Do you believe in "leagues" when it comes to dating?

Question

Or that anyone, regardless of their physical beauty, would be attracted to you?

Sarahr123 · Accepted Answer

No it’s just so dumb. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder to a great extent. Your opinion is not fact. Plus conventional beuaty is mostly reserved to beauty related indistries and some people have tastes that deviate from the conventional standards of beauty. I have seen so many men who find women with big facial bones attractive. For instance Angelina Jolie is not conventionally attractive, she has a square shaped jaw which is quite manly, she doesn’t have large almond shaped eyes, she doesn’t have a small chin and she doesn’t have an hourglass figure but so many men are attracted to her just as many aren’t for those exact reasons. That proves that everyone has their individual tastes. Aishwarya Rai is a conventional beauty and although almost everyone can agree that she is at least pretty, not every single man on earth finds her to be their cup of tea, many prefer unconventional women like Jolie. Nobody is right or wrong in their preference so we can’t measure leagues because everyone’s opinion is different. Unless you want to use conventional standards as a prameter to measure what league someone is in, only not everyone is aware of what conventional beauty is.

AmandaYVR · Accepted Answer

No, I don't, not at all. I think it's kind of gross, actually. I don't believe in hierarchical societies. They exist, for sure, but it's not my thing. Whether it's about looks, or status, money, 'success', I have never made decisions based on these.
But personality and cultural differences - those are key. You cannot just skip over those and pretend they don't exist.

Sonorous · Accepted Answer

Yes, there are general leagues. If there weren't, we wouldn't be able to define who's at the bottom or the top of the attractiveness hierarchy. And we use those drastic differences to define where everything fits in-between. And it's also deeply intertwined with our survival mechanisms and why we find deformed &/or diseased people to be at the bottom.

But we we can see the blatant & common league differences when we pay attention to common behavior. It can even be studied and proved.

Now, since you said "dating" instead of only "attractiveness," there are also ways where people lower in the looks-tier hierarchy can get with someone placed higher on it. Common ways are if the person that is lower on it has money, fame, or status.

However, men are typically more willing to date lower even if the woman doesn't have all of that. She generally only has to be attractive to the man.

But women generally aren't willing to do the same. It's usually relative to their current placement in the dominance hierarchy. And they're hypergamous in nature, so they generally date up the dominance hierarchy.

rjroy3 · Accepted Answer

Yes and no, mostly no.

I don't believe your lot in life us determined by birth, we are more than the superficial. You can move up. That aside. The superficial does effect your outcomes to a degree, in relation to the value you provide.

Like I don't meet some girls superficial type but often times still have a shot because I'm good in other areas. Fun, funny, can relate to her where she's at, genuine, have helpful information that can benefit her life without me pushing it on her. And I can sincerely listen.

a lot of that shit isn't as common and that increases the value I offer in her eyes, so with respect to that girl I'm in a higher "league". There aren't leagues in the way people often talk about it.

But there are people who have higher value to you specifically than others based on your wants and desires. Humans have a lot of overlapping desires so there are commonly generally attractive people, but many outside that scope that provide in other areas have higher league value in the eyes of certain people.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

I don't accept the idea of leagues. I have dated women much more attractive than me and I have dated women less attractive than me. I have been attracted to women who I knew, by objective standards, were not considered attractive by other guys.

JosyJosy · Answer

In some situations I do.

"I WANT A PERSON WHO IS A HARD WORKER, SMELLS GOOD, AND EARNS A LOT"

Same person saying this has no job, doesn't bother to look for one either, and gives up on anything that takes some level of effort, also doesn't know what personal hygiene means

An extreme example perhaps, but in this situation I would say 'the person you want to date is out of your league'

kingjulienstoe · Answer

No not at all. I'm very popular at school, I'm friends with everyone, I know plenty of popular guys. I'm currently in a relationship with a guy who isn't as popular, kinda hangs out with his close circle. Definitely not in the same "social class" in school. Our relationship is great, we're both very happy. He's the best guy I could've asked for. Nobody is better than another person because they're more attractive or popular.

