What are some reasons why a gorgeous girl hardly get guys flirting with her?

Question

My friend and I were wondering why she never gets asked out. She does get guys looking at her especially when she wears sexy clothing like you would think guys would flock to her the hotter she looks but no it doesn’t really matter what she wears (t shirt and jeans or party dress with full on makeup) guys don’t seem to want to date or talk to her

she’s been single for literally 4 years I think and guys don’t really come up to her when she’s alone or when she’s with us. I feel like more guys come up to me than her and talk to me more than they talk to her but she so pretty. Pics with her permission

abc3643 · Accepted Answer

This is the answer to this question:
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If you Google "Beautiful Girl Syndrome", that's basically saying that beautiful girls can be bitchier and high maintenance because guys are willing to put up with more because she is so beautiful. Guys won't put up with so much shit and work if the girl isn't so attractive.

"Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type 2" is a phrase I coined, but it's a real thing I discovered not quite 40 years ago. This will take some time to explain...

All guys need to feel that they can "win". They view things as something like a competition in which there is some goal that they want to achieve. If a guy wants something and he believes that there is SOME possibility that he may get it, he will get emotionally involved. If he begins to believe that he won't get that, then he begins to withdraw and get emotionally detached. However, sometimes a guy doesn't even think he has a chance, so he doesn't bother...

And this is where "Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type 2" comes in. If a girl is really beautiful, a regular guy thinks:
1. There are a zillion other guys who want her.
2. She almost certainly already has a boyfriend.
3. There is no way she'd be attracted to me; I am not anything special.
4. If she did date me, she'd dump me for some better-looking guy who will hit on her and there definitely will be such a guy.
5. She's going to be bitchy and high maintenance. (In other words, he's thinking she suffers from normal Beautiful Girl Syndrome.)

So, he basically thinks that
1) he doesn't have a chance to get her,
2) if he did, she's going to be a lot of work, and then
3) he'll lose her.

Because oceans of guys think like this - the only exception being the hunky guys - the beautiful girl either can't find a guy or goes with dickhead hunky guys (who suffer from Beautiful Guy Syndrome). Of course, the regular guys see the beauties with the hunky guys and that just reinforces their belief that they don't have a chance...

Oh, and one more thing: Since the beautiful girls can get guys, they are getting laid... So, any new boyfriend has to "compete" against all of her past lovers and many guys don't think they are going to "measure up" (if you know what I mean) compared to those past hunky guys.

So, a beautiful girl needs to be proactive and hit on men instead of waiting for them to hit on her. A beautiful girl being proactive removes doubts males have regarding Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type 2.

Just to reiterate, this is Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type 2 in a nutshell:

If a girl is attractive enough, many guys will not approach her simply because:

1. He thinks he doesn't have a shot because:
A. He thinks she's already taken. After all, a girl that attractive is going to have lots of guys hitting on her.
B. Even if she was available, like with all women, no guy wants to get shot down. With a beautiful girl, guys expect that they will get shot down.

2. If he did get her, she'd be a lot of work to keep her.

3. ... and then she'll eventually leave him for a better-looking / richer guy anyway.

ObscuredBeyond · Accepted Answer

1. Fear she has a boyfriend.

2. Fear of getting MeToo'd over nonsense.

3. Fear that their pursuit will be condemned by meddling busybody third parties, simply because these men are the "wrong" skin color!

I myself have faced this last sort of discrimination often. If the gal isn't white, then any white guy showing interest in her is automatically branded and equated with a serial killer. It's pretty disgusting; but wokism has poisoned the thinking of many to believe and assume along those very lines!

It's not as bad after moving to Florida. I can crush on whomever I want, within reason, and usually get away with it. If the girl wants it, fine. If she doesn't, she'll let me know she isn't interested, and we both move on.

Up north, however, I faced constant judgment from these woke lunatics! Literally anything I said or thought, was automatically "wrong" somehow! There was no pleasing them! And no woman seemed to know how to just say "sorry, not interested." They always had to make out like they were a "victim" - of nothing in particular! It was a psychosis.

19magic · Accepted Answer

I've had a discussion with a friend of mine and we were talking about guys. I stated that i always get hit on and I feel bad that I have to turn them down, she replied that it would be nice to be hit on. I don't think I'm more attractive honestly we're both average and we both can be pretty when we try but she's got a don't touch me vibe and guys can notice that. The same way a girl can notice a guy isn't into her.

We were out on a night out and I got asked to dance via two different guys I accepted had a bit of a laugh and a flirt and said thanks for the dance after one or two. She said to me after that I don't get how you can let a random guy dance with you. I'm so glad he didn't ask me. Maybe your friend gives off those vibes wether intentional or not.

Biancam13 · Accepted Answer

I think it might be the vibe she gives off. She's very pretty and dresses well but maybe she has a serious look on her face which gives off the wrong message if she wants to be approached?

