Why do men date gold diggers and avoid women who have their life in order?

[Anonymous]

[zeitgeist057]

Gold diggers tend to be more attractive not because they have focused on having their lives in order, but because they have focused on making themselves attractive to men.

I'm no expert on gold diggers, because women who try to get their hands on my wallet are not attractive to me, in fact it turns me off. But from my community (which has a lot of money in it), I observe that many women who have few resources are able to attract men who do with physical beauty and being amenable to his command. They appear to take good care of themselves, focusing on fitness and self-development, but also spending the necessary time attending to their sugar daddy. Many of them tend to be 15 or more years younger than their partners.

Again, I'm not an expert and could be dead wrong, but this is what it seems like to me.

"Women who have their life in order" sounds like a good thing, but if she's a workaholic, out of shape, or just has an unfortunate face, it might not be enough to attract most men.

[Not_Average]

These memes are toxic. Money is impressive because it showcases ambition, the ability to provide, and security. Men and women are different, and therefore value each other differently. Men don’t really give a single fuck about how much money a woman makes. We want a woman who’s loyal, submissive, and complements our life in a way that makes us both happy. A woman who’s passionate, selfless, shares our interest, and can relate to you through the turbulent life circumstances that get thrown your way. Women value men based on their leadership. They want a strong man who can provide security and be that rock that they can lean on. They want a man who will make a great father and be able to
hold together a family unit.

These feminist values you preach make women and men miserable. Look at the divorce and depression rate. It’s clearly not working lol. These people in relationships like this typically feel unfulfilled and build resentment. I’ve never met a strong married couple who actually thinks this way. Usually it’s some submissive beta male and a woman who resents him because it, but typically convince themselves that his inability to the lead the relationship is actually strength.

I’m honestly so glad I don’t have to deal with these feminist types anymore lol

[Xoxocutekitty]

Simple, gold diggers are pretty paid customer service bots whereas women who have their life together often have strong opinions and are ready to walk out based on their convictions.

Respect both, it's just as hard to fake being easygoing as it is to be lonely on a Friday night because the prince charmings in your area low key suck.

Men that date gold diggers often feel a sense of control, that their money is going towards an enjoyable experience, one not interrupted with someone trying to be right, or constantly trying to 'impress' a stranger.

[crazyish]

How are gold diggers able to achieve a man's attention in the first place? Their youth and their looks. Maybe their skills in the bedroom? They know they are preferred by men. They believe they can manipulate men this way. Which they do end up doing to some men. The ones who are superficial and easily drawn in by looks. Not all men are like this though. Plus I would like to point out that women who have their shit together and can take care of themselves should already be a regular standard for all women. It shouldn't be looked at as a bonus.

[jennifer_bloom]

Woman who earn their own money expect to be served while woman who do not earn their own money are interested in serving the guy they are dating

[hinda_123]

U are right

[MCheetah]

Notice how the caption said "a man with money is a bonus," rather than it's irrelevant, unintentionally ruining her own own point and implying all women are some level of gold diggers. I find that hilarious and a woman accidentally telling the truth.

And only if the man knows she's a good digger is it really really bad. But the irony is, the best men are the ones smart enough not to waste money trying to buy their way into a stranger's. pants or heart, and as the caption implies, women won't want those "sexist" men, anyway.

[Qdbrown]

Let me get this straight, women can get what they want without much effort, and have a group of men willing to pay is a bad thing? Yes, it's sad, but encouraged.

Just look up Breffault's Law and Hypergamy. Women like most other female animals seek out the best partner that protect and provide. The provide is an expectation of humans. Must get a corporate license from the state and loan up all the property (the best) and vehicles to get by. Credit cards will be necessary too. So the man is enslaved, and doesn't fight the system, cause problems, get out of control, or just leave.

The say there is two kinds of prostitution. The type where you pay her to leave, and the type you pay monthly installments. Is it any wonder that some girls specialize to ensure no money is left on the table.

[nelly83]

There is a difference between a lazy person without values who just leeches onto other people’s hard work to serve themselves Vs someone with honest values of hard work and responsibility in life.

Do you really want your kids to grow up copying their mother with the mentality of being lazy entitled and without any sort of values in life?

[Qdbrown]

@nelly83 Nope. Keep those crazy women out of your life and lineage

[Ifriqyan]

According to my brother and my soon to be Fiance men and women care about different things.
They don't want a dumb woman but ultimately they don't particularly care for "boss ladies". They want someone who has good motherly instincts and a good homemaker and someone who respects and is willing to take care of them and their children.