Qdbrown · Answer

People don't believe in it, but just watch how they behave. I have not seen too many stunningly pretty women marrying an ugly poor short guy. There is always an exception, but the rule pervails. Just ask any short, ugly poor dude. Heck, even his dog is having second thoughts...

MCheetah · Answer

Yeah, I do. People like to pretend physical attraction isn't a thing or that ugly people date attractive people all the time, but reality tells otherwise. I'm short and ugly. I would be willing to talk to girls "above my league,' but I know the chances of success are slim. Women are not attracted to short, overweight, dark-skinned, ugly dudes. It just is what it is. I don't really blame them. Just wish they were more honest about it, instead of BS'ing.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes, but not just in terms of physical beauty, but everything that makes up that person.

In the sense that if someone of the two feels heavily inferior to the other, or the other way around, the relationship becomes full of tension, I agree that this should not be an issue, but it is in many relationships. And most of the reasons are "he's much smarter than me", "she's much more beautiful than me", "he's much richer than me", "she's much cooler than me" etc.

The state-dependent choice theory suggests that females with lower qualities prefer males with lower qualities instead of males with higher qualities:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_intrasexual_competition#High_genetic_quality_of_the_males

johnsmithjs · Answer

Of course I believe in leagues, Give me 1 example of a good looking person in a relationship with a butt ugly person. It does not happen.

This does not count for rich people as they can basically purchase someone that is out of their league. For normal people, yes there are leagues.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes, I do because sometimes there are people that are just not attractive at all, okay looking but not butt ugly, or there's some really attractive people. Sometimes I see a really gorgeous girl with an unattractive guy and I'm just like damn she could do better in my opinion or the other way around.

DeltaCharlieEcho · Answer

Leagues aren’t standardized. I’ve never been with a woman that people didn’t think was out of my league. As average or below as I am I’ve dated and been engaged to chicks that did porn and were models.

Women aren’t worth what they think they’re worth so they rely on leagues for their self worth.

canucker90 · Answer

Yeah I do. I wouldn’t expect Kate Upton to say yes and go out on a date with me. She likes tall men who are rich. I’m 5’9 doing my masters in public policy and most likely work in law or the government but I won’t be “rich”. So yeah there are girls who have “leagues”.

RACSKC0B · Answer

Only guys have leagues, girls aren't generally as superficial. Which is probably part of the reason they end up with scumbags.
Ladies, if he won't make himself presentable to go out, you should probably not give him the time of day.

menina · Answer

Yes I do. I know there are guys who would never date me and I also would never date certain kinds of men.
I don't believe that anyone can be attracted to me, especially since I'm black. Not even black men are attracted to black women these days.

Azura_88 · Answer

WHY NOT?
Majority of people only want to have sex and make out rather than actual deep bond.
So yes LEAGUE MATTERS.
It's so unfair if an ugly, liar and dull person wants to f**k with a beautiful, honest and popular person and they start to emotionally manipulate that beautiful person. So yes you should have standards. Ugly people are ONLY LOYAL BECAUSE THEY DON'T HAVE A CHOICE.
Date a beautiful person because despite having many options they're still loyal to you!

Overmind · Answer

No, & the older you get the less that matters, in my opinion anyway; it becomes much more important that you're compatible & able to communicate effectively with one another.

invalid1 · Answer

I don't have league. I have types. If she is my type, thank you very much.  If she is not, I can still be attracted to her.  League is just another way some people satisfy their hubris.

genericname85 · Answer

absolutely. and i think everyone who deneis it, is a snoflake. there are "leagues". of course there are rare exceptions to all rules in life. exceptions don't disprove the rule.

DarcRefractions · Answer

no not really. u can get anybody if your money right, your funny and interesting or you got high status. I've seen fat dudes and skinny nerds with model looking chicks

bamesjond0069 · Answer

Yes leagues are true but you can cross them to some extent and leagues are not physical looks they are the whole package. Jeff bezos i dont think girls find beautiful but his league is perfect 10 girls because of his wealth and power for example.

pink_and_inlove · Answer

No but I do believe that some pretty girls date guys that are wayyyy too ugly for them and then they treat them like shit which I don’t understand

Anonymous · Answer

Yes i do. So i would never approach very handsome guys since i would be too ugly to them. I care about height but fortunately tall men with ugly/average face exist lool and men my age are very tall anyway

burlen · Answer

I didn’t even know dating leagues even exist. Hence, I have never believed in them.

