Girl's Behavior 
Guy's Behavior 
Flirting 
Dating 
Relationships 
Fashion & Beauty 
Health & Fitness 
Marriage & Weddings 
Shopping & Gifts 
Technology & Internet 
Break Up & Divorce 
Education & Career 
Entertainment & Arts 
Family & Friends 
Food & Beverage 
Hobbies & Leisure 
Other 
Religion & Spirituality 
Society & Politics 
Sports 
Travel 
Trending & News 
Should a trans woman (post-op) write on her dating profile that she is trans or should she tell the guy individually? (Page 2)
Anonymous
(30-35) 
Click "Show More" for your mentions
Most Helpful Opinion(mho) Rate.
Learn more
Learn more
We're glad to see you liked this post.
You can also add your opinion below!
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
68Opinion
Yes, it should be on the profile, because whoever you date will find out regardless when you meet, and straight men aren't going to want a guy who had surgery to look like a girl.
You aren't going to have situations where you tell a straight guy that you are trans and he doesn't lose interest. it's considerate to be upfront about who you are and not waste people's time who are looking for something that you aren't.
To be quite blunt, I'm really not sure why people have these types of surgeries, if you like guys, it would have been better to stay a regular guy, because your options then were gay guys and bi guys, and if you look mostly female now, your options are just bi guys, so you kind of cut down your already tiny dating pool even more than it already was. May I ask why?
Because some people are genuinely trans. They don’t choose to be trans, it’s genetic. A straight man is attracted to femininity and if the trans woman has all the right equipment, she can be with a straight man who is okay with a woman who is infertile. Not everyone wants biological kids anyway
Thats not how it works.
1. The only people that are born a different gender than they are conceived, have androgen insensitivity syndrome. Having surgery to become a different gender is different, people who do that were not born trans, they just think they were, because they wrongfully subscribe to mental stereotypes for men and women, and thus think how they feel mentally has anything to do with gender (it doesn't, mental genders are a myth created by culture, only biological genders exist, men and women often think the same, and people are individuals, not "male brained" or "female brained").
2. No straight male is ok with that scenario, whether they want kids or not. I don't want kids, and I'd never date a trans person for physical reasons alone. You could get someone who's bi and thats about it. Yes, I'm ok with a infertile woman, I'd prefer it, but you're not a woman, your a man who resembles a woman superficially in certain physical aspects, but not others (some of which are sexually very important, for example trans women do not have natural vaginal lubricant, a complex cervix, real breasts, or female voices or smells, just to name a few, and just knowing you were male is a mental turn off for straight men). Any guy who says otherwise is not actually straight.
well that depends on what sort of relationship they're going for. they want a fake ass relationship full of lies? don't bother to tell. but if they're looking for something serious and meaningful, they should be honest. cause "post op trans genitalia" is not "a vagina" and i think most guys would want a "vagina". i know this truth may hurt someones feelings but it is what it is.
Beat to write. It will save both parties a lot of time and the matches you will get will be from those who are ok with you being you.
Best to write*
@kthomas3007 this might add bonus points for the honesty on your profile.
Honesty is the best policy. I’ve had amazing dates from that but the latest guy I met up with just left me in the bar during the date. He messaged me by text saying that he couldn’t cope with it in the end despite the fact that he saw my profile beforehand and arranged to meet. What a dick , right? 😅
A real dick yea. Defo not a gentleman. Sorry to hear that but on the plus side you have had amazing dates too and many more to come too. Hey, can we chat if its ok with you? Its ok if you say no, i will respect that.
I agree that it's best to write.
Online dating? It should be on your profile. You know that it will be a deal-breaker for many men. Why waste their time and yours?
Also there's the possibility that someone may be angered to the point of violence. Why risk that?
Ok, maybe not 9n the profile, but you should definitely disclose this before meeting.
Yeah, I am very selective. And if I found someone special after disclosure before meeting, no one else matters :)
No it doesn't, and I wish you good luck.
I would say yes, absolutely.
For her safety and also to save her time and whoever she matches with their time as well. You want the best partner for yourself, so you absolutely should be transparent with your sexuality and any other potential deal breakers. Especially with cis men.
I feel as though it should be upfront. I know it's scary to admit that you are one because of what people will think but, I think the person has a right to know, right away. That way they can say yes or no. And yes, I realize that means they'd be making a judgment based solely on that but, we do it all the time with other things, like race too, right? So why is this any different
I agree but the last part is too true hurtful but true.
@BlckGrl That's the point. It sucks, but it's true
I think it should be upfront in the profile. Why waste time with someone if they aren't okay with that? Personally, I am hoping to have kids naturally with my partner and that would be a dealbreaker right away.
Write it on the dating profile. Dont want someone's time.
"On one hand, it's not everyone business..." hard disagree. Someone can't consent to making out/having sex with you if you are dishonest about who you are. They didn't consent to the act of having sex with a transwoman, they thought they consented to having sex with a biological woman. Not revealing the fact that you're transgender is sexual assualt/rape by deceit.
*Don't waste someone's time
Not sure putting in the bio can lead to harassment and hate comment but not putting in bio and telling them in private message can lead the guy to be violent and insult you so there's not really a good answer to it.
It doesn’t have to be on their public profile, but I think it’s something they should tell them individually before they even go on a date
I don't think you need to tell on your profile but you should tell during the first conversation with someone.
Doing it off the bat in the profile is the best choice. Then they are at least upfront about it to those who are not about that and helps them find those that would be okay or tolerate that.
Absolutely share. Hiding something like that might get abusive. Some men can be very reactive when comes to sexuality.
Should? No, you can do whatever feels right to you individually
But I think it would be helpful tho and save the person a lot of unnecessary conversations
I'd at least mention it in a message before meeting. Not for nothing but some guys are asses and might throw a punch if they weren't happy about it if you told them in person.
... or a transguy - as it's the same thing.
People seem to forget that other people have dealbreakers too. You could identify as an apache attack helicopter, for all it matters to you.
But the other people need to know you're nuts.
She should at least let him know before meeting him. Ideally in the first few messages.
Have a meet in person predate type thing, tell it there
Get to know the person a little bit in real life before any intimacy sounds good and reasonable too :)
Unless you're blind, in the vast majority of cases it is quite obvious. We can totally tell a woman from a man who thinks he's a woman. Not only men, but every single human being can (children included). So there's no reason for you to clarify unless you want to.
I would say tell people in person. You're a woman now, it shouldn't matter that you weren't always one.