How would you react if your date was always busy with their phone during the date?

[Chikky]

[coachTanthony]

Addiction begins with the hope that something "out there" can instantly fill up the emptiness inside. For some it's their smart device!

I personally would say something like " is their something important you need to take care of"? Then they will either get the hint or not.

If not then, No 2nd date for you!

[coachTanthony]

Thank you 🙏

[OlderAndWiser]

I would quietly get up, pay the check, and leave her sitting there at the table. If she wants to disrespect me that much, she deserves no respect in return.

[coachTanthony]

You are a savage!

[Unit1]

Ha! Perfect! I was about to post the same!

[daringhorse]

Smart move!

[OlderAndWiser]

@coachTanthony Above all else, never compromise your self-respect in a relationship.

[coachTanthony]

Well said my friend!

[Ihavenoclue_]

@coachTanthony I think I would let her pay while I walk out 😂

[coachTanthony]

@Ihavenoclue_ I know I know you guys are savage AF.

[Screenwriter]

At MOST I'd pay my half. At worst, I'd leave and pay nothing. There's no excuse for ignoring someone for a phone. iIf you can't turn off your phone for an hour or so, you're too busy to date or real people bore you. Either way, stay home with your device.

[OlderAndWiser]

@Screenwriter

[OlderAndWiser]

@Screenwriter Don't pay the check and you run the risk of the restaurant calling the police and reporting you for not paying the check ("defrauding an innkeeper.") They have my name because I've made a reservation.

[Screenwriter]

I'm not talking about that kind of situation. I mean you've been there awhile pre order and have gotten something to drink or an appetizer. It's casual. No reservation. The person left with their phone might suffer a 15 or 20 dollar hit. You'd never do this where you'd get in trouble.

[SydneySentinel]

Unless it's an emergency, it's unnecessary. I'd probably not go out with him again.

[Warmapplecrumble]

Leave... They might not even notice.

[Warmapplecrumble]

Thanks for mho :-)

[Cynicaldreamer]

Unless he told me prior to the date he was expecting a phone call or had an emergency, I would consider that VERY rude and a sign of disinterest.

When I'm out with someone, I give them my full attention and expect the same.
If he wait can't a few hours to call or text someone back, that says to me he doesn't value spending time with me.

... put it this way, there wouldn't be a second date.

[koalakola]

That would be my perfect opportunity to ghost someone physically.

I would sneak out and once I am at safe distance, I would text/call them "Sorry, I couldn't make it."
Let them go crazy. 'But you were there, we ordered'.

Deny everything. Say you were never there and they probably are hallucinating it, turn off call because you are just busy at moment.

You will be blessing their next date as next date will get good attention. Scare has way of doing things than someone calling out (plus you don't know them enough to call 'em out).

Bonus: I have done something like this and it worked but since she was friend, she figured it out.

[Lily_Pi]

If this is a first date than it's a completely deal breaker 100%. The whole point is to be getting to know each. Nothing is more off putting then going on a date with someone who seems so uninterested in you that they can't stop staring at their phone or give you their undivided attention. If they are messing with their phone the whole time then they clearly just aren't that interested. If I'm really interested in someone and want to get to know there there's no way I'm going to be staring at my phone the whole time!

I will say once you've been with someone for a while it can be different but its honestly still really agitating. I feel like you two are disconnected if your on your phones all the time.

[Screenwriter]

If they're ALWAYS busy with their phone during dates, dates aren't important. Therefore the dating situation isn't important and you aren't either. Time to walk away. I wouldn't even say anything. I'd excuse myself and leave. This is the only case where I'd say stick them with the bill. They are both rude and thoughtless. You not paying anything mirrors what they're doing to you. My feeling is they wouldn't even understand. If they do deign to contact you, explain your ire at their "dating" their phone and not you, and block them.

[Anonymous]

If it was an emergency or important work calls or something like that, that would be one thing. If they were texting other people or doing things that weren't necessary and just ignoring me, I'd be pissed. So disrespectful.

I have friends who are constantly on their phones while we're hanging out, and that's bad enough.

