What are you going to do if you find out or have a strong instinct that your spouse/partner looking for affair?

[Anonymous]

like there's proof yet, but you could feel it by his reaction towards you a bit cold, doesn't care much as before, no longer wish good morning and goodnight..

Updates

1 y

no proof yet*

[GlassTop]

Looking for an affair is different from having one. You are already blaming him for a crime he hasn’t committed. Now if you say he might have cheated, that’s completely different. Treating you cold stems from dissatisfaction in the relationship. Work on that and repair it instead of suspecting cheating. Pull it from the roots before anything bad happens.

[Asker]

but how to repair? I'm trying my best already. being always sweet, care, etc.

[GlassTop]

You gotta have a sit down. No hidden feelings. No hiding secrets. Be straightforward about your feelings. No hinting. No suggestions. Tell him how you feel about your relationship gently and calmly. Tell him to give you 5 minutes to explain and how much you want the relationship to work.

[Asker]

that's tough

[GlassTop]

It is. But it’s up to you. If your relationship is worth it I would. Or just continue how it’s going hoping it will change naturally or eventually the relationship will end which you may want.

[Asker]

yeah... thank you for advice.. 😔

[GlassTop]

If you don’t want to do that you can try being really sweet to him and catch him off guard. Write him a letter telling him how much you love him. Surprise him with some kiss or cuddles. Maybe a surprise BlowJob. He will wonder what is going on and not know how to reciprocate. It will make him realize how much of a great person you are and will start thinking you are the one he should be with forever. That’s my second suggestion. The first one was the last ditch effort if the relationship is on its last legs.

[Asker]

I'll do that! that is nice idea.!

[Guy13]

There is devotedly a vibe? Have you experienced any of the following: -change of habit or pattern? Unable to reach for awhile? -Felt distance? Increase in SM and phone usage? Deleting history? Keeps phone, email, and SM from you recently? Why don’t you trust me? More time “at work”

[ochitougly]

Just talk about it with him and work on getting your marriage back together… he might not have an affair yet but he’s probably close… if you guys can’t fix it then you should break up before you get hurt

[Asker]

I'm not good at talking tbh.. every time I try to talk about it, that moment will be not the right time to talk about it

[ochitougly]

If you love him or care about your marriage you have to, sometimes we have to do things we don’t feel confortable with. My tip for this is just set your self a date to talk to him and stick to it no matter what… it doesn’t matter if he gets sick, it rains, your tired, your pet dies… you just have to do it… like taking a cold shower or drinking medicine

[Asker]

ask for a date... that will be horrible moment

[ochitougly]

Never lose your goal out of sight and go for it! In this case you’re marriage! You’ll be fine!

[Asker]

thank you for the advice honey