True or False: Somebody always catches feelings with a friends with benefits situation?

Question

rounddablock · Accepted Answer

Sex releases hormones in the brain. Women can get attached but men can too.

I guess if there is very thorough communication early that this is just what is THEN nobody sets unrealistic expectations. But then there are brain chemicals going on.

In my experience women absolutely hate hearing it when a guy outright. asks for friends with benefits. That has never worked for me even though that was plainly going on.

More commonly the girl hopes to date OR she cuts off the benefits and unrealistically wants “just friends”. Ah no. Bullshit. Once you crossed that line you crossed that line.

That is a sore point for me because there are 3-4 women who I briefly dated and got sexual with who tried to pull that bullshit later. One girl asked twice one time when I explicitly told her the friendzone would never be an option. We banged two more times and then asked for that crap again (she wanted to get out the picture to focus on someone else. Huge fucking insult (no pun intended). I told her no, best of luck and to hit me up she ever wanted to hook up again. We had a long kiss goodbye. I never heard back but at least i left with my self respect.

livin_hi_808 · Accepted Answer

I would have to say TRUE coach and have to say that it's guys who are the ones who catch feelz more often than girls. As guys we tend to express our emotions and grow our emotional bonds to girls through sex becoming ultimately our primary connection to themp. Whether its a positive or negative connection, it's the foundation and glue that gets us stuck wanting to maintain and preserve that relationship. Women get attacked by oxytocin (the love hormone) immediately after sex. Well after orgasmic sex at least which causes them to want to bond afterwards. But over time and the number of partners begin to add up, emotions and hormones begin to take different effects primarily on women because they've learned to cope with the effects of oxytocin and the rejection that tends to come from guys who are ignorant to the effects of sex on a female. In time leaving girls with a bit more calloused and less inclined to emotional vulnerability when they have deemed a relationship just a fling. Friends or not, she could cut it off a lot quicker and easier than an emotionally immature guy who still uses sex as a form of validation of true feelz for a girl.

Rei02 · Accepted Answer

We, specially women, have been programmed subcounsciously that having sex and falling in love are very, very connected. Having sex is an act of love, everything else is just meaningless or an act of violence and depravation.

Even though things have been changing, where having sex doesn't mean anymore that you necesarily need to be married, or having a formal love relationship, very deep of our being we still believe that sex has to be pleasure and a deeper connection with him/her.

However, generations have changed, and I am still believing that in the future sex will be casual, having sex with anybody even with you work colleagues or school peers, and love will be out, like in Brave New World, because they came to the conclusion that feelings and emotions like love only make people suffer and act irrationally.

Cynicaldreamer · Accepted Answer

I wouldn't know. I'm proud to say I don't do those kind of "relationships" (I use the term very lightly as that's not really a relationship in my opinion).

But more often than not, someone usually does- that's why I don't see how people get in those type of flings. Unless you're able to emotionally detach yourself from seeing the other person in a romantic manner, it seems like drama waiting to happen.

Unless you're just trying to get your primal, sexual urges met? I'm sure it's very possible not to catch feelings. But for the typical human? One of them will usually catch feelings, then get hurt when the other person wants to keep it "casual."

Brainsbeforebeauty · Answer

I would say false

TheorionMage · Answer

NEVER forget, the physical sensory stimulation BY NATURE has evolved over millenae to release addictive 'pleasure/bonding' neuropharmacology (Serotonin, Dopamine and Oxytocin) and every individual's addiction 'threshold' is affected by multiple factors~

Historically, obstinate Prisoners of the French Guiana penal colony 'Devil's Island' would be confined for long periods to solitary confinement where the sole pleasurable diversion was self-pleasuring. In due course, they willingly became masturbatory 'vegetable's ~

hannahjo022 · Answer

Depends on the person. When I was in my early 20's I had some friends with benefits but I never got attached and develop feelings for them and thought if I started a relationship with them I would lose that friendship after the breakup. I told that to a few of my former friends with benefits and they ended up stop talking to me which is weird since they only wanted to be friends with benefits. I stopped doing friends with benefits when I was in my mid 20's and got tired of it. It made me realized that I actually wanted to be in a relationship with attachment and have feelings for someone. But yeah it depends on the person how they feel about their friends with benefits and not all people catch feelings with a friends with benefits.

