Is he shy and doesn’t wanna seem desperate or is he not that interested?

[Anonymous]

A guy friend of mine confessed about a month ago to liking me as more than a friend yet he rarely ever takes initiative and always says maybe when making plans even if we end up meeting for sure...
there's definitely a connection and he seems to care for me - he was even curious to see my photos in my phone and wanted to know if I still talk to my exboyfriend... he always holds me in his arms and cuddles me and plays with my hair and he even brushed my hair for me...

im usually the one reaching out most of the time... is he shy? Or is he wanting to take things slow? Or is he not that interested?

Shy/ slow moving

Not interested at all

Updates

+1 y

He does have a learning disability and he does work a strainful overnite job 5 days a week

[LikeALog]

He's just slow. If he's holding you in his arms, cuddles you and plays with your hair he is interested in you.

You didn't mention how you interact with him other than you reach out. Are you responding in a way showing your interested in him? If you are then be just a little more aggressive, but don't come on strong.

[Asker]

What a good way of being more aggressive without scaring him off?

[molonski2]

He is just a bit shy , give him some really obvious encouragement , take the initiative.

[SiberFox]

From what you've written and the replies, he probably has little to no experience with relationships so he has no idea how to start one, and probably thinks that showing to much affection will put you off. Maybe ask him if he's got someone he'd like to go out with romantically?

[GoofyGal]

He is slow and work overnight job 5 days a week can be tiring. But hey, at least he is showing he is into you! Give it time and show that you're interested as well.
Just be honest with him and say, "Hey, I'd like for you to reach out with me once and awhile." Be honest. He cannot read your mind. :)

[mark000h]

Yes he's interested. He played with your hair and cuddled. That right there says he's into you.

[Asker]

I’m always the one reaching g out to him... is this out of shyness? Or is it his learning disability?

[mark000h]

Probably both. I don't know how bad is his disability but the things you described say yes he's into you and if you like him, you should keep at it. Have you gone out?

[Asker]

Yes twice in the last 3-4 weeks

[Asker]

He has an overnite job in a warehouse also that’s physically demanding as well... and he’s very much into sports, etc... and he lives in his own

[mark000h]

That's good. Is there another date? Maybe you can set something up with him. I don't get why he wouldn't if he's already gone this far. He likes you, you went out. He should continue... am i missing something?

[Asker]

He’s busy a lot of the time... or does he seem uninterested?
He’s also still a virgin at age 34

[Asker]

What do you think?

[mark000h]

I'm pretty sure he's interested from what you said. I just can't figure out why he's not continuing it? Did he give any sign why he hasn't asked to go out again? Busy or not, he's gotta have time for a phone call.

[Asker]

He does work a physically demanding overnite job in a warehouse... the last time we saw each other he wanted my phone code and grabbed my phone... he was closely looking at a photo of me and my exboyfriend... why would he do this?
Also I was hesitant to show him coz I didn’t want any miss understanding

[mark000h]

Don't give no phone passwords. He's working but he still gotta have 5 minutes to say "hey i had a good time wanna go out again"... not hard once you're already in the door. I don't know why he isn't, maybe text him and ask what's up, see if he answers. If not, then probably just give it a rest until something happens w him

[Asker]

I gave him my phone password and he gave me his... why did he behave that way? And did it look suspicious on me if I was hesitant to let him see this photo of me and my exbf?

[Jamie05rhs]

Sharing phone passwords seems a bit much at this stage in the game.

[Anonymous]

I vote A, and it's a reminder of something that I've always hated and I know will never change

[Anonymous]

This 2021 so it isint weird if you take the initiative.

[Jamie05rhs]

What's his relationship history?

[Asker]

He’s 34 years old and still a virgin...

[Asker]

Does it sound like he’s intersted? Or is he moving slowly with me?

[Jamie05rhs]

Oh. That guy.

[Jamie05rhs]

I think he's shy.

[Asker]

He’s interested in me but shy?
Also why can’t he give clear answers? Is it his learning disability?

[Jamie05rhs]

Yes.

How pronounced is his learning disability?

[Asker]

He’s slow to learn... that’s what he said

[Jamie05rhs]

Oh, okay. That makes sense.

[Asker]

Do you think it’s that? Or do you think he’s overwhelmed with work?

[Jamie05rhs]

Maybe both. I'm not sure. But I would give more weight to the "slow to learn" theory.

[Tomtom9494]

I thought shyness makes a man a pussy bitch

[Lovesims3plumbob]

just shy

[OddBeMe]

Take the next steps.