Is it okay to chase two guys at the same time?

[Anonymous]

[Sunburst223]

What exactly do you mean by "chasing two guys?" Do you mean pursuing a long-term relationship with both or simply testing the waters? In the case of a long-term relationship with both, that would depend on what all 3 of you want. Are they okay with sharing you? In that case, go for it. If not, leading them both on is cruel. If you simply want to go on a date or two with both guys to see which one you prefer, I also think that's okay. If you're not exclusively seeing someone, keeping your options open is never a bad idea.

[LMNOP123]

Yeah, just not both on the same level. You have one main target and the rest are secondary crushes. The secondary ones have to be on a much lower and unchanging level of progress.
If you don’t get your main target pick a new one and continue from where you left off.

[Sensmind]

Yes and no - Yes it is okay to have feelings for more than one but make a decision and stick to it early, see it out - Don't go back and forth, by doing so someone could get hurt not least yourself.
Sometimes I look at a situation and think what could go right, not much and what could go wrong, a whole lot.

[Sensmind]

Thanks for MH

[lightbulb27]

of course, it's the catching that's where the trouble starts. But if you learn to use a lasso like the cowgirls back in the olden says, should be ok...

[Cynicaldreamer]

No. You can, but that's a poor way to get to know which one you prefer more...

Call me old fashioned, but I like getting to know one person at a time, see if we click? I like him- we date exclusively.

If not, go to guy two...

I just don't understand how some people can chase after more than one person at a time and decide which one they care for more...

[ManOnFire]

I'm not surprised that quite a few women said it's okay, and I guess because they often do want to be down and dirty. Women like it if multiple guys are into them but actually need to control their passions and not play with all of them. Women, I think, are really the ones who are more addicted to having "options" than men are.

[Amanda269]

At what point do you consider a person to be exclusive yours? It is the reason why most women wants to define the relationship early on, because the moment we become exclusive all other men are locked out. It is the definition of being single vs being in a relationship.

[ManOnFire]

@Amanda269 No, the way you see it is that you can juggle or enjoy being entertained by as many men as you want while still calling it singleness, even though if a guy were to do that with many women you would not respect it the way you want to be respected for doing it.

[SydneySentinel]

I wouldn't do it because I don't like to get to know more than one person romantically at a time.
As long as the guys are both aware that things are just casual or that you haven't put a label on it, it should be fine.

[Anonymous]

What do you mean exactly by "chasing" two guys at the same time. Are you having physical/intimate moments with both or are you going out and getting to know the guys to see if you're interested but haven't gotten to the point where you guys are technically dating. There's a difference between going on a date or two and dating someone. Once you're dating you're exclusive unless it's agreed upon by all parties that you're not, but the assumption is first that you are exclusive. Maybe I go on two or three dates with a girl, but we just don't click. I never go back to her place or vice versa and maybe at most we do is hug. Simultaneously I am going on two or three dates with another girl and we do click. So, we decide to continue seeing each other while the other I cut things off with. So, it's fine if you let multiple guys know you're into them and want to get to know them but once you've gotten to the point where you are routinely going on dates and are starting to get physical and intimate... it should just be one guy. If you're sleeping with both guys and they don't know about the other then you're not only betraying their trust that you are the only person they are with but you're exposing them to the possibility of contracting an STD from someone that believes they're clean but the other guy they're sleeping with isn't. If I knew a girl I was sleeping with was sleeping with another man I'd be pissed.

[Adam1978]

Nothing wrong in showing interest in more than one guy, but pick your favorite and chase only him, and if that doesn't work you can switch target. Just remember this is really only okay early in a dating process. Ie first few dates after that you should have made your choice and cut the others lose, unless you happen to date someone in a open relationship.

[JHBgirl]

I'd really not do that, because you'll be intentionally hurting the guy that you won't end up with. And if you want to starting dating either one, it's best to not handle men (or people in general) like they're some kind of buffet. People have feelings and you should treat those in a way you want to be treated.

Also how you treat the guy you might end up with in the beginning of a relationship, really sets the foundation of the relationship so keep that in mind.

[Anonymous]

I've got a friend who is being strun along by a woman that also is stringing along at least 2 others. So she's playing 3 guys, and the bad part is they all know about each other. She keeps saying she wants all of them and can't make up her mind. Let me ask you, do you feel like this situation is ok? Is it ok because they know about the other. I don't think so. Guys get praised for having multiple g/f's but it's not ok ether. Toying with the emotions of another person is never ok.

[sejla]

They should all walk and find a woman who likes only them not anyone else.

Leave her in the dust looking dazed and confused.

[Opinion Owner]

Been trying to get that through his thick skull but he can't give her up. She still calls him when other guy is at work. He just won't let go.

[mcclane101]

Actually, at first, I think so. It's okay to date two guys to see which one you work better with, but at some point you have to make a choice. I've been one of two guys dating a girl, because she was worth it, and in the end I was secure enough to not give her crap about it, so she did pick me.

[Elliegirl]

As long as you’re honest with both of them and are trying to decide who you want to date exclusively, I don’t see a problem with it. Just be open about what you’re doing so you don’t come off as trying to be deceptive.

[DeeDeeDeVour]

As long as you aren't already in a committed relationship, you may "chase" both.
You can't have/keep a committed/exclusive relationship with both though.
Just choose one or tell both of them the truth & get them both agree.

[BrittBratt2416]

Hell no, chasing any is bad enough. You can drop hints or let them know your interested but I wouldn't chase him. A lot of guys can get turned off by it and see it as desperate cause they want to do the picking/chasing.

[PinkMichae]

If they both know your not exclusive then you can date how ever many people you desire. I'd advise against it because it's hard enough giving your time to one person. At least the time they deserve from you.

[hahahmm]

Yes. What’s not okay is to be in a serious relationship with a guy & cheat/flirt with others at the same time.

[gbalkam]

Sure.. if you are a slut. Maybe you always wanted to be known as a cock tease.. Mainly though, would it be ok for 1 guy you were interested in to chase and date you and also date your best friend or sister? Could you sleep with him and not wonder if your boyfriend or sister were also sampling the goods?

[AdventrousGent]

Slut shaming , come on man that's kind of an obvious target.

[Amanda269]

Does chasing mean having sex to you? It is common to talk with multiple people on dating sites and try to go on date or two to evaluate them. When you click with two people, you drop the worse connection and date/become exclusive with the better guy. The dating face (time between total stranger and becoming exclusive) is a mess.

[Alistar88]

Yes its perfectly acceptable. It's only dating unless you two make it official so you are to see as many people as you want till you decide what you want

[BreadNbutter]

If it’s just dating sure but if you actually want something real eventually with one of them it’s better to focus on one person at a time. No one likes competing for love.

[SmokyEnrique]

It's rude

[BreadNbutter]

@SmokyEnrique how?

[SmokyEnrique]

For Casual sex it's ok but love must be for one. We can't love someone because of his assets but nowadays people only look money and physique

[Jersey2]

You can. I wouldn’t have played when I was single though... I would have moved on as I don’t have time for that unless you put out on the regular. Anyway, more of a friends with benefits type of arrangement.

[Amanda269]

Until you are boy/girlfriend, you are not bonded and are free to date. Please make the guys aware.

[HOAAH]

This reminds me of the movie, because i said so, with Mandy Moore. The only problem is, feelings can get hurt.

[Cantpickausername012]

I think its okay unless you're not leading them on, its okay to talk to two guys and know what you want