Bee-Hatch · Answer

Fucking hate that phrase "catch feelings" it belittles a normal human reaction trying to make it worthless, and gives a window into how fucked up some areas of society are. Having or developing feelings for another person is not only healthy, but normal. Repression of it- that is fucked up and should rightly be seen as the bad thing.

Daniela1982 · Answer

Most often, but not always. Some people are incapable of love and equate sex as their way of showing their feelings, but it is not real love but most often lust.

ChrisMaster69 · Answer

I went false on this one I had this for a while with couple friends
.

I need to have a high emotional attachment with sex, even then though as long as you are being honest with each other you don’t break your rules, friendship first.

yes it will happen now and then fuck know who does it most.

I've moved one to an apartment to cut down on travel, worked for both of us, I had someone looking after my property and decorate it, she got rent free for 6 months and was close to her Uni.

but no feelings to get in the way.

Anonymous · Answer

Someone's watching too many romcom and romantic movies. Yesterday there was a question "would you have a baby with a stranger for 1 million dollars".

Makes me wonder if some of the so-called Influencers are employed by G@G to keep traffic on the site, by asking cheesy and generic questions. Because clearly these aren't real-life situations

Sarahr123 · Answer

Yuck that photo umm no. Not that I’d ever do that. Emotions are separate to physical satisfaction. I don’t get attached to people easily.

williamstorm3 · Answer

I would say thats false but I would say that is most of the time what happens since sex is an intimate act where your literal private parts touch eachotehr and you get pleasure that sounds like something people who are close to eachotehr and feel comfortable with eachother do. So if there friends and they do something that is linked to romantic marriage activity, they will probably catch feelings at some point. Not gauranteed, but a very high possibility.

Screenwriter · Answer

Not sure if it always happens. But I'd agree that it's a regular occurrence and one that should be avoided.

Sex is a difficult thing to get involved in regularly with someone you aren't in a valid relationship with. There have to be strict boundaries if that is the case. friends with benefits is so slippery it leads to problems and dissatisfaction.

ChiTown33 · Answer

I don't have personal experience here but I'd imagine this is true. Because feelings/relationships are not equal and are dynamic not static.

purplepoppy · Answer

Sex by it's very nature is a bonding exercise. It's a great way to get to know people but I don't think it always leads as far as catching feelings

hikerunbeer · Answer

I think in order for a friends with benefits situation to work there has to be a certain level of trust. With that trust hopefully comes a certain amount of communication. If someone is catching feelings I'd hope you can share your feelings then decide if space is necessary in order to maintain the friendship.

electromagnetic · Answer

Not always the case but it does become a challenge with the other people decides they’ve met someone whom they’d like to have a committed relationship with.

Anonymous · Answer

False. If you pick someone you’re not that attracted to you aren’t going to catch any feelings any time soon if ever.

beebella · Answer

It probably happens more often than not, but I've never been in this situation, so I don't know. 🤷‍♀️

RingOfFire · Answer

Honestly I never saw the value in friends with benefits. I tried it many times when I was in my teens and 20s. But it was never really even close to as satisfying as sex with someone I love. I guess I just didn't really understand that back then. Eventually it became a boring waste of time. It's only about 10% of the experience. The other 90% is missing.

Minahh · Answer

I would say not always neccesarily but if you're being intimate with a person especially for a longer period of time there is a high chance that someone is going to develop feelings.

Alejandro3000 · Answer

You catch diseases and also by hooking up with all sorts you ruin your ability to really fall for someone

rjroy3 · Answer

False. But in most cases a degree of bonding takes place and an elevated level of care

True or False: Somebody always catches feelings with a friends with benefits situation?

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