I think that us women were deluded into thinking that men mostly look for a boss ass lady who makes big cash and is up the corporate ladder or smth.

Of course I'm basing my answer on what the men around me tell me.
I do acknowledge that this isn't a general truth since not all men are the same and these things can highly differ depending on the society and culture.

[bamesjond0069]

This. Exactly this. Men with their shit together ie have a job and options with women definitely have this mindset. The men who dont are the ones who dont have a good job situation and fewer options dating look to the woman to be a paycheck. So thats who usually is disagreeing. Ie " i make 20k a year i want a boss bitch who makes bank" vs "i make 6 figures so im primarily looking for a nice home life and great mother for kids"

[Anonymous]

Because gold diggers chase the men, make them feel needed and liked, and aren't always obvious about their intentions. They aren't usually as afraid to show their interest in a guy, since if it fails, they can just go to the next one. Most guys avoid golddiggers, but when the only women who actively let's her interest be known is the golddigger, while the more accomplished ones spend little to no time chasing, doesn't it make sense that the goldigger is the one they'd pick?

Women do the same thing. If they like a guy, and even if they know the guy likes them, but never makes a move, they will go for the easier guy who does make a move. Humans in general take the path of least resistance.

[SirJohn42]

would never date a gold digger. Not worthy time or intelligence.
They are the most shallow people.
They dont make good dates let alone good relationships. Dont like high maintence women or to plastic. Most do not have empathy or they are to selfish.
Plus you stop giving them a free ride or you find hardships they walk away.

I prefer women who can take care of themselves. Know how to work for a living. Its ok if they deoend on you for things but aren't demanding. I find these women more kind hearted and have empathy more.

[RationalMale]

You might indeed have your life in order. It doesn't mean someone's going to find you attractive or likable though, and no one owes you dates, sex, or a relationship.

Instead of worrying about gold diggers, why not spend some time self reflecting on why your dating life might not be going how you want?

1. Are you likeable and have good social skills? If not, you can practice and improve.
2. Are you healthy, fit, and attractive? If not, you can eat right, work out, and dress well.
3. Are you happy with life and yourself or are you hoping someone will fulfill you? You can get hobbies, find goals in life, enjoy family time, and be a happy person.

[BlueEyedBaby88]

Depends. I'm a successful woman and I have attracted rather successful men. One whose business pulled in 3 million last year. Another who owns multiple rental properties. And a third whose private company does specialty work.

Am I a gold digger? No. I have no interest in their money or success. But being extremely intelligent, confident and decent-looking I attract these men because I am more valuable than a dimwitted piece of eye candy (a gold digger). I frequent a bistro for coffee where a lot of local businessmen go (I know the owner) and have even had guys blatantly ignore their airheaded companion (aka eye candy) standing beside them to ask the owner who I am.

[BlueEyedBaby88]

*And dress decently.

I find the bistro situation interesting. At least twice guys ignored their female companions to find out who I was while a third told her to move aside (so I could order) & placed himself between us so I'd thank him & he could start up a chat. One of these three was very successful speaking of cruises like most would talk about a vacation to Yellowstone. Again I don't care for such (I am more impressed by someone's personality) but I am making a blatant point given the gold-digger comment.

[Unit1]

Mighty respect. Businesswomen / career women are my best preference. Who knows, we might meet eventually in one of those places in maybe 5 years or so. I am a soon to be successful man.

[BlueEyedBaby88]

@Unit1 Thank you & good luck to yourself. I find questions like this... jealousy really. Business / successful men are like many they want a decent partner. Gold diggers are pretty but as with a family friend he'd rather be single again than remarry his wife (her greatest achievement prior was a waitress).

[Unit1]

Cheers! I look forward meeting some of these nice businesswomen and career women 😍
Weird men can go date gold diggers.

[Heiniken]

Because gold diggers give them sex. Men want sex from attractive females. Attractive females know this and offer sex in return for a better quality of life (money).

Guys dont give two shits about your job - they only care about how good you are in the bedroom.

[NetSapien]

Perhaps it's based on the perspective.

I've consciously dated gold diggers, though I'd never suggest one is marriage material, but I'm not looking to get married.

I always seen it like 'renting' a relationship which you can always just end whenever. Like an over glorified form/longer term type of escorting.

