Why won't he kiss me?

[Anonymous]

Today was my third date with this guy and we still haven't kissed, but he wants to keep seeing me.

Why won't he kiss me? Maybe he is just shy? He only gives hugs but he is saying he wants to pursue this relationship and take me out, he is planning future dates calling me honey and stuff. I know if a guy really likes you won't touch you on the first date but i dont think a kiss on the third one is a big deal.

Updates

+1 y

Guys he is definitely NOT GAY

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm that is kinda weird that he hasn't kissed you yet after 3 dates. A few possibilities:

- Maybe he's just really nervous/shy about it. Some guys can be scared to make the first move even if they really like a girl.

- Could be he's trying to take things super slow. But I'd think after 3 times seeing each other a little kiss would be okay.

- Possibly he's just not that into you romantically. But then it's strange he's planning more dates and stuff.

- I guess there's a small chance he might not be interested in girls. But seems unlikely if he's asking you out.

My advice would be to have a talk with him. Bring it up casually like "So everything's been going good, right? Just wondering where you see things going between us..." Then listen to what he says.

If he gives some excuse about taking it slow still, I'd say give it one more date. But if he still doesn't make a move then you gotta decide if you wanna keep waiting or find someone who's more into you, ya feel me? Good luck! Let me know what happens.

[Asker]

Thanks for being helpful

[Oliverlogan263]

You're welcome girl! Dating can be so confusing sometimes. I'm always here if you need someone to vent to or get a second opinion.

I hope the talk with him goes well and gives you more clarity. Maybe he just needs a little nudge to realize how into him you are too. Try flirting and snuggling up a bit closer each date - sometimes subtle hints help a shy guy feel more comfortable making a move.

But whatever happens, just have fun with it and don't stress too much. A kiss shouldn't be the deciding factor if you really click otherwise. Wishing you all the best in figuring this out - keep me posted how it goes! You got this :)

[Asker]

We had the talk and turns out he is just as nervous as me and he was scared to make a move. He said he is afraid i won't like him if he lets me know this but he admits he thinks i'm "way out of his league" (which is not true in fact i thought i was out of his league) and he just didn't want to screw it up and tried to act like a tough guy. Miscommunication happens i'm glad i took the initiative and asked him about it. Thanks for the advice! Hoping to get that kiss this weekend on the fourth date we just planned

[Asker]

Sorry i mean i thought *he was out of my league*

[Oliverlogan263]

Awww that's so cute! I'm glad y'all were able to clear the air and have an honest chat. It's really sweet that he was just as nervous as you deep down. And totally normal - when you really like someone it's easy to psych yourself out and overthink things. I'm always telling my guy friends they gotta be bold and take a chance sometimes! Don't let insecurity get in the way. Sounds like you both see how awesome the other person is. I'm sure that kiss is gonna be magical this weekend after building things up for a few dates. Way to go for communicating openly sis - that's so important, especially early on. Really sets the tone for a healthy relationship. I'm happy for you! This fourth date is gonna be bomb. Keep the good vibes rolling y'all. You give me hope, haha. 😊

[Summeroflove]

My gosh… Give it time irs the third date. Maybe you need to slow things down a little bit. You wouldn’t want someone pushing you where you don’t feel comfortable. No obviously it’s doesn't mean he’s gay. Maybe you have different boundaries and maybe you aren’t compatible?

[Serkee]

I used to be scared to kiss, it made me feel really self-conscious. What if I was doing it wrong? How's my breath? Should I pucker up or move my mouth? That sort of thing. I've only had one girlfriend, but she broke me of that fear by just pulling me into a kiss out of the blue every now and then.

[The_Sexpert]

He's perspectives might be different
For some holding hands on first date is normal for some it's not
Similarly for you kissing on a third date is cool but he might think that'd be too pushy of him to do so

[RebelinSteel]

You may be his first girlfriend and he’s not kissed anyone before.

[Asker]

He is 25 and has had a girlfriend before (im 21)

[RebelinSteel]

Weird, personally that is getting to red flag territory

[moneymagnet24]

If she don't sleep with me on second date then i dump her..
Your guy is gay

[Asker]

Im a woman with morals and boundaries and im looking for a serious relationship so i definitely don't sleep with someone right away. I'd give it a few weeks of dating before letting him come over. I would dump someone who is trying to sleep with me on the second date

[moneymagnet24]

Now I know why he didn't kiss ya yet 😂😂

[exitseven]

He is shy. Its a scary thing.

[jahaims]

You can kiss him

[Twalli]

Initiate the kiss.