I keep seeing people on my posts say they couldnt turn down a smoker among other things because they’re not attractive enough to have a dating preference. Thats honestly a sad mindset. Its disheartening. So here’s a few words of encouragement that even the cockiest mf may need to hear every once in a while when they’re feeling down... *puts on my Morgan Freeman voice*... THERE IS SOMEONE OUT THERE FOR EVERYONE! IT IS TOTALLY OKAY TO HAVE PREFERENCES AND A GOOD SET OF STANDARDS. NEVER SETTLE FOR LESS. JUST BECAUSE YOU MAY NOT BE ATTRACTIVE TO ONE PERSON DOES NOT MEAN YOU WILL NOT BE ATTRACTIVE TO ANOTHER. IT IS NOT BK. YOU CANNOT ALWAYS HAVE IT YOUR WAY. BUT STILL, I HAVE A DREAM, THAT ONE DAY YOU WILL FIND WHAT YOU ARE LOOKING FOR. AND IF YOU DONT FIND THEM, THEY WILL SURELY FIND YOU. ONE CALL THATS ALL. LIKE A GOOD NEIGHBOR, STATE FARM IS THERE. AND YOU ARE IN GOOD HANDS WITH ALLSTATE. REMEMBER THIS— YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH. FCK THEM HOES WHO TELL YOU OTHERWISE. #FeelFreeToList#YouAreGoodEnough#TheresSomeoneForEveryone
I dont feel good enough
I feel I am good enough
I know I am more than enough
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Yea but this question isn't about standards exactly. It was meant to uplift those who feel they dont deserve to have standards. Everyone is good enough to want something equal or better. You shouldn't have to settle for bottom of the barrel bum bits because some superhot person dogged you out. Fck them hot pocket hoes
Do you feel like you are not good enough to have standards?
I feel the same way you do, it's a very sad mindset that will only destine them for failure, as being willing to take what you can get because you don't feel deserving of anything but the bottom of the barrel screams "I don't love or respect myself", which manipulative people are very drawn to. Not to mention, no one can ever be happy settling for someone they know is not for them. Fitting a round peg into a square hole doesn't work.
It's very possible to keep standards realistic while also having them. You don't need to accept someone who treats you like shit just because that's all you feel is available for you. Being single is SO much better than being in a miserable relationship, and it's really sad how many people believe otherwise.
Tbh, been single so long, not sure i want to date. I kinda enjoy being single. Before anyone says something stupid not because i like sleeping around. Because i enjoy the freedom of not having to keep someone else happy
Option D - Other. I don't feel good enough for the currently existing (shallow) women on this planet, but I still have standards.
I think everyone has standards. The difference is, are your standards realistic and can you meet your own standards? I don't think a 2 out of 10 should be demanding a 10 out of 10 (especially the ladies on dating apps).
As for what are my standards? I've said them before: Don't be a feminist/man-hater/woke. Don't be queer (gay). Don't be polyamorous/the "open relationship" type (unfaithful). Don't be abusive. Don't be a non-biological woman (transgender/male). Don't do sex work. I don't think these standards are "too much" to ask for.
As for my type? Besides being tall, I basically look for a female version of me. Thick girls are my jam.
But I know, I know... The human women of planet Earth aren't attracted to me and never could be. It's unfair, but it is what it is.
Yea but this question isn't about standards exactly. It was meant to uplift those who feel they dont deserve to have standards. Everyone is good enough to want something equal or better. You shouldn't have to settle for bottom of the barrel bum bits because some superhot person dogged you out. Fck them hot pocket hoes
I don't believe there's someone out there for everyone. I also don't believe women ever have to worry about being alone or never finding a partner, either. Loneliness is pretty much a male issue. But I appreciate the positive message you're trying to convey out here to others.
I agree with you. I have certain standards too that people on here may not like. If they try to shame me for my standards then fuck them. I'm not ashamed to admit what I like and don't like. I don't want a man that's extremely poor and I don't want one that doesn't take covid seriously (like not getting vaccinated and wearing a mask). I also don't want a man who's anti abortion and even trash talks or shames other women for getting them.
I want a reasonable and empathetic man. I'm a pisces so I expect him to have some empathy. Plus I don't want a man who is a smoker and/or an alcoholic. There are other standards I have too but I'm not going to list all of them here. I may get some downvotes for this answer but this is my raw and unfiltered opinion. I'm not afraid to be honest about this topic.
See honestly speaking i am a shy , introvert guy, who can't even say hi to a girl he likes, not at all confident one... not an outgoing guy, and not at all good in looks.
So i would say first a girl would look if i am handsome or not, she won't find it then she would look am i confident enough so answer is no, then she would look am i having social circles at least then a big no.
So why would a girl choose a guy like me... girls Always have better options always. Like they have plenty of guys giving attention to them. Why would a girl would waste a time on me? ...
