single.

[jtmc731]

Hmm.. I seem to have some sort of six month curse. Outside of that, just had to get life together, and needed a break to work on myself. had some big life changes and a relationship wouldn’t have made it through, or started.

[Anonymous]

I am to good for you women and no I'm not joking
you women have fallen for a lie

no point in dating stupid people
there are very very very few women
who are at my level

and trust me
I'm not talking about
LMS

when I say level I mean truth

[HomoFuge]

I got tired of guys always leaving me for beautiful girls. I think as an ugly person I feel a lot better when I build up walls and remain emotionally detached.

[Anonymous]

Women aren't honest in what they are looking for. I'm very up front about looking for something casual, they say the same, we have sex once and they suddenly act like we are married. Then they get pissed at me when I was the one who told the truth up front.