If sexual attraction is present, do you think emotional attraction could develop?

[Anonymous]

My best friend (same gender) has said she was attracted to me. We’ve hooked up and all that, however, she says she’d never date a girl because she “doesn’t want the drama”. Seems kind of like a bullshit reason to me. What do you guys think? I’m okay either way. If she doesn’t want to, I’m fine being best friends but if she said she wanted to explore that more, I’d be interested. I’m just annoyed that she keeps coming on to ME, stirring up my emotions, participating, and then acts like it’s the weirdest thing ever when I ask her about it.

[TheBootyChest]

Maybe she just likes sex with women but not relationships.

How did you guys ever bring up the topic of you guys sleeping together?

[Asker]

We never really talk about it that’s what’s weird about it, is we’ll hook up but she refuses to have a conversation. It just sort of happened. At least on my end it wasn’t planned or anything.

[TheBootyChest]

In a perfect world, what would you want to have happen between you two?

[Asker]

I would want to explore it more. I don’t even know if I want to date her…up until this point I’ve considered myself straight and have never thought of a girl in that way…. but I enjoyed hooking up with her and want to at least do it more and see what happens.

[TheBootyChest]

thank you for being so open and sharing that with me.

Was there something about her that made you want to be with her, even if it was just sexually, or what is it that makes you not want to be interested in any other girl but her?

[Asker]

I honestly don’t know. I’ve never consciously thought, “oh wow, I’d love to be with her”. The sexual tension has been there for a few years it’s just been a recent thing that we’ve done something about it. So honestly, until it started happening, I just didn’t think much on it. I guess just after hooking up with her…. and realizing how much I liked it…makes me more curious. She is physically attractive I suppose and obviously we’re best friends so I like who she is also.

[TheBootyChest]

That's a very interesting point. That you like the person she is as much as her beauty. I know that having that strong of a bond can make you attracted to the person.

So think about this and tell me what you think.
If you met two new girls, one had the personality/bond of this girl (only), BUT the other girl had the looks of this girl and no personality, who would you be "tempted" to have sex with then?

[Asker]

No, I guess it’s more tied to her than it is to other women. I guess it’s a combination of all of the things. Physical attractiveness, plus the bond, plus we have hot sex.

[TheBootyChest]

Good points, sometimes we need to try and see things differently so we can better understand the first perspective clearer. Now you know it's all of the above with this girl.

Do you mind messaging me so I can ask you a respectful (NSFW) question?

[Asker]

Although, I have recently wondered if I should experiment with other women since she is acting immature about it. I don’t want to though. I would rather do it with her.

[TheBootyChest]

Well then try asking her for sex one more time and then see what she says. If she is pushing you away with that too then yeah it's hard to understand what she is thinking.

Just be careful that you don't ruin your feelings about sleeping with woman in general because you picked the wrong girl to sleep with next.

[Asker]

I just messaged you

[Asker]

Yeah, I guess that’s where my confusion is, because she came on to me I thought she’d be open to it. So I asked her if that was something she was interested in. She flipped out and thought I was trying to date her and kind of shut me down. So I thought okay maybe it was just a one time deal, then she came on to me again. 🤷‍♀️

[abc3643]

This is a very good question.
Absolutely. Most of the couples in history have likely started this way.

[Yourfriend2021]

That's how women are, they play mind games so now you know how men feel.

[Joker_]

I think so