Do guys lose interest when you don’t kiss them on the first date?

[Anonymous]

I strongly believe that kissing and sex should not be rushed in a relationship. I recently went on a date with a guy who I think wanted to kiss but I didn’t encourage it. After that date he had been working and then went to a family trip. When we last talked and I asked to go out again he said he would have loved to hang out but that he was going away for a trip. He hasn’t really been in touch for a week which makes me think that either he is genuinely busy and doesn’t want to talk till he’s back or that he lost interest because I didn’t kiss him. I don’t regret my decision but it just sucks because I don't know what he thinks.

[SenileOldMan]

I used to move super fast when I was younger. Hold hands within the first hour or two, kiss by night time, sex at the end, although in baby steps. Worked almost every time. But I was very careful to be attentive to the girl's mood and make everything flow naturally.

Yet there was this one date where I miscalculated. We held hands, we danced, and we kissed. And she even kissed me back but after like 10 minutes of making out, she said she felt like I was moving too fast. So that was a bit confusing to me since I never made it this far where the girl stopped me. But I didn't question her interest that much since she still seemed to be doing everything to show interest like messaging me, continuing to have dates with me.

But I turned hardcore gentleman for her, maybe too much. She ended up inviting herself to my apartment practically and had to basically initiate making out and sex herself since I didn't know when I should make moves after that.

[DaveJord]

I think when two people don't vibe they lose interest. When something feels right, it happens organically... 1st date or 5th date. Some one who comes into a potential relationship with idea that they never kiss on the first date, seems like someone who isn't really interested in giving me fair chance, because they are already closed minded and putting their beliefs and values ahead of mine. But people you have intimacy or sex issues and demand more time to feel comfortable regardless of the other person... well I don't vibe with that. Just seems that everything has to be on their terms and there is something selfish about it. Some would say I am selfish... but if I don't vibe with a person I just don't vibe and I move on with hopes of finding the right person for me. You can't force it, and if she's not the one she's not the one.

[CrazyGirl2]

Sweetie, if a guy was truly interested, then you not kissing him on the first date wouldn’t change a thing… IF he was truly interested in YOU, and not just rushing things past what you are comfortable doing!

[Asker]

Or maybe he just wants to go on dates without strings attached lol

[ChrisMaster69]

@CrazyGirl2 exactly

[ChrisMaster69]

Not having or having a kiss on the first date means nothing really.

had loads of dates without a kiss on first date.

i tend to be relaxed and won’t push things.

i am more interested in date 3 than date 1.

if he is interested then he will go for date 2, if he’s not then he won’t, the fact there was no kiss should have bugger all to do with it.

if it does then you are better off without him tbh.

[Asker]

I can’t tell if he will want a date 2. He’s on a trip which is understandable but he hasn’t talked about wanting to meet again. Either he is a bad planner or he changed his mind. I will be deleting him from my IG if the situation is the latter

[ChrisMaster69]

Have you asked him if he fancies a follow up date once he’s sorted?

[Asker]

Well I didn’t know he was going to travel when I asked to meet again. That said, he replied to my message saying that he would love to meet “but he might be going away, however, if he doesn’t we will make plans. However, he has not commented on whether he is planning to meet when he’s sorted as you said.

[Asker]

Sure, he doesn’t sound like he is closed to the idea of meeting up but he might be one of those guys who says things out of courtesy

[spartan55]

And you probably won't ever know what he thinks. This drives girls nuts because they have to have some sort of explanation for literally everything, and also 'understand' it. Sometimes recognizing this is impossible and moving on is the best approach.

[awkward_author]

I definitely wouldn't lose interest if the date went well. Some people don't kiss on the first date, and that's totally fine with me.

[Jamie05rhs]

If you don't know what he thinks, then talk to him and find out.

[Asker]

Nah that’s clingy thing to do

[Jamie05rhs]

Okay. Suit yourself.

[rabbitzzz]

Maybe he has big ego or isn't interested in you.

[Anonymous]

Some do. But that's ok.

[LegendaryIcon]

some might