I'm not trying to be harsh but I don't think it's the fact that she's pretty and that guys are intimidated by her beauty, because some of my friends are beautiful like that (some are models) and they get approached quite a lot when we are out, depending on the night.

I would suggest for your friend making eye contact with any guy she finds attractive and smiling a bit. It gives the "green light" so-to-speak for the right guys to come and approach.

Summeroflove · Answer

Because I don’t speak to people I don’t know unless I have to or they talk to me (I don’t wanna be rude). Most people I’m into are people I at least know a little.

If she likes someone then she needs to make a move and stop waiting around on someone else.

They’re probably minding their own business.

There is also a thing. If a woman’s hot. Some guys think she’s way out of their league and would never give him a chance (never know unless you ask), some figure she’s taken, some get too nervous, and then some are taken or not into her.

ManOnFire · Answer

Most men probably think she is a stuck up snob - which, many "very gorgeous" women are. These women use the excuse that they act cold towards men because "every guy" is looking for sex, but they never show this coldness towards the guys who don't even respect them.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Extremely attractive girls can really be intimidating to many, many guys!

Avicenna · Answer

Guys generally don't approach women who seem to be unapproachable because they are perceived as stuck up or likely to reject any guy.

AviatorTom · Answer

Guys may think that she's "out of their league" and have no chance with a gorgeous woman, so they don't even try.

BlueScorpio · Answer

Guys are probably scared to ask her out.

Anonymous · Answer

Because guys today follow the immature bandwagon that wrongfully believe and assume that ALL beautiful women are sluts, bitches, or are already hit on all the time by other guys and NEED to be cut down by men.

They fail to realize that a lot of beautiful women were ugly and picked on most of their lives, are kind and appreciative, shy, introverted, insecure, or feel lonely or ugly because of this stupid ass trend. They are in denial that a beautiful women could possibly feel pain, rejection, or hurt that men feel.

Whoever came up with the term simping was either an insecure misogynist or an insecure boy that couldn't get a date.

They are usually guys brought up without a mom, few morals, bitter little boys, judgmental, insecure, immature, sheep, or just pure misogynist assholes. They weren't raised to treat people with kindness.

They follow trends on Tik Tok and watch bitter misogynists on YouTube give bad advice based on their experiences of the miniscule percentage of women in the world that hurt them (while ignoring the fact that there are two sides to every experience).

Social media is poison. Assuming is poison. Just be kind.

Real men don't judge, assume and treat women like shit just because they are beautiful or "look like a bitch".

There is no need to "cut a woman down", ignore, be rude or mean just because of how she looks. This world is too cruel as is and that won't help it.

McKellar · Answer

With the meetings and trying to get dates these days,... a girl like her looks like she can very very very very easily get a boyfriend no problem. Even if a great guy does approach her,... she looks like her standards are way too high, and the great guy is not at all going to be her type.

Even a guy would fear something like this would happen.

Guy: Hey do you want to go for a drink or coffee or something?

Hot girl: (1st response) I have a boyfriend, sorry. (Indicating she doesn't have a boyfriend, but she wants this guy to go away because he for whatever reason creeps her out)

(2nd response) I'm not looking for a relationship right now, sorry. (Indicating the same thing)

(3rd response) I can't, I have too much of a busy life right now. (Once again indicating the same thing)

But once she does come across a guy she REALLY likes and is her type,... then she'll be automatically all over him for sure and making dating and a possible relationship with him almost effortless... all because he is her type and will be all over him no problem.

Provided if the guy doesn't give her these responses:

(1st response) I have a girlfriend, sorry.

(2nd response) I'm not looking for a relationship right now.

(3rd response) I can't, I have too much of a busy life right now.

Novacane · Answer

Because one thing a very attractive person has is ego, they typically understand that they are really good-looking and society has reinforced the fact that they are good-looking, and most men understand this. Therefore when men see a very pretty woman they know that their standards will be much higher than you average women. So many times it's not worth going up to someone like her. Men understand that women who are prettier typically have no one approach them, but even if they try to approach they know it will lead nowhere. Women like that typically are higher maintenance. We also know that men must perform, there will always be a guy that is taller, better looking, and with more money, and men know that women that are very good-looking are typically looking for that top-tier man and if they find someone better they will leave you.

MementoMori_ · Answer

Her appearance is attractive. There could be several reasons why...

*Some guys might think she is too attractive and assume she is already taken or that she gets too many guys trying to get with her and she would reject them. You can call it "intimidation" if you want, but I think it's more like calculating the odds and deciding to go for someone else. No one likes rejection.

*She may give off a vibe that puts guys off. Looks aren't everything. I have met girls that just give off a bad vibe and although they are attractive to look at, they lose my interest quickly.

