As a guy who is trying to find the right girl and be in a relationship with and get married there are plenty of factors. I grew up with 3 older sisters, I got in trouble just for having pictures of Britney Spears on the back of my wall and my sisters fooled around with guys, hypocrisy at its finest. My guy friends did whatever they wanted and I didn't do that stuff I was too shy to approach girls/women. I didn't have confidence in myself. If I tried to articulate my life or how I feel, girls on GAG or Yahoo Answers or forums would ridicule me just for suggesting to approach a girl.
Eventually I said fuck it. I don't care what family thinks, I don't care what my guy friends do, I shouldn't take things to heart if people give awful advice online. Just work on myself to better myself - work, school, health, hobbies, activities, have faith, understand that not every girl will like you and I will most likely get rejected a lot but keep trying. Be a good dude, genuine, warm and funny and just try. That's my approach to rejections and how I deal with them. I won't take them personally.
It’s all about accepting that life is really hard and shit things will happen.
Part of that is relationships, they take a fair bit of commitment and work. The starting point is that initial asking.
it’s really hard as it’s an unknown, often more so if no flirting has went on and it is a huge unknown.
personally the best thing is to reduce those risks of rejection, learning to read body language, tones of voice, flirting and how the other person responds to it.
all this helps reduce the risk of rejection, however it still happens, when it does, accept that you will crash and burn, just accept it, dust yourself off and get ready for the next one.
Tbh it’s easier crashing and burning when younger as you don’t feel it as much, as you get older, it can get a bit meh. However same rule applies, accept it happens and move on with life.
Thanks for MHG
I’m a hardcore introvert just turned 31 and I haven’t changed much since I was young
I’m not shy anymore bc I am old and confident but I came to accept and realize being an introvert is part of a personality and I’m proud of it.
We don’t need only mother fu**** who talk every minute every day in this world —we also need people as us.. as we are , quite and peaceful.
So it’s ok the way you are
How not to fear rejection? By knowing that rejection is actually a blessing ,, it might seem like the end of the world but in reality you are lucky getting rejected because you don’t want to spend your precious time and life with people who don’t deserve you. A better door will open ! You have to be patient to see it.. that’s all.
Also know that you will reject people too.. it’s part of life , don’t take life serious too.
We are here to life life simply. Take what you have and leave forgot what you don’t have. Don’t be hard on yourself.
Same thing I was going to say. I still deal with fear of rejection. Most people Do... hehe
But if tour desire for something is bigger than your fear, you jump in.
You don't even have to always make the first move...1) just put yourself in the right setting. Be open and welcoming. You can start a conversation with anything low key, I like your pet, what time is it😂 , real life right? Not online?
Drop your Cinderella shoe even...
You don't want to be desperate but subtle and see how they engage and if they are interested but 2) ensure to learn about red flags so you don't end up in toxic relationships
3) create a life you love. Style, hobbies, etc
3) is because well obviously if you don't love your life... and are bored.. jt isn't exactly attractive to many people
Opinion
61Opinion
u The only way I know to get beyond the fear of rejection is to experence rejection a few times, live through the process, and come to the realization that it's not fatal.
That's literally what ever guy has to deal with. As a woman you don't have to worry about it. Men will come to you, especially ones as pretty as you. I'm 30 years old and I've always feared rejection but I know that if I never make any moves I'll never get anywhere. Unfortunately I have gotten rejected by literally every woman I've asked out besides one that I met a couple years ago at work but she turned out to be kinda... unstable so that just makes it even more difficult/scary for me. Most of my relationships that I've had have been initiated online.
Same, it's a shame cos girls hardly ever get rejected, but guys veg rejected so much.. it's a major blow to our self esteem as guys... I feel worthless and unwanted
😢😢😢
Yeah lol
I am not a dating expert, but from what I have heard are, this I think is universally applicable to all humans, from multiple different sources give different perspectives: (1) Go out your comfort zones more often but don’t drag it. (2) Find out your strengths & weaknesses when it comes to dating. (3) Maybe try to find someone the same as you, start with someone easy in terms of both looks & personality point of view, then once you build the confidence, take it up a notch. (4) I would also recommend following and / or subscribing to relationship expert channels & accounts, make sure they are reputable & genuine but not a scam, which is what I am doing as a male who identifies as being straight, I have both types of perspectives: male & females, that are also in the game themselves.