I'm very big on encouraging other people to lobe themselves (you know this firsthand lol). I sometimes forget to follow my own advice. And dealing with the narcissistic and manipulative people that I've dealt with in the past, I have fallen back into those feelings of not being good enough and settling for anyone/anything. But I've been doing a lot of soul searching and I'm getting myself back to that place I worked my ass off to get to. I'm dope AF and it's absolutely ok if I have standards. Never settle for less than what you know you deserve!!!
all of my preferences are realistic and I shouldn't have to compromise who i am to be with somebody. Compromises should be like "okay well she doesn't like video games but plays them with me, so i'll tone them down a few hours a week to spend more time doing things she would like." or "I really love Indian food but she's more into Spanish food. Okay we did Indian last week, so I'll surprise her with Spanish Friday night and make her a mean dish." or "She really hates watching the game and she's been dying for us to attend that winter ball. Guess I'll go." That's the kind of compromises couples SHOULD make. Not on values and stuff though.
I find that if I stick to certain genres of games instead of others i dont have issues. Like if I just have a nintendo console I spend less time on it weekly because the games for that system are more linear. You put an open world RPG in front of me I'm going to have issues putting it down UNLESS I have played the shit out of it for a while. I know it used to be really, really bad for me when Fallout 4 first came out. I was glued to a screen for 3 months tbh. But I was also running away from my internal demons. I think the reason why so many guys are into games like that these days is because of personal demons and skeletons and we have issues resolving them. Especially since us talking about our problems is "unmanly". Its a shame and I know you and I both know a few guys on this forum who post things about women or self image issues that run to video games to comfort them rather than trying to face their problems and make improvements.
Yea thats what annoyed me. He olayed online games that never technically end so like someone would raid him while he was offline so he stayed online. But if i met a guy who played offline or at least played games like 2K and Forza or N4S then that should be better
i only play single player games. Even the games that allow multi I dont play online. I grew up in the 90's and I like soloplayer mode. Fallout 4, Skyrim, Pokemon, and the Total War series make up 90% of the games i play tbh
Double Dash with a person playing right next to. THAT was the experience you'll never get again. One person driving and one person throwing the weapons. And then switching up. So much fun!
I'm sure we all have standards but some people have unrealistic standards. They think they are much better then thay really are. Initial attractions are meaningless without substance. I once dated a woman I would rate as a 9 for looks and a 10 for sex but soon discovered she was a 0 for personality and was only interested in herself. Didn't last long as I couldn't couldn't have a meaningful conversation with her. Nobody will check all the boxes for what we want but as long as the really important ones are there, the possibilities of a lasting relationship are there if you choose to try. To me the key traits are honesty, intelligence, sense of humor and confidence.
Yea but this post is for those who dont think theyre worthy of anyone. They take whatever they can get and it shouldn't be like that. They shouldn't have to settle for less than
Always being told you're not, your entire life from everyone, friends, family and strangers makes you believe it to be the only truth, on the other side when random people on the internet tell you that you are and that you're handsome is momentarily uplifting until you realize they never even seen what you look like so it's hard to believe those words. You know you can show people what you look like to prove they are just like everyone else and they'd make fun of you or they'd ghost you and past experiences have shown you this to be true so hiding yourself and having no trust is a less painful way to live.
There can't be someone out there for everyone, that's contradictory to statistics and even if there was someone for me, she's probably been dead a very long time or she's somewhere I'll never get to go to before I die and since every other female sees me as ugly and not worth anything, I'll die alone.
I don't think I ever felt good enough. Even at a very early age. My moms opinion mattered the most and she never made me feel like I was pretty. I rarely got a compliment from her and she was quite critical. By 8th grade I started to notice that I was not pretty. Guys were really rude to me and they would kind of bully me. By high school (age 16) I just hated myself and developed bdd. I never got asked to prom, a date etc. Nothing other normal girls experience. I've had a lot of people in my life both friends and family make me feel less than about my looks. Having a pretty mom made it all worse. Here I am 24 with no boyfriend or first kiss.
Feeling good enough is not easy. I needed a lot of therapy. I still struggle but I can cope with my imperfections a lot better than before. I really hated myself back then. Now I just pour all my energy into people I love. I would like to help other girls who feel this way.
Hmm. Judging for someone smoking is definitely a negative indicator for personality in my book. Sorry but, it relieves stress, things feel easier to deal with. And unless it's directly impacting health right then, I'd take it as a bad sign that someone is probably gonna judge me for other stuff I do.
Im judgmental and have no problem with that. But the point is that some people feel they have to settle for whatever they can get and they shouldn't have to feel that way. A few Bad apples shouldn't spoil the whole bunch
Priorities changed as I got older. But basic core values never change. in my 20s, I wanted a man with a certain set of qualities, now that has changed… but inner core values still the same. core values.. you already know. things changes that I accept… he doesn’t have to be the tallest or make the most money or have the best job… but he must have the qualities I look for.
"We, Who are of the Light live only to Serve... Praying for Those too blinded... Fighting for Those unable, and... Teaching All... Who but genuinely ask. Knowing that in the fullness of Time Death holds no sway. We... Who are of the Light" ~
Problem is, these average females have been given too much power because of the betas, simps, manginas and white knights who are even worshiping at the feet of average and below average females (faatties and chics with no curves, t! ts or azz). It's gotten to their heads and now their standards are way too high.