MountAverage · Answer

Only to a degree. But I advise against taking it too seriously in dating. If you like someone, at least give it a shot instead of not even trying just because of "leagues".

Miristheiss · Answer

Yes... somewhat.  They aren't set in stone but tend to exist more than not.

taleswapper · Answer

OF course I am attractive to women, even though I look the gargoyle. Because they're not solely focused on looks.

Anonymous · Answer

YES. I’m pretty, intelligent, talented and funny. So if a guy were to be all of those it’d be great

neslihan86 · Answer

I believe in leagues unfortunately. I am average at best and have been chatting with a very good looking man who is very sweet and calls me sexy. He probably doesn't want a serious relationship and I am ok with this since life is too short.

SkellyManMark · Answer

Yeah I think leaves are a thing but not in a way that you're required to dat in your league but more of just something that you should go for to make things equal but you can always shoot for above your league or go below your league.

sp33d · Answer

Heard it being perpetuated left and right. Never cared, personally. People tell themselves all kinds of things.

JackofSpades · Answer

No... Until I want to be with someone and start feeling like I'm not good enough. Then my options start to change rather quickly.

Anonymous · Answer

I don’t believe in it, but I’ve heard the opinions of friends and Families. They do rate and comment on the physical aspects whether it’s me or my partners

Anonymous · Answer

Leagues exist, believing it or not is not part of the issue.
Some people have high SMV, others don't. In the modern market all benefits flow to the top 20%, if you are not top 20% you have no real chance at a fulfilling relationship.

EnglishEuropean · Answer

Yes, in fact the existence of these "leagues" has been proved by science. People may date out of their league but it doesn't lead to a relationship.

legalboxers · Answer

of course. she could be better looking, shitting out gold bricks, and everything else. and Id still say she's out of my league

Wise4myage · Answer

I do to some degree, but its also used as an excuse too.

scooogy · Answer

You mean that "league" of women who keep on whining where all the single men are?

Iron_Man · Answer

No I do not but you can tell if the person is classy or Trailor trash

crazy8000 · Answer

Nope. Never did. They that believes in it doesn't know better and needs to grow.

Anonymous · Answer

Of course but for men it's more about wealth and social status than looks.

FalconTakanashi · Answer

No. It's a load of bullshit, same as the so-called "friend zone."

NoLookingAtSoleil · Answer

Abortionists, prostitutes, girls next door, aristocracy?

InferiorElegy · Answer

I believe in leagues for sure, in fact I know from personal experience that they exist.

princeofromance · Answer

No, There are only the limitations you put on yourself.

Asianguy123 · Answer

Of course people are selective when it comes to relationship or sex. I was rejected and reject as well because of the league. Hahha

Anonymous · Answer

Always keep in mind that 96% of women peak between 15 and 22. Then it is a decline from there on. Many decline fast when they pack on the fat and develop rools. The all lose their youthful looks rapidly.

Pulseofsulfur · Answer

No. It's a type of toxicity that should be buried and left to die

Anonymous · Answer

Nope. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder; making the concept of leagues meaningless.

Chthou95 · Answer

I don't believe in leagues because if leagues exist, then looks are not subjective then.

Anonymous · Answer

the truth is not nice. They exist and if your a 3 your screwed.

PeacefulRainDrop · Answer

No such thing as leagues in my books

electromagnetic · Answer

date whom ever I want.

moejoeloli · Answer

In séduction most definitely

Anonymous · Answer

It's not always the case but for the most part yeah I do

zagor · Answer

No, they are a figment of the imagination.

msc545 · Answer

Like... bowling leagues? Sure!

anylolone · Answer

Not strictly but circumstantially yeah.

Xoirwinkan · Answer

That girl in the thumbnail is clearly not a 10.

ThinkSmart · Answer

To some degree yes but it's also intellectual.

Anonymous · Answer

yup! some people are hot

Miah02 · Answer

Nope

Bhavin2184 · Answer

No...

Do you believe in "leagues" when it comes to dating?

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