William7489 · Answer

That’s easy. It’s just not worth it anymore for some guys. If you look at a very beautiful girl like you’re describing, what are the options? You try to pick her up and take her home for one night stand? Forget about it, just not gonna happen. Or you can try to strike up a conversation, buy her drinks and perhaps ask her out? Yes you can go that route and spend a bunch of money on drinks and possibly get a real phone number or you could get rejected and embarrassed. Even if you do get the number and a date, you’re likely going to be dating a very high maintenance person. That means there’s gonna be tons of competition from other guys, you’re gonna have to be treating her like a princess, constant drama, and she can walk away at any time if she see somebody that’s more appealing than you. To summarize, a lot of guys just don’t see it as being worth it in this day and age.

jahliko123 · Answer

I am one of those guys who doesn't try to flirt with girls who are really pretty. A lot of guys feel out of her league (Either financially like he doesn't make a lot of money or just don't feel handsome) but also they assume that she have a boyfriend or plenty of boyfriends. Perhaps a gold digger? or they don't want to seem like a creep after being rejected. Some girls reject a guy really hard or they cannot handle a rejection. There are probably other reasons but it isn't that they don't find you attractive or think that you are not pretty but usually they feel intimidated by you.

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

I'm going to be blunt so don't get pissed off at me. First of all she's white which comes with connotations. Basically, the assumption is going to be that she'll treat you like shit, only wants black guys, cheat, and only wants money. ... Throw in a dash of "is that a tranny" and you kind of understand.

The use of makeup is a major no-no to a guy like me. I immediately assume she's fake and probably looks like a troll without it. If she walked up to me, my first assumption would be "oh shit, some Karen is about to bitch me out and ask for my manager" 😂 The fear factor of dealing with some bullshit is just to high to even consider her sexually.

Again, I'm not trying to speak for other men... this is just the thoughts that run through my autistic brain when I look at her and I'm hoping this helps. If this chick wore nothing but eyeliner, and threw on a slipknot shirt with ripped jeans, I'd probably be on her like white on rice.

exitseven · Answer

The urban legend goes that guys think that really hot girls are already taken and that if they tried to flirt they would just get shot down so they don't bother to try. When I was in high school there was a girl in my homeroom that I thought was the hottest girl in the school. She was not a cheerleader and didn;t really hang out with the popular kids. She did not seem to have a boyfriend. I figured she was going out with older guys. I tried to talk to her a couple of times but it never went anywhere. A couple of years later I was talking to this kid that lived next door to her. He told me that she used to stay home most of the time and didn't really go out much.

JSmuve · Answer

It's funny, women complain about guys approaching them when they're out yet still expect us to "flock" to them. No. We'll go up to the women if the setting is right and she gives out some indication that she wants to be approached, but that's all on her. My guess is, she doesn't know how to indicate she wants to be approached.

She's probably at least doing one of these consistently

- moves around too much,

- often in groups,

- has her headphones on

- appears busy with something (phone/work),

- doesn't smile, RBF

- avoids eye contact

- turns her back to guys

- crosses her arms

She'd do well to learn how to flirt with her body language.

Moose304 · Answer

This is a very complicated issue and there are no easy answers. In some places, a male can get into legal trouble simply by speaking to a female. They can be asked to leave a business. The me2 movement has changed the landscape of female/male relationships. The other day I was speaking to a middle manager who was upset because her boss a company VP refuses to mentor her. He will go out and have drinks with men but keeps her at arm's length away. When they have meetings he says another person must be in the room. Etc. As I said, it's complicated and it's still evolving. In the meantime, men are protecting themselves.

lightbulb27 · Answer

Pretty girls can be intimidating.

if their "energy" is negative or put offish... e. g. isn't smiling or inviting, then many shy away.

If she's really thin, that can be a deterent for some.

There's no subsitiute for smiling, pleasant demeanor in all people...

Lookingforthetruth · Answer

For one or more of the following reasons:

1. They assume she's taken

2. They have already made it up in their mind that she will reject them and don't think its worth putting in the effort for a loss cause.

3. She may have a resting bitch face/come off as cold and unapproachable.

4. She may not have much of a personality and guys give up even attempting to flirt because they consider her boring.

5. They don't want to get metoo. In this current dating environment, flirting with women in public spaces can cost you your job and reputation.

6. They are intimidated by her.

7. They have self respect and don't want to jester max for a woman in order to get into a relationship with her. aka MGTOW.

Anonymous · Answer

The stereotype that men only care about looks is false. We care about personality, warmth, character and values too. Some women just give off an off-putting vibe that is a turnoff. For example, I can often look at a woman and tell she is a feminist or has negative attitudes toward men just by her manner. I won't approach a woman like that no matter how good she looks physically.

But all of this begs the question... why would she just sit around waiting for guys to approach her rather than taking some initiative herself? Why would she stay single fo four years if she doesn't want to just because she is too lazy, cowardly or entitled to approach guys herself? I will never understand this female mentality.

ZackBan · Answer

Honestly I look at this girl and wait to see her swimmer body boyfriend with 6 packs coming up behind her.

I think that is why she's not getting Apprached, believe it or not she might crush it if she actually took a little less care of her appearance when going out instead of looking like a model

What are some reasons why a gorgeous girl hardly get guys flirting with her?

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