[Anonymous]

Even with friends, we have a rule that you get 1 minute to check your messages or do whatever on your phone before we "start" hanging out and then it's no phones. So the idea of a date doing this, where you are supposed to be getting to know each other and seeing if there is an attraction is incredibly rude. It shows that you are the last thing that is important to them. Sure, they could be super busy with work, or have some profession that requires them to be on the phone for emergency purposes, but then maybe those people need to reevaluate if they even have time to commit to anyone if they can't even find the time to dedicate themselves to one simple date.

[yucychan]

Yes, I had the unfortunate luck of encountering such a guy.
Throughout the date, he was on his phone. Which later he admitted that he was texting his brother.
They were supposed to be playing tennis right now, a weekly event or something. Mentioned that it was a bad timing to have a date at this hour.
What the fish, then he shouldn't have agreed to meeting up or just suggested another time.

[Dongtai]

“Hey I appreciate you coming out but I’m not enjoying myself. I want to end this date and head out.”

She’ll either ask why or say ok. If she apologizes and puts her phone away for the rest of the date, I stay. If she doesn’t care, I leave and date someone else.

[paronomasia]

Id directly make a comment about it, ie. «Work message? » or something like that, so they have a chance to explain why they could not be torn away from their phone for the duration of the date. If it were to persist, however, I would probably not give it another date

[Aethereal]

Most likely, I'd make that date the last date with her. There is a time and place for everything, and playing on your phone during a date is disrespectful. If there was a good reason for it, then cancel/reschedule the date. This behaviour tells me that my date either has no interest in me, or my interest in her is greatly misplaced.

[englisc]

I've had this happen before. We met online so I jokingly asked if the date was that bad that she was back on POF already, and that she should at least wait until the end of the date. She made an excuse that it was just her friends checking up on her, then I said "ok, well now they know I'm not an axe-murderer you should put it away until the end of the date". She apologised, put it away and that was that.

[LesterJester]

If she just quickly checked a notification but then left it alone, I don't have an issue. Could be an emergency or something, I can live with that and let it slide.

But if she was getting non-important notifications every couple of minutes and didn't bother to put them on silent or she decided to sit there and type out a bunch of responses, I'd just walk out without saying a word.

She can pay the fk'n bill for wasting my time.

[holograph]

To be honest, if there isn't an emergency, I don't even want to see your phone AT ALL during a date, literally not even for 5 seconds.

It would only become "a real issue" if you spent significant time on it, though. But if you spent significant time on your phone during a date, then I think you would have already judged me poorly anyway, so you probably won't mind if I'm turned off by it.

[tslater]

I think I might first give her the benefit of the doubt that maybe something is going on and ask about it. If that's revealed to not be the case then I might say something along the lines of, "I don't mean any offense, but I'm starting to wonder what this is supposed to be, a date or am I your body guard or what's going on here?"

[HeavyRoller]

I would politely excuse myself. Pay the check and leave. I don't have time for people who are self-absorbed like that.

On another note, I often interview people for jobs. One lady came in and in the middle of the interview she got a text message. She actually picked up the phone and replied while we were talking. I thanked her for coming. :) Never do that, ahahaha.

[lifelearner011]

I'd give it the benefit of the doubt initially, just to see if the person says something about it acknowledging is not respectful.
Secondly, if this doesn't happens, I would graciously begin to silent myself till the "attention" and '"respect" towards the conversation is again joined.
Finally, I'd add it to account since is a big deal breaker for me and it would tell miles on what potentially would be our interactions if we follow trough. So.. probably bye bye.

[datgirl]

I would just leave without paying and never speak to them again. I went out on a date with a guy like that who took a phone call during dinner, yes it was for work, but it was still weird for me. I dont like the uber busy dudes that heavily rely on their technology.

[Lman3000]

Simple, If I know there is no chemistry or any spark in the date and I can't get the girl off the phone, I finish the date up as fast as possible, say how I feel and tell them I don't think this will work and I leave and move onto the next one, I find people who do that shit with their phones the fucking worst no one likes being ignored period I don't care who the hell ya are anyone can hate that shit

[SuperManiac]

Get hammered and engage "solo" mode. If we can't entertain each other with our company for whatever reason, I'm at least going to have a fun time on my own! :-D She can continue tagging along if she likes, or not.

[cloud9vortex1234]

I would be thinking why are you even here? I would assume it was for the free meal even though I don't really know for sure. I would be thinking "Don't they know this is rude, or do they simply not care". Then I would excuse myself to the restroom, but instead head for the car and leave.