Is it too soon?

[Anonymous]

I've been seeing this guy (30M) for almost two months, I spend two night every week with him, we both have kids so of course they are around too. We are both seeing each other exclusively. In the beginning he was very positive about everything, but about two weeks in he expressed doubts, or being on the fence about having a relationship with me. However, despite that we continued to see each other and date. From what I can tell he has a good time when we're together, as do I. I want to talk to him about where it's going but I'm scared it might be too soon? I mean he must like me if he continues to see me and talk to me every day. Though we've never talked about the subject of a relationship since he expressed being back and forth about it. I just want to make sure he's ready to talk about it and not do it too soon so I dint scare him off. It's the first relationship I've had that's healthy, I can't fault him for feeling the way he does, everyone is allowed to have their feelings. I just don't want to mess it up. Is it too soon to talk about it? How do I go about bringing it up?

[TommyMountainFigure]

Please help me understand something.. I'm not judging you for it, but how on earth can you be close enough to doink each other's brains out, yet not be close enough to discuss a relationship together?

[Asker]

We did discuss it In the beginning, we agreed it's what we wanted. It was weeks later that he expressed being on the fence about it. But he stuck around, I'm not sure if I should wait for him to be ready to talk about it or bring it up myself. I don't think it really matters, it just makes me nervous. Though I know it has to happen soon.

[TommyMountainFigure]

But you're still sleeping together, so there is closeness there.. I don't see what the big deal is in discussing relationships..

[Asker]

I just don't know when the right time is, I really like him and I don't want to rush it or mess it up

[TommyMountainFigure]

Ok let's put aside how you both feel about each other for a second k? Forget the possibility of relationships... Your kids are now friends.. you both owe it to each other to sort whatever this out for THEM.. They will suffer if things don't get sorted and things turn sour.. I would insist o talking about where the relationship is going, if not for you both, then for them!