How can I overcome defeating thoughts about myself and dating?

[Anonymous]

My friends repeatedly tell me a guy was checking me out or that men like me but I don’t see it, and I justify ever guy who checks me out as “oh he probably just does it to everyone.” I get hit on pretty regularly too but I’m too dumb to see it. I even had my best guy friend (I’d date him but he lives too far and now has a girlfriend) take me to two $300 dinners. My brother-in-law was like “yeah, he definitely liked you.” I always get skeptical when a guy smiles or stares at me, and I think it’s usually cuz I have something on my face or something.
I don’t feel sexy or like anyone is actually into me. Could it be the truth, or am I struggling with a self esteem problem that’s sabotaging me?
I want to think more positively and eventually get married.

[WhitneySnow]

Next time listen to your friends when they tell you someone’s checking you out

[Asker]

Some girl several years ago poisoned my perspective on men by telling me that men just see women as objects and don’t respect us at all. And that men check out every woman and that I’m not special. I was 20 at the time and easily influenced, so this has stuck with me ever since.

[WhitneySnow]

That is not true. They only check out girls they think they are hot. They might still objectify you, but some guys really want a real relationship.

[OddBeMe]

Experience and dating maturity. Just like with sports…takes practice.

[Iron_Man]

Trying to stay positive force yourself

[In_Trance]

Get professional help

[UniquelyBasic]

Try therapy