[craigjones795]

do you find that gold diggers are very submissive when it comes to sex and will have sex even if not in the mood if that is what it takes to keep a rich guy

[NetSapien]

@craigjones795 Not really no. What I have found is that most the ones I've known are just putting up some type of front they think I want to see. They're not looking for the 'rich guy' as much as the allowance. If they will have sex is because that's part of the condition of the $.

[Citizenkirk]

Maybe they have the same type of nesting issues as nurses who fall in love with their most broken patients. You know, if a person is broken Or messed up, then I'll be there too fix them syndrome.
Or, it could be that these guys are either gullable, or looking for someone as shallow and self centered as they are.

[aliali8]

It’s not because women who work are lacking in femininity. All women have to work nowadays , otherwise she would be homeless! It doesn’t mean we are suddenly now all masculine.

It is all due to a mans ego. Men like to feel important so by supporting a woman, he feels like he matters a bit more.

[bamesjond0069]

No they dont. I dont date women with jobs because they are lower quality. A girl who is 18 and babysits for her family and helps at home is top of the desirability list. Usually the kind of girl i seek out to date for serious relationships. So no. Not all girls work.

[aliali8]

@bamesjond0069 so you like to date homeless women? Because in all honesty If a grown woman doesn't work, she would be sleeping on the streets

[bamesjond0069]

Well im not interested in grown women so much. Younger ones a far superior for relationships. Idc what grown women do because they are older and damaged goods. I want the best.

[aliali8]

@bamesjond0069 well then date underage girls (under 18). Because there's a good chance that any girl who is over 18 would need to work in order to survive.

[bamesjond0069]

My girlfriend is 18 and never left the home. So yup thats what i did. Its just older women always pester me or dont understand why i dont find them attractive.

[aliali8]

@bamesjond0069 don’t worry. When your girlfriend turns 25, you will be onto the next 17 yr old girl. You have many prostitutes but never any real love in your life

[aliali8]

@bamesjond0069 most 18 yr old girls have jobs. So the only real dating population for you age kids under the age of 18

[bamesjond0069]

Many dont. Plus its not being a cashier part time at a retail shop im worried about. I dont want a scientist or ceo or woman with a phd. Thats what i definitely stay away from.

[aliali8]

@bamesjond0069 well I think it’s just that you’re insecure when you’re intimidated by smart women. You’re jealous that they have higher status than you. So you only marry stupid women

[bamesjond0069]

Why would i be intimidated. Im really successful myself. I want someone available who would make a good mom. Someone not stressed out.

[aliali8]

@bamesjond0069 just because you're successful, it doesn't mean you can't be insecure. Usually successful men are not intimidated by smart successful women. In fact, confident successful men prefer successful women because they tend to have similar values. Studies have also found that marriages where both spouses with equal levels of education tend to divorce less than couples with different levels of education.

[bamesjond0069]

Just doesn't make sense to me. Higher educated successful women dont seem like they have ànything to offer a relationship besides money, the one thing i dont really need since im not a broke man. So i dont get why i would want to date them?

[aliali8]

@bamesjond0069 Because usually successful men value hard work, ambition and perseverance. You won't become successful if you are lazy, entitled and lacking in ambition. Successful men do not tend to respect lazy , uneducated women. They usually are intelligent and educated so they would get along better with women that are equally as educated and intelligent.

Studies have proven that divorces are less likely to happen when both spouses are similar educational background and intelligence and values.

[aliali8]

@bamesjond0069 there are some lazy trust fund babies that inherit their wealth. THen there are those who actually created their wealth. The ones who created their wealth are far suprieror than the trust fund babies.

[bamesjond0069]

"successful men value hard work, ambition and perseverance" i do. Just not at a job or education. Work hard at being a woman and offering value.

And ofc self made men are more attractive. I worked really hard to get where i am. So i want a woman who works hard too. Just not at money making. Work hard in the kitchen and being a wife and top notch mom.

[aliali8]

@bamesjond0069 But I am just telling you though. Hard working, ambitious men do not respect lazy uneducated women. Intelligent educated people do not get along with dumb people. Hard working people will never ever respect lazy people.

People get along best with those who are similar to them.

If all your friends/ girlfriends are dumb, there is a good chance that you are also dumb.
If all your friends/ girlfriends are assholes, there is a good chance you are also an asshole.
If all your friends / girlfriends are uneducated, there is a good chance you are also uneducated.

[aliali8]

@bamesjond0069 Men, who say that they will never date a woman who is smarter than him, usually have an ego problem. And likely he will be condescending by nature at some point during the relationship or marriage. I know this because my father was the same way and it was a terrible experience growing up with him. Unless you are a total push over who can handle being mistreated, never ever marry a man with an ego problem. It will only cause havoc and tons of problems for the rest of the family.

