What are the odds of an extremely jealous and controlling person changing?

[Anonymous]

I have the opportunity to go back to an ex boyfriend who was emotionally abusive , sometimes violent and very controlling mainly because of his insecurities and jealousy. I’ve been talking to him for almost a year to see if he’s truly changed and he seems to have gotten over those insecurities, he doesn’t express any kind of jealousy anymore and has promised me to never act in a controlling manner ever again. Is possible that he changed

[SueShe]

I don't believe that it is possible on such a short notice, even after therapy.

He may have the motivation to improve as long as you are not together but as soon as you get back together, things will resume where you left them prior to your separation.

The routine that existed will take over and he might do a big effort in the beginning to show you that he has changed but that will not last. After 6 months of being together, you will slowly notice a change and all the promises will progressively disappear in favor of the old habits.

Unfortunately, some things never change.

[Iron_Man]

Hi Sue it was a wonderful beautiful July 4th awesome commercial fireworks I hope you saw them in the sky’s as you sat at Wembley Stadium enjoying it 😊

[SueShe]

@Iron_Man I did see the fireworks and when I increased the magnifying of the telescope to its maximum, I could even spot you standing next to this guy. Who was this girl behind you on the left that constantly kept looking at you? You quickly turned around and you seemed to either smile at her or talk to her. I could not see too well because of the darkness.

[Iron_Man]

Aww your a trip lol 😂

[countrygirl8754]

Ummm. . u wanna be extremely careful because if u go back it can lead to the same problems all over again of him doing this to u. Even though I don't know who u r I really don't want u to get hurt.

[YouaskedBrian]

The answer you'd like to hear is yes. Anyone can evolve into a new version of themselves. But if this person was truly a narcissist, I'd be very careful. Take it slow and pay close attention to the changes. Do you feel like a possession to this person? Do you feel your needs are being treated equal to his? I think if you ask yourself questions like this and be willing to be honest with yourself. You can probably answer this question on your own. I hope, for your sake, that he's changed. Good luck!

[loveslongnails]

Don't be the dog who returns to lick its own vomit.

What are the odds that he's changed?
They're about equal playing golf in the morning and getting 4 hole's-in-one, buying a winning $100 million lottery ticket, then walking out onto the street and being eaten by a bear while simultaneously being struck by lightning in a sun shower.

Pretty good odds, hmmm?

[Guy13]

It is highly unlikely as it is a tool for Control. So it is likely that the Tool will change but the Control will ot. So, unless you want to personally experience the varied Means of Control then... YOU should decide-what's up...

[Static_In_The_Attic]

Question: What are the odds of an extremely jealous and controlling person changing?
Answer: You have a better change of getting hit by lightning on a submarine.

[Gent207]

Please don't return to him!
Those people WILL NEVER CHANGE

[slatyb]

Very unlikely. Has he sought professional help for his anger?

[dudeinohio]

NO! He's just attempting to lure you back. Abusers never change, except to get worse. Getting back with him endangers your. life.

[MikeInHawaii]

Always assume people won’t change. If you don’t want them as-is, move on.

[CallmeTheKnight]

The odds are 0%. You listed why he's your ex and you want to go back to him?

...

[anylolone]

Very little with someone they were abusive towards.

[driven159]

more than likely not that is part of his DNA not easy to ignore that in time he will go back to that

[RobEurope]

I think its only possible with cognitive behavior therapy.

[Iron_Man]

He hast to be willing to commit and be serious

[Lliam]

I doubt it.

[Crankor]

Doesn't happen

[Sam_25]

0% chance

[noohair]

Big fat ZERO!!!