It will probably never go away completely you just have to face your fears. Be honest with yourself. If you have feelings for someone you need to be honest and tell them how you really feel. Don't hold back and play games. You have to be willing to take the chance and to put yourself out there. If you get rejected you just have to accept it that everyone is not everyone's type and take comfort in the fact that you won't have regrets going forward. You won't always think "what if" and look back with regret. Keep taking chances and putting yourself out there and you'll meet those who won't reject you and will accept you.
I work a lot way up high on ladders lifts etc, often on lethal voltages..
if I didn't have some fear I'd probably get myself killed.
Fear is a good thing as long as you don't let it overcome you. But here is YOUR ADVANTAGE as a women.
You are far more likely to get a positive response then a man approaching a women by a large margin.
You are almost completely free of any negative reaction, it's unlikely , no matter how awkward your approach to have any negative conciquences , again this is the opposite of what a man risks doing the same thing.
The ball is in your court, it's up to you to play the game or sit around alone.
I think you can’t get rid of the fear but you can get through the fear by remembering constantly that we’re ALL collectively scared of being rejected. Dating and making moves is scary for every man and every women. We’re all humans and we all have feelings. But sometimes some things are worth taking a risk.
Also if you focus on the end result it can help you accept rejection more easily. For example, if you really want to be in a nice relationship and you get rejected, focussing on the fact that this person couldn’t give you the relationship you wanted and that somebody else will helps you move on for. They rejection.
If you get rejected your life will still continue, your home will still be the same home. Your food will still be eaten. The moon will still be in the sky. You will still have your same friends. You won't die, you won't get hurt. Your life stays the same. We can live til we are a 100 years old potentially. So when are you going to live a little? Take a few chances. Dare to do a little bit. "you regret more the things you never did, then the things you have done". Also "the only limitations you have is the limitations of your imagination"
The worst thing the girl can do is say no.
It will feel like end of the world but it not.
it won’t kill you.
work on loving yourself. only you know yourself know that you are worthy of a relationship look at the good qualities in yourself.
Work on what you love doing hobbies? And the good qualities about you.
I recommend meditation and reading on mindfulness.
affirmation meditations and practicing saying things out loud or in your head. Like I am worthy, I am a good person.
Can I ask you a question
@xboxfan1213 yeah sure
Would you reject a great man just because he doesn’t have a huge penis
@xboxfan1213 no I wouldn’t
This was difficult for me when I was your age. It is important to keep in mind that people have all sorts of different preferences, inclinations, and personalities. The healthier you are, the more attractive you will be to men in general but this does not mean every man will want to date you. The best way to handle rejection is to think about this, not take it personally, and realize that a guy who rejects you is doing you a favor by not wasting your time or taking advantage of your attraction to him. Remember that you’re seeking someone who enthusiastically wants to be with you.
I used to be and sometimes still am very shy (until I know someone) but I would go into things figuring I would be rejected and then if I wasn't, it was good.
Something else I used to do, that no one should is don't get too invested. I used to get soo invested in making a move, that I would think and plan for weeks and when I'd get rejected it devastated me.
Instead I learned to be more casual, try not to worry about and not get soo invested until after we had dated a bit.
Same for me and I am currently seeing a psychoanalyst to work on myself. Maybe you can get a professional help? But there is a rare case of people that found the strength to surpass their fear. Maybe you have that strength? I know I haven't but maybe you have. It's honestly the only solutions I can think of. Sorry and I hope you can overcome this fear!
Don't overthink this, just go for it and see yourself.
Being rejected is not that bad, sure it's uncomfortable sometimes but at least you tried! That's already pretty amazing and approaching gets easier with each time.
Also like being rejected doesn't mean, that something is wrong with you or shit, it's just simply means that this person doesn't want to get to know you better. And that's fine, the person does you a favor and also you won't waste unnecessary time
There are billions of girls out there.
If not her, then someone else!
If not that one, then also someone else!
No shortage of girls is there. It works.
Confidence over rejection will only be there when you have had sufficient amount of rejections. I really cannot see any other way.😐🙂
You shouldn't think about them like they're something premium... Take everything easy... You liked them tell them there's equal chance that they'd accept or reject... When it comes with a rejection just think that as a good sign.. maybe they were nothing good for you that's why it doesn't work out... And if it comes with accepting your feelings then just don't hesitate to love them the fullest... take everything easy life is not that hard as we think it is😊
I don't know if anyone said but just do it. What's the worse that could happen, they punch you?