[aliali8]

@bamesjond0069 Different men see a woman's value differently. Its not 2021, most modern men do not expect women to stay at home. Majority of them are ok with having their wives working, instead of being housewives. Actually most wives have to work to support the family.

[bamesjond0069]

Ok but thats irrelevant to me. Im well off. Idgaf what broke men do. Women who are into careers should seek out broke men since its 2021 and they are cool with a working wife. Admission to me dating a girl seriously is that she is housewife type of girl. Im not the one having the problem. I have an 18 year old girlfriend who made me a sandwich naked. Im happy as can be. Its just a lot of women are highly confused about what men, especially the more desirable men, are looking for in relationships.

[aliali8]

@bamesjond0069 didn't you just say that you will never marry? i have seen quite a few of your posts on here. you just view women as pussy. So no, you're never ever gonna have a housewife. You're just gonna have a long set of baby mamas , living apart from you , as you pay for child support.

[bamesjond0069]

Um... what? Lol. No i said i would never marry a non virgin. No hymen no diamond. Luckily my girlfriend waited special for me so im actually really in a relationship with her not just casual.

[aliali8]

@bamesjond0069 Successful men like intelligent educated women, not dumb bimbos. People tend to marry those who are similar to them.

[aliali8]

@bamesjond0069 I known you for a long time on here. You have no intentions of marrying. You're just looking for a temporary prostitute. Once her pussy hits 25, you're gonna look for the next 17 yr old girl.

[FilmGuy93]

Women who "have their lives in order" (to be honest, I feel like that means something different for everyone, so I'm curious what you mean by that) tend to feel more like colleagues and competitors than lovers. As a man, I don't want my lover to be a colleague.

[RingOfFire]

Have to agree with this. I don't want a business tycoon, I want a mother and wife. If that's not woke, too bad. It's nature.

[aliali8]

@RingOfFire funny thing is that’s your imagined version of reality. Overwhelming majority of households are barely making ends meet with both husband and wife working , living paycheck to paycheck.

[RingOfFire]

My household does just fine with no one working. I don't speak for anyone but myself.

[NetFlo]

It's because you're on social security checks

[RingOfFire]

False. I don't receive a dime from the government.

[t-8900]

just so you know not every man puts a ring on a gold digger either. But he may play with her for a while before moving onto the next one. Men value youth and beauty. Women in the early 20's are the preferred. its just how it is. we all got sold a pack of lies by Walt Disney.

[crazyish]

Yeah we should probably send Walt Disney all our therapy bills😆

[t-8900]

@crazyish yes! Class action lawsuit time! ^^

[RustlessRodney]

Because women “who have their life in order” are typically the kind who don’t need us. Men like to feel needed, to feel useful. If you’re a “strong independent woman who don’t need no man,” then we constantly feel like a burden. With gold diggers, at least we feel like we’re good for something

[jerdanro]

And to be a successful gold digger you have to be really hot.

[RustlessRodney]

You would be really surprised

[genericname85]

Men that go for gold diggers, look got a young bimbo with tits and asses.. they don't have the time or whatever other reason that they don't want a relatable and sustainable partner that is somewhat on eye level with them.

So why waste your time with sugar daddies if that's not what you need/want?

[Aakash_Hangargi]

There is a saying that goes like.

"When a man earns money he thinks, how to spend on the women and take care of her. But when a wonen earns money she thinks she doesn't need a man".

This is not made up by me now ok don't blast on me.
It might be the reason women stop listening when they earn

[Anonymous]

A woman with traditionally feminine qualities is more attractive than a woman without them. If by women who have their life in order you mean a career woman, she's probably lacking femininity even if she looks feminine.

This is the same reason women date bad boys who are more masculine but no good while ignoring nice guys who are more wimpy but would be more stable and loyal.

[NightOfTheSun]

I believe it's pure manipulation on the woman's part, from what I've heard of these types the men may be desperate for love or the woman is so good at covering it up that he brushes off the gold digger behavior, same could go for women when men are being gold diggers

[bamesjond0069]

Because men primarily/only value youth beauty fertility and obedience. Anything else is basically useless at best or bad at worst.

This question is exactly equivalent to why do women like men who are successful and dont want men with extensive pokemon and star wars collections? Hmm answer that one while you're at it. Lmfao. Your question literally sounds that dumb to most of us men.