I may not be good enough for some people, but I'm still entitled to have some standards and date someone I think fits me well enough. I think everyone should have some standards and don't settle with anybody just because they feel unworthy of something good in their lives
yes and thats reasonable to have, it would be stupid to be picky... i dont think any girl in the whole world would like or want me... if im lucky that a girl in this world likes me, i have to jus take her for what she is cos no other girls in the wworld will like me., beggers can't be choosers and i can't be cocky or full of myself, i remain humble and take whatever crumbs come my way
no offence but people who have high standards and only take perfect guys jus seem like stuck up egotistical bitches to me, u ain't perfect hun, so stop wishing for perfect to be yours
I am humble. I never asked for perfection and i never listed my standards for you to judge. I listed a paragraph with words of encouragement to those who have no standards
Honesty, had this been posted a few years back, I would've felt that way. Though not as awful as you described 😂 I may not have standards, but I do live by a moral conduct. And no matter how desperate I may be, I'll never like someone who I don't see fit based on my moral standards.
I have my definite standards, or else I should already have been married---and unhappily at that. The world needs standards. No matter how old or ugly you are or think you are, be true to yourself and never settle. It is worth it in the end, to be true to yourself.
I believe I am good enough for any girl I get involved with. I think I have the qualities and requirements a girl wants. I think I can satisfy a girl emotionally, mentally and sexually to make her happy.
I don't feel like I'm wanted enough to even have the conversation about standards, but I still have them because if it doesn't matter whether I have them or not anyway, I'd rather have standards than not have them.
Thank you for this. This came at the perfect timing. I feel I do have a few standards. Like the guy being someone, I can see talking with for hours and making me laugh no matter how cheesy his jokes are. I finally found a guy like that who I can't help but simp over but I always feel as if I'm not good enough to even just be friends with him. So again this was a good reminder to stop putting myself down and let what happens happens
I know I'm wholesome... but I don't have standards to measure other people, I will always seem them for their true worth, and not a list to check on my book, never done that in the past, anyway...
Nahh I'm way to high maintenance and liiiiittle arrogant for sure lmao I don't lower my standards but expect others to get their ass up to match mine at least a little
I feel I'm good enough but I never set my standards real high on a girl but I'm careful who I decide to date or be in a relationship with and I don't judge a girl on anything
I used to. But that was also the time in my life where I'd have rather swallowed a bullet than got up in the morning, so I didn't care about my safety.
I always thought I'd give any girl a chance if they are nice but I do have preferences, not necessarily on looks but for one I need a spark between us and her not being like 6 months pregnant, nothing wrong with her being pregnant but knowing that her motive is looking for a daddy for her baby that isn't mind I couldn't do
I am poor and studying in grad school. Women don't like that, as men of similar age have higher income and time, so they can spend a lot of time only having fun. I know I can't afford that now. Perhaps later in life, when I will make more money I will have high standards too.
Nah, I've never felt insecure before, but I do worry I'm running out of time because other people settle, and might take all my best match options before I do, leaving me with no options worth marrying.
I'm not saying I'm the best a woman can get, but I know for certain that I'm one of a kind. People who downplay themselves only limit themselves to the bare minimum.
Preach girl. That's the most beautiful post I've seen of you. Some people once told me (even my parents said that) "don't be so picky or you'll be alone your whole life. Well, obviously I don't expect to date Brad Pitt but how am I going to have sex with a guy I'm not physically or emotionally attracted to? I'd rather be single my whole life than compromise and date someone just for the sake of it. I'm sorry it annoys some people that much that I'm single
I still have my standards but I feel like as of right now that I am not in a position to be dating especially since I have nothing secure yet. So my standards are put on hold but only because im focusing more on myself.
I want to hear your Morgan Freeman voice... lol. And for those who think they are not good enough... If you don’t then who will? You hold the key to your success.
My list really isn't that hard tho. I've met plenty who met them all. But those people also ended up being a smoker or someone who wanted sex month one. So thats what took them off the table
I want a woman who is honest, caring, affectionate, has not been addicted to drugs or pills (weed is fine), doesn't need a babysitter when drinking, doesn't have mental problems and hasn't taken psych meds, has common sense enough to keep herself safe and out of trouble, isn't fatter than me, can cook as good as me or better, and doesn't have a face like a bulldog. Pretty simple I think haha
Calling yourself beta is what gets you in that silly mindset. Stop it. The only alpha beta shit is in sororities, fraternities and wolf packs. I doubt you're in either cause you’d pretty much have to be cocky to be in those. Having a small dick has its perks. She won't choke when she deep throats. Cheer up bud
Well if you did care about dating then you’d want to choose someone who catered to your well being. But since you dont care about dating then disregard ig
I have really high standards. I completely understand how average girls feel when interacting with average guys because I feel the same way about average girls.
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