However, I'm still working on it as well but I'm gaining much more confidence knowing my time is limited. And if I don't do the thing, then I'll regret doing it. I don't know if this helps but this really was a tough one.
It isn't so much about getting rid of the fear. No one likes getting rejected. What you have to practice pushing through the fear. Once you get used to that, you will just see the adrenaline rush and your brain trying to talk you out of stuff as part of the process. Also, let go of expectations.
Go out and ask a bunch of guys you don’t know that you find attractive for their number.
You might get rejected a few time but your bound to get a few numbers as well it’s a good confidence building exercise and it’ll help you get over rejection by experiencing it. And when you do get a number I’ll feel great.
Your not not at all unattractive so you’d probably get plenty of numbers.
I stopped caring about the risks when approaching a woman. It started out by me challenging myself to approach 100 women in a few months time. I tell you this, when engaging in a conversation and reading body language becomes easy, you can basically approach most people and not worry about the outcome. If they reject you, oh well, they did you a favor
You've just got to experience it and let it go. I think it is harder for women because they aren't as accustomed to rejection. A baseball player who gets 3 hits out of every 10 at bats is considered a good hitter, but he is failing 70% of the time. Most guys are rejected a higher proportion of tries than that.
Watch courage the cowardly dog he wasn’t a coward at all he was just aware of the danger not being afraid doesn’t make you brave fear is natural courage was scared out of his mind but never let it stop him from saving the day fear becomes a problem when it stops you it’s okay to be scared
intresting, so are people who scare easy more intelligent since they realise the dangers more than "brave" people?
@KoolKidKv93 well I’d say they’re more observant and are able to quickly analyze situations they have a strong intuition I guess that would make them smarter but only because they pick up on things others don’t notice and pay more attention to their surroundings you ever see someone that you’ve never met you just saw them and instantly they didn’t really sit right with you like if a guy comes in a store with a ski mask that’s probably the go ahead to get tf outta there 😂 attention to detail saves lives
hm intresting lolol, iv always been sort of like courage the cowardly dog always seeing dangers around every corner, maybe i jus need to dumb myself down and not worry so much lol
but yeah lol i think u jus gotta decide which risks are worthy of putting yourself in danger for, for example if a lion is infront of you... u dont walk up and slap it to try n scare it away... but a small risk that is unlikely to happen... is more smart to take, like flirting with a girl or doing some skateboarding stunt, otherwise fear will stop u living ur life lol
@KoolKidKv93 it’s important to take time out of the day to chill and relax even if it’s just a few seconds because if most people paid attention they’d be terrified too a lot of people don’t know how cruel this world really is
yeah lol
@KoolKidKv93 yes exactly
Kinda hard in today's society when people are so rude and random people online are always trying to insult you and knock down your self esteem,
Guess the only way is to grow thicker skin and not take anything personal and realise that it's nothing to do with you, it's jus that a lot of people are bully assholes with emotional problems who wanna hurt you, I'm sure you're a great person so don't take anything personal, you look very pretty by the way x
If that picture is you, I don't think you are going to get rejected too often unless you act like a crazy person. You probably aren't going to be rejected by guys who want to hang out with you or act attracted to you. A lot of guys who fear rejection are afraid to make a move. If you find a guy who you like, act like you actually want him around. Maybe he's too dumb to figure it out, but most guys will.
I dunno... I'm still trying to figure that out myself. I've been rejected a million times and it still hurts every time so I jus gave up trying
But I guess you would have to understand why it doesn't matter when a guy rejects you and try to feel numb and not care about.. I could explain to you why it's not an insult or something you should be sad about if a guy rejects you if you eantt.
But yeah... You jus gotta learn to not care when you get rejected, and don't let it hurt you
If you want*
The first thing is there will always be rejection at some point.. you will never get everything you ask for in life.. If you get rejected don't worry about it happens to everyone... Just walk away and think about the next "task at hand" I look at it like a challenge now. ..
I have been rejected by a girl and when I approached her friend she got upset then stated flirting with me. Lol. She list her chance and I ended up with her friend that night.
You grow up! I don't mean that condecending but actually. When you get older, have responsibilities and many many experiances you'll learn to put the many things in life into perspective. Getting rejected will then seem like nothing compared to much else life throws your way.
Cbt. You experience it with slow steps.
