How to stop feeling so upsets and bitter when I see cute couples because I’m single?

[Anonymous]

whenever I see the cutest couples known to man king I’ll get so bitter and even a little resentful towards them. It’s like the guy will seem so sweet and handsome and I’ll be so jealous of the girl not even because of him specifically (because they’re are tons of nice cute guys in the world) but the fact she got so lucky it’s insane how lucky people are to get into relationships like how do you even start to date it feels impossible and I’ve never even had a boyfriend before. It makes me so mad because I can’t even envision myself having something like that happen to me statistically it feels so improbable and hopeless I just get pissed off.

[D-Pad_Chad]

Listen, your exceptionally young. You have a good 10-12 maybe even 14 years to get sorted.

Answer a few questions and I might be able to help a bit. These aren't in a specific order.

1. Weight?

2. Thoughts on marriage?

3. Thoughts on traditional/modern roles for men/women?

4. Thoughts on having children?

5. Have you thought about therapy for your jealousy issue? I ask because I feel it could lead to controlling behavior within a relationship and that would poison it.

6. Have you thought about reevaluating your male friends within your social circle that may like you and those you may have deemed "unworthy"?

[Asker]

First of all I think the whole eight think men asks is shameless and weird but I’m in the average healthy weight of my height bracket under 120.
2. Obviously if I want to date marriage is fine no one is rejecting me because of that lmao
3. This question seems odd, I want to love and be loved I don’t know what the whole trad wife thing even means to you. As long is we’re happy it’s fine.
4. I like kids
5. Im not consistently jealous I’m just a human I get upset sometimes. This si me being upset
5. I have no male friends

[Asker]

Shamelessly asking a woman’s weight*

[D-Pad_Chad]

Here's the deal. Most men universally like specific traits in women.
Agreeableness, attractiveness (Q1), and fertility (Your age dictates this). Now fertility and attractiveness is a race against time, fertility goes in most women by the age of around 32-40. Attractiveness is subjective, but most men like women who are healthy, obese is not healthy nor attractive to a majority of men.

Q2 is because a lot of women want to date, but not get married these days. This also gave me an idea of which way you leaned as far

Q3 this is basically a framework of different ideologies for relationship roles. Given your answers I'd wager you lean more traditional based on your answer to Q4, Q1, & Q2, but that's a guess. I know most men prefer traditional.

In regards to Q5 I wasn't sure what degree and range your jealously was, it sounded a bit over the top in the question so I thought I'd put the idea of therapy out there in case you felt you needed to hear it. No shame in seeking help when you need it.

Q6 hm... given your age and healthy weight I'd have to ask what are you looking for in a guy, from there I can give a few suggestions on where you can find them. I. E. if you're into fitness maybe a gym, if your a gamer check out gaming conventions or stores. Into cars, check out auto shows. etc...

And before anyone says I'm hitting on you or something of the like, I was married for 17 years and after that, looking at the dating prospects around me... yeah I opted to stay single. But I'm willing to help anyone whose willing to listen. I know it's a wall of text but hopefully it's helpful for you.

[Bethany22]

The moment I stopped caring about that kind of stuff was the exact same day a nice guy i knew from before asked me out. I was around your age at the time. As much as we wish we could walk out the door on a certain day with the goal of getting a boyfriend, the reality is we have to suck it up and just find other hobbies. i should note though, that that day I gave up on men, it wasn't as if I just stayed in the house feeling sorry for myself. I put on a well put together outfit on and ventured out in the world. As long as you don' t stop doing that, then if you can't find a boyfriend, then it's not your fault. You know within yourself that you've done everything you can do.

[Anonymous]

Honestly, same lol. I've never dated, but when I find myself starting to get a bit bitter about couples... I always remind myself that there's no such a thing as a perfect relationship.
The couple might seem lovely and perfect outside, but we don't know the whole story.
And relationships always have ups and downs, stress, deceptions...

Then, this instantly reminds me of why I haven't wanted to get into a relationship up until now and am better off alone lol

[Guy13]

You have to go out more. People can feel butter. www.meetup.com

[BJP21]

I looked my area of San Diego and the nearest singles meet is Santa Monica. Thats a hella drive for 50/50 chance of meeting someone.

[Guy13]

@BJP21 I see... that's too bad. There are like societies. For instance, I have blow mold from 1920-1980. We can be a little freaky... and we have a group. Just like antique people have associations. Find a hobby and look for those "Professional Orgs" for those with like interests. I am already preparing for Christmas...

[BJP21]

The culture of dating has changed here in SD. It used to be speed dating at the bar every Friday night now its no more. It seems like nobody dates anymore nor wants to. Its like people are scared of commitment.

[Guy13]

@BJP21 people are depressed by economy, trained to stay in by COVID, and prefer Ease. Internet and SM separates people from meeting and greeting. It’s horrible.

[BJP21]

What amazed me was the last singles meet I saw online in another city, was completely sold out. This gave me quite a bit of hope that people are dating again. They're tired of BS.

[Guy13]

@BJP21 hopefully so. People know bad is here as one can feel it but fo not know when bottom is falling out.

[slatyb]

Get some counseling. What's stopping you from meeting someone yourself?

[Asker]

The fact I can’t find anyone. The guys interested in me are shallow and boring and the guys I like are intimating to go up to and end up being really confusing.

[BJP21]

Whenever I see stuff like that, I smile, knowing I can be that.

[Anonymous]

By knowing that nice couple you see in actuality are probably very unhappy.