Dating 6 mos. he’s 34 I’m 33. He just started doing this where he’s talking about never being complacent with each other, how he never wants to be. how he “always wants to be 1% better every day for me because I’m worth it” etc. I tried telling him that being complacent a little comfortability and u trust them emotionally etc. and you can relax not have to try so hard but yes I should never let yourself go and stop trying. He doesn’t like that I’m tired more than him he wants me to for example not make excuses and go for that jog at 7 AM when I have to work 12 hours etc and he’s just so extreme like a self help book and I told him it’s ok to be more laid back and enjoy life. And he said he doesn’t like people being lazy and making excuses for everything and those are the girls he’s dated in the past. We fought about having kids, we both want kids. he knows I don’t make very much where he makes around 100 K a year and every question he would ask and then answer that I don’t know what I’m talking about or I have no clue because I can’t afford this or that and what am I going to contribute and I said I will still pay half of the mortgage, I will still pay my half just because I don’t make as much as you and he’s like are u even saving what are you gonna do for this kid you have no clue etc. i live on my own and pay my own bills now I’m independent. it just seems like he’s over challenging me lately. it makes me feel bad like I’m not good enough for him. I told him I cannot contribute to the cabin it’s so expensive and he’s afraid of losing it someday, basically was saying it’s either keeping the family cabin or a kid because he can’t afford both. I said I’m being selfless here, the cabin is your life I’m not gonna have a kid with u then because you’re gonna end up resenting me. And he’s just making me feel bad lately. Like I’m not good enough. The one day it was our day off I wanted to sleep in and he was mad that “I was tired I was making an excuse it was a mindset”
Updates
1 y
I should add our sex life is great. Almost every day. I initiate it too. We are affectionate towards each other. He gives me the love and attention I deserve. And I love Him dearly but this is just getting to be a little much. Plus he downplays my feelings when I’m having a bad day and he’s always optimistic and jokes when I’m in a sad/bad mood.