If you're afraid of spiders first step is looking at it. Second step touching it. Third step holding it. Dropping a tarantula in your hands will only freak you out so small steps.
You just have to accept that you may get rejected and be okay with it. Otherwise you may stay single the rest of your life.
And don't make the mistake of thinking if you get rejected that guys must not like women taking initiative. If men did that the human race would have gone extinct long ago.
Iwas often afraid of rejection. A guy I knew used to ask out any girl he thought looked interesting. He got turned down a lot but also went out on a lot of dates. He told me that the worst thing that can happen is the say no.
It's about your self confidence. Work on yourself understand that not everyone is going to like you and that's okay. It takes work but can be done if you put in the work
By realizing none of it matters. Experience shapes us bc we learn from it… hiding is just slowing your learning curve. Adults have confidence and all the answers bc we have thick skin, we have thick skin bc of experience… jump in and experience life. It gets better every moment you move forward.
You don't.
You learn how to handle it instead.
First time will be your hardest, but after that you'll learn to break it down into valid or invalid rejections.
I haven't gotten rid of it, I just accepted it and realize that no matter how attractive I am nor how good of a talker I am their will always be girls who simply don't like me
U learn that rejection is just somthing u live with and that its not a massive reflection on yourself
Make the move, go out of that comfort zone and if you are rejected it's no loss but you will know going forward. (Just take any no''s as no for now, not as no not ever unless you find out later otherwise.)
Easy. I don't chase women. I don't seek relationships. I fully accept single life as being better than being in a relationship and/or being rejected.
First admit it , then face it... Then conquer it. 1) Admit to yourself
2) Engage yourself in making a move.
3) Conquer your fear by facing it straight on no shits givin.
4) Reapeat as needed.
Take it this way. You're going in with nothing, the worst that can happen is coming back out with nothing.
Give yourself a pet on the back for racking up the courage to do it. And treat yourself to ice cream.
Be rejected and deal with it. You shouldn't be asking how to avoid adversity. There will be plenty. Roll with the punches, learn and improve.
Best way is to just experience rejection, and find out first hand that it's not a big deal.
I don't think experiencing it will make you think its not a big deal,
I've been rejected a million times and I still get sad about it...
I think it's the mentality and thought processes going on in the individuals mind that makes them numb to rejection or sad about it, it's most likely she needs a pharapist to change how she thinks
This may not be the best option, but it works for me.
Get rejected, prepare for it, and accept it
Most important, always expect it to happen even if there's a 1% chance
Know that as a woman, your success rate is very very high.
Even if you don't get the outcome you want, every guy will be happy that you did. And you have just made their whole year.
Honestly, the best way is to be rejected and then, with time, seeing it isn't the end of the world. Rejection is actually a long term good thing
If you're friendly and let people know you're open to conversations, you'll have a guy approaching you. Women dont have to approach so just be friendly and a guy will hit you up
Stop chasing after guys that are out of your league.
How to know if he is out of my league
@awkwardddgirl If he thinks he is doing well, he is not out of your league. If you believe you would be doing well, he is probably out of your league. If he will hang around while you put him off for a dozen dates, he is not out of your league. If you give in 3 dates or less, because, if you don't, you fear you will lose him, he is out of your league.
I don't really think of it nor do I even bother to try really
You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. or something like that.
Let me know when you find the answer. I'm searching for it myself
It's painful and I know from experience but the only way to conquer a fear is to face that fear dead in the eyes and challenge it.
by getting used to it
i was worked as insurance sales agent before for 3 years and had thousands rejection on total
Practice humility.
Quite literally practice getting rejected and dealing well with it.
Think exposure therapy.
Know that rejection is a part of life, and that it isn't the end of the world. There are other fish in the sea
You can’t you have to wait for the guy to approach you when you’re older
I've never got over that fear. You just gotta jump in and go for it sometimes.
Just got a say f it. And go for it been my way. It seems to me to work.
Well, the way I was taught to do it is by getting rejected until I stopped giving a fuck.
Life moves on. It hurts at first. But you will learn to let go of it.
You will be fine.
You're still young so I wouldn't worry about it too much. I'm sure you'll get stronger with time.
If u are teenager u have to work on it. and if u are older than 18 u will have fear for the rest of your life.
Number one way is to count on it.. expect it..
It's not a choice made by you
Factory in who they chose before who they rather now...
Realize you're a girl and you have that part of life on easy mode
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